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Jeanne, that sounds like fun. I always used to feel so torn on Thanksgiving when both my parents and inlaws would ask us to dinner. We'd end up doing dinner at one house and dessert at the other, alternating it every year, running around stressed. It was no fun. I like the no stress/no turkey Saturday dinner at your house idea much better. I hope Coy can join everyone.
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Greetings to everyone! Holidays can be both stressful and joyful ... sometimes concurrently!

We have not gotten together on Thanksgiving Day for many years. Instead we have our gathering later, often on Saturday or Sunday. That allows grandkids who work in restaurants to participate better and everyone to go to in-laws if applicable. When we do get together it is about 25 people.

This year the gathering will be at my house, because Coy is basically bed-bound. I specified that all I'll offer is the setting, not any of the preparation. We are doing it on Sunday the 18th and not doing the traditional turkey. Instead the theme is Italian food. Several family members are gathering at my granddaughter's house tomorrow and doing homemade ravioli with several meat and vegetarian fillings and sauces (No, no Italian ancestry in the family, but we are all dedicated foodies.)

Maybe Coy can join us for a little while. Or he can entertain a few people at a time from his hospital bed. We all know how to play it by ear, don't we?
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Thank you KAW. after reading myself last night i got disgusted, so i tried to work a little around the house. little things i should have been doing all along. i'm almost done filling my new pretty file box, it's a seagrass one and i bought pretty color file folders. someday my house will be nice. hopefully before the Mary Kay party my daughter is throwing here in early december! O.O

Austin, i meant to tell you last night how awesome you were to tell the pastor off!

i know the holidays are often hard for people, i hope you will all find ways to find joy in it. i'm going to try.
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Pam: so sorry your feeling bad! Absolutely, rant away. We KAW do that because we know someone is always here to listen. We are professional ranters.
Austin: so glad your back with us. You sound much better. You've had a lot dumped on you since sandy. Hope your getting some rest.
Cat has been on my mind. So much everyone is going thru these last couple months. Love everyone! Lisa
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Pam! I've missed you. I'm sorry you're feeling like crap. Austin is right, keep coming back and blabbing - even if its just a rant or a complaint or a big, bummed out comment - it may be a sort of therapy for you, and, well, you've been missed, so I'll take what I can get!!
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Pamula I am so sorry and hope you feel better soon-I have been away for about 6 weeks first a wedding then a funeral for my mother so I have missed big chuncks of others lives-keep posting that is a good way to put your feeling down in words and here others will be able to help you feel better.
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i'm sorry i haven't been in, but i'm not pleasant company. while i was in Tx, before i left, i had written a very very long message here to everyone, but after i submitted it, this site ate it with an error message and it was gone. to this day i have no idea what was in it. my brain is such mush with the medication, there is no way of getting something like that back. so i was depressed. i can't remember if i told ya'll they tripled my gabapentin? my speech is slurred, my typing is off, my thinking is fuzzy. so i don't even leave the house unless i have to.

