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Tonight when staff was done changing mom's diaper, I told her to thank them
She asked what for - I said for cleaning your dirty bottom
So she looked at them, and parroted me word for word
Thank you for cleaning my dirty bottom

We still need to work on her saying it with sincerity
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MsMadge,
What full moon?
What are you tawking about?
Lol.
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Don't feel badly, Send

Blame it on the full moon
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Resourceful s o n!

Meetup tonight to get it all out on the brat thread! Look forward to seeing absentee caregivers and past caregivers regaining their lives, posting here.

Love you all!

I messed up my now frequent appointments this morning, and missed one but rescheduled. I feel really bad that I was so bad in real-life!

Feeling badly.
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An old man living alone in Ireland wanted to plant his potatoes. He sent a message to his son who was in prison for armed robbery asking for help.
The son replied that he could not help but don't plant the potatoes this year that is where i burried the 4 million
At 4 am the next morning a bus load of policemen arrived armed with shovels and began digging in the potato patch.
After a few hours they left empty handed.
The old man was very puzzled and contacted his son.
"Sorry Dad that was the best I could do from here so go plant those d*mn potatoes"
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A sweep is as lucky as lucky can be
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Just wondering WHO is sweeping out the fireplace these days?

Chim chiminy, chim chiminy, chim chim churee........
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You have conjured up my old three little piggies picture book, in it piggie one ran out the back door to piggie two's house, then they both fled to the safety of piggie 3's house. I can vividly recall the picture of the three pushing the cauldron into the fire. Poor wolf.
I believe the wolf in red riding hood met the axe of the rescuing lumberjack, sans pictures of course.
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And having the name Dumbo.

If only the 3 little pigs could fly.

And why was it always Minnie tied to the railroad tracks, and not Mickey?
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Dumbo's mother being locked up with a sign above the bars that said "Mad Elephant" after she'd retaliated against the mean other elephants laughing at him. Far worse than Bambi's mum getting shot off camera.

Ursula the Sea Witch was my role model - "well yes I've had the odd complaint but on the whole I've been a saint - !" What a gal! What an entrepreneur! What a realist!

Dino is furry because he's supposed to be friendly. But if they wanted to make him that friendly perhaps they shouldn't have made him T Rex shaped. Mind you they probably didn't expect literal-minded grandfathers to be left in charge...
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Yes, MsMadge!
Every little girl's fear is that the prince won't find her as she sweeps out the fireplace once again, as her rival step-sisters try on the glass slipper, almost breaking it.

And that, folks, is why we bring home the bacon, fry it up in the pan!
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Ever noticed all Disney movies have something scary or sad about them too
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How could our parents read us such scary stories?

And why did the dino have fur?
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Interesting CM.  The pig story.
Hilarious, the rabbit vs. dino story!
Seems you have the version where there were 3 pigs at the end, building the fire. But the original version has each pig #1 & 2 eaten by the wolf. The version I recall is that they ran to the 3rd pigs house of bricks and survived. My dH recalls the story was read at school, after first claiming he had never heard the story at all.

In later days, we have Mrs. Wolf bringing home the bacon, frying it up in the pan, because she 
is    W. o. m. a. n.!
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Speaking of frightening little children...

I do try not to lap up stories about my ex husband's failings, but this was a classic - Son and DIL were sighing and eye-rolling over it at the weekend. Ex and (lovely) wife were visiting when Son and DIL heard piercing screams coming from the sitting room and rushed in to find 2 year old (today!) granddaughter sobbing over her cuddly toy rabbit and Ex with his hand behind his back looking guilty. They demanded an explanation, and he sheepishly produced the furry glove puppet dinosaur he was holding. It emerged that the play story had gone badly wrong, and no! Dino does NOT have rabbit for dinner!

As Daughter 1 would put it "Daddy, what were you *thinking*?"
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Yay I love the Internet! You can see the ad on YouTube - only it's from 1977, which means I shouldn't strictly speaking have been watching it, but too late now.
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That wasn't the end, Send! The end was that poor Mr Wolf tried to get in the house by going down the chimney, and the wicked pigs built a fire and put a cauldron on it so that he was boiled alive!

There was a long running ad. campaign for Heineken beer that had the strapline "refreshes the parts that other beers cannot reach"; and back in the '80s one of the series featured a cartoon that opened with Mr Wolf exhausted and panting as he tried to blow down the brick house. He reaches for his Heineken, glugs it down, rolls up his sleeves and blasts the house to pieces - "thereby enabling Mr Wolf to bring home the bacon to Mrs Wolf" as the voiceover explained.