my emotions are all over the place. no. they are mostly down. i miss David horribly. the pain is getting to me. i'm on facebook because i can pretend to be happy there for a little while. mostly i just comment on other people's stuff. then i feel like i should delete most of it. i will probably want to delete this. sorry again. i know ya'll are in worse places than i am.
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Things have been a bit a roller coaster here with mom since the first week into Oct. She needs daily help to function at her best but we are not able to give to her daily because sis and I both work. Without sounding selfish, I will not give up my job even tho it is only part time cuz I need the money and the break. Sis needs her job cuz she is by herself. On Sunday evening mom called me (it was all I could do not to laugh) wanting to know if I took her freezer racks...why would I need her freezer racks, Lol!! I told her what I always say when she can't find something, its there at your house you probably don't remember taking them out, I do that all the time too mom. I am going thru changes in what I call growing up...during the last month, I have started to see my mother as a person...not just mom who has been abusive, nasty and difficult. I am and always have an emotional person with my heart on my shirt sleeve, so I switch back and forth from deep sadness at losing my mother to this disease and being angry, especially her treatment of my father...how she emasculated him over the years. Yes I know I can't champion him now that he is gone and that he let it happen...
The wonderful news is that we will have our son, daughter, and son-in-law here for Thanksgiving. My daughter and son-in-law will not be staying with us because since moving to Idaho with the drier climate, my sil has developed asthma and is allergic to cats. My kitty is an indoor/outdoor kitty and would be impossible to make the house allergy free. I am going all out in making Thanksgiving a great one for everyone here as it is the first Thanksgiving with both my children here in 2 years and, I believe it will be the last Thanksgiving with mom living at home. Halloween is not a big deal with us since my work schedule is a swing shift and hubby has been working overtime since June.
I have finally gotten all the sanding done in my daughters old room...smoothing out the horizontal lines of paint build up due to a wains coating on 3 walls. I hope to paint next week!! I am excited to get this room going since I have working on it for several month as we have the $$. Next will be saving for flooring in that room.
I send lots of hugs to everyone...Lisa, Jeanne, Kimbee, Austin, Cat, JudyW, Punch and Judy,Joan and everyone else!! Sharyn
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Joan good for you to volunteer at the hospital you will be good for those who are sick and worried -just wash your hands a lot I was one of the healthist nurse even with fibro and all because I washed my hand so much-you will be a light in people's world.
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That is funny about traveling light. My nephews were upset our internet or wi-fi as they call it was out when we came to my house the night before the funeral but when they saw they could get a shower and a hot meal after 3 days with no power the shower and hot meal sounded good-they have no idea about real life-I wanted to sit them down and talk about rationing in WW2 but did not.
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I think you are right, austin. I swear I will be rescuing till I am 100 - and happy to be able to.
Your story of your granddaughter made me laugh. Yes, we could teach 'em, Years ago dd and I went on a shopping trip (good memories) and she commented that she could travel light. Well, guess who borrowed my hair stuff, a blouse. a belt..l. I could travel light too, if some one else would bring what I need,
Wild and crazy - right on!!! I would join you in a minute!!! Wouldn't it be fun!!!! For now, a morning nap - 4 hrs sleep again last night aaaargh!
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Joan it seems people like us do not get rescued but girlfriend I think us KAW could show the young em's a thing or two my granddaughter had to borrow gloves and boots to go to work today and went in her pj's-a girlfriend from back in grade school talked for an hour today we are going to get together and get wild and crazyJoan if you lived close you could come with us.
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It's Bond, James Bond to the rescue! My finger nails are sporting invincible gel polish - like shellac - doesn't chip or flake off . It is from the recent James Bond polish collection and is called Goldeneye! Woohoo! Goes well with the blue tights, tuna cans, and leopard print nightie! Gotta a phone call the other night from my son who needed booster cables and a boost, so this 75 year old KAW, got a few warmer things on, brushed off the car again, and went into the snowy night to rescue him - and show my nails off to this wife lol. Gary was at his course, or he would have done it. What I want to know is when is someone going to rescue me??? Oh well, it is good for the circulation!
Punch good to hear from you - gel polish is great too and doesn't chip, and the James Bond collection has some great colours!
Jude and jessie - I think we could have a sub section of the KAW - for square footed women. - good for take off for the falcon punches. My feet are narrow heeled and square across the toes. There was a good looking guy on one of the online dating sites I frequented, and he wanted to meet stubby toed women! There is someone for everyone! I like my square feet too!
Kimbee -good to hear from you, and that you are surviving. Clay is home now with probably a long recovery ahead. Apparently he is still on oral meds as well as morphine - so his stomach will suffer and I expect this could happen again. Sounds like you had great fun at Halloween, and great that mum likes the kitty! Ah, a deer on dh's car - lots of damage I know. Hope your place is secure with all thse break ins going on.
Lisa - gather things are quiet right now. I know American thanksgivng is coming up. Hope you are going to hav a good time with Ray and Mary and that they both are doing reasonably well
Jeanne, thinking of you and Coy ((((((((((((((((hugs)))))))))) and prayers
cat -hope you are doing OK . I know it is a difficult time for you and the inlaws ((((((((((((((((hugs))))))))))))) and prayers for you all too
austin - even with a difficult relationship, a death takes a toll more (((((((((((((((((((hugs )))))))))))))) and prayers
sharyn - and everyone else - how's it going?
had a little fibro flareup again - definitely related to weather and also diet. I really need to follow a hypoglycemic diet quite carefully.I think. Looking into volunteer work, as the hospital needs people. The down side is I don't want to catch every bug around. The upside is I would be in emerg escorting people around as the hospital is under renovations, so I would get to move around and deal with lots of different people. It is like United Nations here with people from around the world. I probably would recognise some ex students!
Thinking of all of you. Much love Joan
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Oh I am so annoyed: I have lost my post four times. I miss you all. Cat so sorry to hear about your family tragedy. Glad you and DH are there for them, I know they are glad too. Joan you made me laugh about the nail glue in the snow, and love those color descriptions. Hold on to that nail glue til winter is over! How is Clay doing? Better I hope. Judy and Punch, I too am a fan of the shellac polish. Tip for you Judy: saturate cotton ball in polish remover, place on nail bed and wrap band-aid around fingertip to hold in place for 5-10 minutes. Comes right off. My mom seems to be unable to keep from destroying her pedicures in an instant, so I have scheduled her a shellac pedi to hopefully get her through a month or more. I wish all winter, but her toe nails grow like crazy! Austin, glad you are back. I have been worrying about you-forgot about the wedding, sorry to hear of the difficulty with mom passing. Proud of the KAW ninja chop on that pastor-good for you! That new man you have mentioned better watch himself!! I am glad you were the one with your mom, a point surely not lost on her. Judy, you are sounding fierce. I may join you in hanging some tuna cans around! Jeanne, you and Coy stay on my mind, hope things are ok. Lisa, your mom is one piece of work and you have made so much progress! And did you notice your thread hit the 2000 mark tonight! Awesome!! Book and Riz, Sharynmarie and everybody else, hope you are doing well. Beanie, welcome, impressed you read the whole thread, we can understand why you might stutter afterwards-it's the twitch effect! I made Halloween into an event w/ mom. She loves little kids (and they her). One day we made lists of words related to Halloween, another added words that rhyme. Next day we made up a funny spooky poem from all those words, inviting our neighbors to trick or treat us, or just stop by for a cup of coffee or visit if no kids. We printed it up and drove around the neighborhood to deliver. Then, I worked on my house, spiffing up and decorating. I had been letting some stuff go that needed to be done (getting over my clutter max) and I found simple chores that mom could do to help. DH got interested, trimmed the shrubs next to the sidewalk, brought colored paper for the invitations, picked out candy, oohed and ahhed about the house! All turned out great! Lots of trick or treaters, (all adorable) and lots of visitors, lots of fun. Did my soul good. After company left, my mom said: "who were those people, and how did they all know my name?" She couldn't remember we sent invitations and signed our names! So cute and sad at the same time. I have been working hard to keep her on a regular routine since I had the meltdown. It is helping but is hard work. She needs continual attention to do well. We have had a visiting kitty. Good for all of us, except we can't have him in the house, DH is allergic. I hate to have an outside pet-so unfair to them. We bought a little house for him and he used it pretty well until it got cold, then no interest. Next we made him a little bed in a clothes basket in the garage, and we leave the door up just a bit, he loves that bed! Comes in every night and purrs and purrs! Today was warm and he got in the bed on the deck today. I sit my mom on a chair near the door, have her hold him on her lap and pet him. Then I use that to get her in the shower or dressed and rid of the kitty-fied bathrobe right away-she doesnt want to make her sil sick! Works pretty well :)) DH had a terrible few weeks and especially bad day on Fri., someone hit a deer that then flew up in the air into his car on his way to work at 5:30 am. Did about $8,000 damage. Same day, I took mom to early vote, went to check on our old house and get mail and discovered it had been broken into, and his garage too. The stole his big tool boxes and lots of tools, cut the batteries out of his collector cars, and completely trashed the old house (his first home, had it since he was about 25). It was heartbreaking to see. Every single thing in house and garage had been ransacked and trashed. He told me they caught the criminals that had been breaking into the business, caught red-handed selling 150k worth of specific metals stolen from another local business. When he saw all the tools missing, he immediately felt like they may have used his tools to break into the business and get out the materials that resulted in their arrest. Today, DH's cousin came by to tell us his home (a few blocks away) had been broken into Fri night, and again Saturday night). He went to stay with his elderly mom overnight both nights because she is sick and widowed. He had lights on and car in driveway, family next door. No one in neighborhood heard or saw anything. Our area has very high unemployment, and crime is up-to say the least. Whew-that's what's up around here. If I missed you individually, I apologize, and love you all, bunches! Have a good week, if you can. I am celebrating that the political ads will finally be over! Hugs and moments of joy! Kimbee