There were complaints to the Advertising Standards Association and it got withdrawn.
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So, not remembering the ending of the fable, "The 3 little pigs", I found it very sad.
3rd pig built his house of bricks, and the big bad wolf could not huff and puff and blow his house down, not even by the hairs of his chinny chin chin. The end.

Everybody already plucked their chin hairs anyway, right?
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Disclaimer
At a loss here on how to proceed with respect for American Indigenous Peoples.
On one hand, there are cowboy movies still showing on t.v.
On the other hand, I must apologize for calling the other actors "Indians".
So now I am sorry for making a joke at all.
Maybe I should have said: Cowboys and other peoples on horseback.
However, I am sure the truth was never shown in the movies anyway, and these were actors, afterall.
How sorry is that?
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Ali, I find other cultures very interesting too.Through our church,we had a foreign exchange student from Helsinki,Finland live with us for a year when I was 10.One night at dinner,Mother was serving corn and R. said"Suey,suey,Corn is for pigs".They don't eat corn over there because I guess it's for pigs and another time,he was crying and my Father asked him what was wrong and he said"I want my wodka!" and it turned out he missed his Vodka because I guess as soon as you can reach the bottle over there,you can have it.He even showed us how they take a real sauna there and when he went home,he sent us chocolate with Finnish cloudberries in it.I learned a lot that year and have so many good memories from it and my Finnish "brother" and I still correspond today.
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I went back and read again... it's Japanese words written in English characters?
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The native language is Chamorro, right? I didn't think you knew very much of it, Book. Seems I remember you saying that. Are the words you and Madge are typing, are they Chamorro or Japanese? I could maybe put them into a translator and find out, but I'm just curious.

I remember back in Los Angeles, I interviewed for a local office of a company that was a Japanese company. They seemed... surprised at me. Like they didn't understand how a woman would be their sales person. But, they gave me the interview, and I think I flubbed it, anyway. I liked the idea of the job because I wanted a reason to learn some conversational Japanese lol. I have a friend who lives in Japan now. He says if I want to teach English there, he could help me get a job. I find the idea of immersing in another culture very interesting. Life is short: why not live in multiple cultures? Much easier said than done, of course!
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Madge san,

Ohayoo! Hai, genki desu. Sore wa 8:30am de aru. Anata wa?
Watashi wa yoi hi o sugosu koto nozomu!

ABB, I know practically nothing about my native language. We grew up speaking only in English. My dad, in his old age, was reverting back to his native tongue. Several times, we had major communication problems. He was forgetting English. I don't understand our language at all (very similar to Spanish). However, he was stationed in Japan and Germany. So sometimes, he would talk to me in those languages. I took Japanese classes in high school, majored it in college. I understand Japanese more than my native one... so dad and I would talk broken Japanese when he forgot English.

He would say jokingly about his body's itchiness (using a play on words): I'm very 'ITCHY-ni-san-shi-go'
(The Japanese count Ichi, Ni, San, Shi, Go, Roku, Nana, Hachi, ...)
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I was talking with Send and I told her my husband's back went out and he was watching Cowboys and Indians in his underpants and she asked me what the Cowboys and Indians were doing in his underpants.......
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Now, the second little piggy said: "Not by the hairs of my chiny chin chin" also.
His house was made of sticks. (would never have lasted the winter!).
He was also eaten by the big bad wolf.
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Autumn in my Heart as I pluck my chin hairs!!
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Gershun,
It's okay...MsMadge is often speaking in another language, I understand!

Please don't say anything about a hat covering chin hairs....everybody knows where the chin hairs are. She will come around ok, once the smoke clears. Lol.

As for me....I lost my tweezers again...scissors, hair brush, vitamins, but they will show up by the time I really need them!
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Sharyn,
There is no evidence of Autumn here.
Let's ask Cwillie!

"Oh it's going to be a long, lonely summer"!
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Uh oh. Last time the smoke was this bad, we evacuated to the beach so we could breathe. The smoke comes inside-a small brushfire nearby has made the smoke dense, thick, really gray, mostly from the LaTuna fire. Will decide in 8-12 hours after the small fire is out and that smoke clears.

Unfortunately, the holiday has all the hotels full.

Hubs is at work.

I am juicing organic celery, eating blueberries.
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I saw where the air quality was bad in SoCal. We still have some haze here too pulling chin hairs is a good past time!!

It's 100 here and 112 in my hometown in California.  Is Autumn coming soon?
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