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Haha! Jessie! - I've got wide feet. My mother says that they're grape stompers. My brother says they're duck feet. I'm proud of my ugly feet too. They look just like my Nona's, and I loved her insanely. She was the nice grandmother. I had a vile one and a nice one! I just don't want dry feet and gnarly nails in flip flops . Maybe I should've said "cave man feet" and not Barney Rubble! We like our ugly dogs.
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Hey, I'm that woman with Barney Rubble feet. :) A friend once told me I had the ugliest feet. "They're square." I told her they were great for working in swamps and I probably could walk on snow. Proud of my ugly feet. :-D
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Shellac is definitely the way to go with manicures.... except, that its hard to get the shellac nail polish off yourself. But, the paint lasts for weeks once its on. No chipping. I get it done whenever I have a manicure, which is only a few times a year. My thing is pedicures. I wear flip flops for most of the year, really. From probably March to, well, now. I'm still wearing flops because its still hot. Its going to be 90 again tomorrow. So, I have pedicures pretty frequently. I don't want to be that woman who has the Barney Rubble feet.
Do the shellac, Punch. Just once, and you'll be hooked. My neighbor bought a UV thing so that she can do her own. I'm not sure I'm that ambitious.
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Hi all--was super busy over the last 10 days getting ready to go on vaca (and writing to you while on vaca. and on this silly little netbook) and suddenly realized that I stopped getting my follow up emails (which I used to get daily!) - something happened and I'm not rec'd them partic. for this discussion. ARGHH. Even more weird is I just finished polishing my ugly nails and am intrigued with this shellac treatment and having my nails 'done' for weeks. Def. looking into it. Hope all are OK. I'll read up on the thread and see what's new but wanted to let you know I didn't drop out of society here. :) hugs, love, wellness...punch
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Thanks, Joan. Love, Cat
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Working backwards here -
((((((((austin)))))))) YAY for you - way to go!!!! Well done!!!! Boy, a guy like that gives pastors a bad name. Hope you are doing OK now! There is bound to be some let down. Keep in touch - you have much of value to offer.
(((((((((Judy))))))) I buy nail olish for $1.99 from the drug store and do touch ups - but - I hear you!!! Hey, hang the tuna cans and decorate them first! Walmart website - LOL now that got me laughing. Oh my judy, that is quite a picture. Glad you had a nice evening with hubby and the boys. Drink lots of water to flush the salt out, keep taking the deep breaths, don't take sh*t from your mother, light some incense, puty on some uplifting music -you ARE a mighty woman of power, ,jude! The external appearance makes a difference. When Gordie was dying - his last day on earth, I dressed up in a nice outfit, did my hair etc and went to the hospital "armed" as a KAW. I was not having my son go through that major and final transition with me looking a wreck, and falling apart beside him. This was about him not me, and he needed my support. There was lots of time for my tears later. Lots. So I am visualizing you breathing deep, getting yourself together, and powering up -and remembering that no one needs to take abuse! The KAW is behind you! Falcon punches and all ;p
Lisa - Well done - I never thought of the three major transitions that cat has been through - . I did seen some wedding pics on facebook. Amanda is a real beauty and her dress was gorgeous! You have received much support but you have given much too (((((((((((((hugs))))))))) hope things settle down for a while at your end.
cat - thanks - I have some of those gloves too, the latex ones are useless for me. Never mind the arthritis ( I have a little too)- I am sure your nails look fab, and that enhances the whole hand. Yes, start looking after yourself where you are at, and let it grow. The best exercise advice I ever read was "Do more than you are doing now". Everyone can do that, while 30-40 mins 5 times a week may not be do-able.Every little bit counts, and the same with the eating habits. Do what you can today to make your diet healthier. We can only live now. I am so sorry your good neighbour is moving, but glad you have had her, and that she will come back and visit. Rick and Cyn are still in shock and will be for a while. They have much to do now, and time after with you and Warren will be invaluable. After is when it starts getting harder and - around three months usually the shock/numbness has worn off, and the BIG pain sets in. Then 6 months, 9 month (particularly bad), 1 year, and of course all the holidays - Thanksgiving,Christmas , birthdays. They are on an emotional rollercoaster ride, which will last several years, and they will never be the same, I know your heart is hurting for them, as well as your own loss of their child. Be sure to look after you. (((((((hugs)))))
thinking of everyone and hoping for a good day for all. Love hugs, and prayers - Joan
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Austin: Glad you set the preacher straight and got the funeral done.

Judy: I can feel a power surge coming from Arizona. Sending white light to our AZ chapter to go along with the incense.

Lisa: We have been through a lot together on this thread. I appreciate all of you, the support you have given me and the fun things that we have shared.

Love to all, Cat
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I can now say I am a KAW when the preacher did not want to do the funeral due to no power I said to my family-he lives next to the church about 100 feet away he can just suck it up and do the --- funeral it only will take 30 min or less -he can dress warmly-the funeral started on time.
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Joan - no new nighties or nail polish for me this week. Maintaining an apartment in PA, and paying my daughter's rent too has me squeezed a little too tightly this week for extra's. Nails are a wreck, which is sort of indicative of how I've been feeling - just chipped and a bit broken. John just left for another 2 weeks this morning. But, I've taken a deep breath, and am resolved to get my shit together and power up. I may hang some empty tuna cans in the kitchen to remind myself that I am a power woman.

Cat - I agree with Lisa - its great that you'll be with Rick and Cyn after the service. They're keeping busy now with plans and preparations, but after the service, things will be quiet and without you and Warren there, they'll be alone with the emptiness. Maybe your presence there will ease them into it.

Pam! Where's Pam?

Hi, Beanie!

Hi, Book :)

Kimbee... you said you'd be here this weekend. Well?

I'm missing people here. Just can't go back and read to see just who while I comment.

Had sushi with my husband and two of the boys last night. The salt has me blown up like a parade float this morning. Joan, if I got that leopard nighty now, I'd look like I'd belong on that people of Walmart website.

Hope everyone has a good Sunday. I'm going to light some incense and power up. No more candy, no more moping. The AZ branch of the KAW is going to stand tall (and a little wider, but what the heck).
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Cat, I think it's great you'll be with them after the service too. They will need you and Warren so much then. You never cease to amaze me lady. Always thinking ahead, always looking for ways to be better able to help the ones u love. We KAW have been thru 3 major events in your life with you in such a short time. Amanda wedding, (which I'm patiently waiting for those pics of u on face book;), your dads passing, and now your nephew. I know you and Warren will be such a comfort to your family. And u know we KAW are with you in spirit. Love you my friend! Lisa
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Joan, you rock. My dear friend up the road from me gave me a gift certificate for a manicure for my birthday (Feb. 10th, please write it down) and I finally used it in August before Amanda's wedding. WELL, let me tell you I learned a lot. Had a pedicure to go with the manicure, but we used shilac (sp) on my nails. That nail polish stayed on for 3 weeks. My nails were so strong. Love this stuff. Been going back regularly, meaning every three weeks. In the meantime, I am now wearing those gloves when I do housework. Not the puny butt wiping gloves, but the big hasmat gloves that are for real house work. It has been YEARS since my hands looked decent. Got a little arthritis and some knobby joints, but my nails rock, thank you very much. Maybe in time I can do more for my overall condition, but it's a beginning.

Here's the sad news. My dear neighbor, the one who gave me the gift certificate for my birthday, just sold her house. Waaaaaaaaaa!!!!! I am so happy for her, but so sad for me. She is my morning walking partner and has been by my side through all of the stuff with my dad. I love her so much. She has a very spiritual side to her and her words are always a comfort to me. She is so honest with me and I so appreciate that about her.

Judy, you would love her. No way would she want to be a caretaker to parents. Nevertheless, she was to her husband who passed 9 years ago to prostrate cancer. She is such an amazing person and she is moving back to Alaska to be close to her daughter and grandchildren. So she will be far from me, but I know she will come to visit and I guess I just have to be grateful that she was here when I really needed her. She has brought many blessings into my life as have all of you.

The memorial service for Dameron will be next Saturday. As you know, we talk to Rick and Cyn daily. I called yesterday, but it was a bad time. Rick answered the phone and I could tell he was choked up. They were going through family pictures, looking at all the trips and special times they shared together. They were picking photos out for a slide show at the memorial. I can't imagine a harder thing to do. My heart just broke for them.

We talked about when they wanted us to come down. Did they want us to come now or a couple of days before the memorial. They want us to come just before the memorial so we can stay longer afterward. We just need that time together after all their responsibilities have been met. I'd love to be with them now, but I think they are in need of some private time to get things done and share their loss together. The more they process now, in the privacy of their lives, the more they can share when we get there. I'm good with that and remind them daily how much we love them. They know it and feel it. I am so looking forward to putting my arms around them. My husband is with his bother in spirit always. They talked this evening. I think we are joined in a very special way. I'm grateful for that.

Love to everyone, Cat
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Hi all - book - shopping with you would be fun! I agree about self esteem and looking good. Now looking good can be different things to different people - the point in how you feel about yourself. It gives me a boost. Even my nighties are coordinated witrh dressing gowns and were long before G came along.;p
Lisa - it is hilarious that DQ jumped out of bed. I think I understand Doug's concerns about power, but I honestly don't think you need it any more. Distance and detachment are power too - of a different kind. Thank you for the compliments. Got a new haircut and G calls it my young girl haircut -mind you - he was trying to get on the right side of me.;) Like Mary I find dressing up makes me feel better on a bad day.
Judy - falcon punch -OK call it a senior moment -i am entitled - sorry ur brother isn't well, he sounds like such a great guy, I wish there was some way to get Clay's health back too. Haven't heard anything new about him. How are you doing with the nail polish and nighties?
cat - wondering how you are and the grieving parents. Such a sad situation., ((((((hugs)))))
kimbee -so good to hear from you - busy busy I guess. we do miss you when you can't get here -take care of you!
punch, austin, Pam, everyone thinking of you
all's quiet on the western front re mother - doubt it will last, but am making the best of it. had my nails done again - pumpkin with gold flecks - should go well with the blue tights - and going for more stuff next week - I have some free coupons to use up in the next month. Hope I get more for Christmas!
Love and hugs Joan
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Hey, where is everybody?
Kimbee, its good to see you back!
Emjo - the latest on Clay? U got any news?
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Hi KAW, been missin my sistas! We r ok here. Will try to grt on here
Saturday or Sunday. Hope u KAW r staying strong n TOUGH! luve u all, kimbee
And, thx for missing me ;)) !!
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I'm still here, Judy. Talking to Rick and Cyn every day. They called today and the memorial service is set for a week from this Saturday. Giving time for out of state relatives, us included, to make arrangements to be there. The four of us are looking forward to putting arms around each other and having some private time. As a couple, they need a little time to process this loss together. Cynthia has a big family and is bombarded right now. Plus they have their 5 other children to deal with. As couples, I think we are a solid anchor for each other. We know that our time together will be meaningful. We'll talk to them again tomorrow.

Love, Cat
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No search party required. I've been lurking. And, Emjo... its a falcon punch, not jump - how could yo forget? (Better get away from those glue fumes.) Have been in a rut again. Its just a roller coaster. Feel good, feel bad, life is good, life sucks ass. I need some serious brother time. He always makes me feel better. He's not well again though. He has bad weeks and worse weeks, never a week where he's not in pain. Just weeks where he can tolerate it better than others. Yesterday, he looked rough. He's like the cat with 9 lives, only he's on like, maybe 39.

I need to take a lesson from Book and Emjo and start fixing myself up. Been walking around with chipped nail polish and a broken nail since I got back from my trip.

Glad Clay is progressing. Wish there was some way for him to get back to pre-head injury health.

What's the lastest on DQ, Lisa? Is she still at rehab (that is where she was going, right? I can't scroll back to earlier posts without losing this). With the holidays coming up, is she going to be brewing up another storm?

Cat, are you gone yet? Aren't you going to see Rick and Cyn? Sending you love and a big squishy hug.

Jeanne, your on my mind.

Where's Kimbee? Send a search party out for her, Lisa. I'm accounted for! Is there another Kim too?
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