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My DD;s baby shower is tomorrow, here, and boy have things changed!! Which I was aware of because my bonus DD had hers 4 weeks ago! Same group of lifelong friends, and they are doing all the work. I really only had to get the house cleaned and some furniture rearraigned and tables set up. Oh yes, and pass out money for the "catered food and desserts". But I will admit it is way easier to do it this way for 35 people! These gals are all mid/late 30s with great jobs, but I remember when you just had it at a friends/families house with home made food! They are crazy close, and it should be alot of fun, they were in and out today dropping stuff off and will be here early to set up. So far I have seen bags of balloons, a case of champagne!, boxes of sweets from a local bakery. They are making virgin drinks for the preggo gal and the non drinkers, I am thanking God that if she gets married she wants a destination wedding and we are off the hook for that planning!! wish me luck!!
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To many people up here a solar storm isn't worrisome, it means an aurora alert even down to southern Ontario (very, very rare)
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Solar storms can be dangerous to our technologies
When a coronal mass ejection, or CME, strikes Earth’s atmosphere, it causes a temporary disturbance of the Earth’s magnetic field. The storm on the sun causes a type of storm on the Earth, known as a geomagnetic storm.
The most powerful solar storms send coronal mass ejections (CMEs), containing charged particles, into space. If Earth happens to be in the path of a CME, the charged particles can slam into our atmosphere, disrupt satellites in orbit and even cause them to fail, and bathe high-flying airplanes with radiation. They can disrupt telecommunications and navigation systems. They have the potential to affect power grids and have been known to black out entire cities, even entire regions.

But we are okay.
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The man who runs the spaceweathernews website is heading to the store for supplies, after reporting 4 CME's on the sun this morning. This does not mean it is the end of earth. Data source is NASA.

The CME's/Solar Storms are headed towards earth.

Notice-he is going to the store, so expects to get through this solar event alive, no worries, Lol.

My husband tells me these things when I am not feeling well, and already having an unexplained episode of something. He does this not to scare me, because it reassures me somewhat knowing there could be a scientific cause for my feeling really bad and cannot sleep or think straight.
Thus, no meds needed, just resting, using the T.V. for distraction, rest, food.

I had a small bit of tomato soup, plopped a slice of Deluxe American Cheese slice into the hot soup, ate a roll with it. Same tastes as a grilled cheese and tomato soup - comfort food!

I just shared this in case you all are feeling a bit strange or shaky.
Are you okay?

Yes, you are.

CME = Coronal Mass Ejection
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for those going through a very hard time:

take this good luck with you!
🍀🍀🍀🍀🌸🌸🌸🌸
just keep going! you’ll get there. one step after another.
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I am considering doing martial arts once I move. This is an idea I have batted around for years. I know most who take martial arts are younger, but I like the idea a lot and was once told I had good upper body strength.
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Fantasy, boj, fantasy!

venting - good one!
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I like this advice:

Can’t let my enemies do better than me.
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🌸🌸🍀🍀🌸🌸🍀🍀
don’t take this seriously. it’s meant as a joke. it made me laugh when i read it.

someone asked, what to do when everything in life’s just going wrong. someone answered:

are you open to delusion? reality can be so pessimistic.
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today's positive message:
🌼🌼🍀🍀🌼🌼🍀🍀

be proud of what you have done. then go and do better.
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I began training my dogs to be comfortable with the crate for flying two days ago. It is going alright. I am using treats and praise and increasing time they are inside the crate. They are zipped up next to my recliner while I watch TV for about five minutes. I then praise and treat. If they sniff or go into any part of the crate on their own, I praise and give them a little treat. We are also practicing carrying them short distances. It has been going alright. I get a little whining here and there but not howling. I still have three weeks, so little by little we will work on it.
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today's positive message:
🌼🌼🍀🍀🌼🌼🍀🍀

to cheer yourself up, picture a T-rex trying to make a bed.
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today's positive message:
🌸🌸🍀🍀🌸🌸🍀🍀

love yourself very much.
and accept the love of others.
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Anxiety,

Yay! I will private message you with my email address. Please feel free to send me a message if you have any questions about our city.
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My plane will arrive at 11:55 am Monday! 😁
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Yeah, me too. My favorite place to hear jazz in our city is Snug Harbor on Frenchmen St.

I will be in the jazz tent this Sunday at our Jazz and Heritage Festival.
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NHWM!
Now I have to go to New Orleans, I love Jazz, French influences.
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Eva,

I love him too. He’s 80 and still rocking out! He loves New Orleans! They all do. We are a big music town.

You’re right, he definitely still has a ‘bad boy’ persona! He trashed our governor! LOL 😆 The governor texted back saying, “You can’t always get what you want!”

Too funny! This strait laced conservative politician quoting a line from Mick’s song!
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NHWM,
Love Mick! How he maintains that bad boy image!
Not so much Rolling Stones, never liked their songs that much except for one,
“ lI'll never be your beast of burden
Yeah
I don't need no beast of burden
I need no fussing
I need no nursing
Never, never, never, never, never, never, never be”
I think all of us caregivers will never want to be burden or beast. Never!
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BoJ
love it!
My quote,
Stop being OK with things you are not OK with.
Stop associating being a good person with how much you are willing to suffer in silence.
You can be a kind person and still say “I am not OK with this”.
Being kind is not being human equivalent of a doormat!
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i’ve quoted this several times, but it’s always worth repeating:
🌸🌸🍀🍀🌸🌸🍀🍀

“Before you diagnose yourself with depression or low self-esteem, first make sure that you are not, in fact, just surrounded by a**holes.”
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The Rolling Stones are at jazz fest. Mick is 80! I have seen them before and not going to see them today. Was watching the news and people from all over the world will be at the fest to see The Stones.

I have tickets for Sunday. I would like to see Mick sing Time is on our Side with Irma Thomas, our own queen of soul! Mick loves her recording of that song and asked her to sing it with him. Oh gosh, I have seen Irma perform a million times, love her!
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Positive quote of the day:

“What if it all works out?”
🍀🍀🌸🌸🍀🍀🌸🌸
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I have to agree that distance helps.

Many years ago in the Joann May and Ladee era, a caregiver asked the question, "Why is it me, of all my 6 siblings, who has the responsibility of looking after our mother?" She specified that she didn't want anyone to answer who didn't have a batch of siblings.

I, who have only one sibling, answered any, because I knew the answer

which is:

"Because you were available."

I have seen time and again that those who don't want to care give are unavailable - for one reason or another. I have seen my sister back off of doing the simplest things for our Borderline Personality Disordered mother as she wanted to make it clear that she wasn't going to help. Mother got the message and moved closer to me.

But there was still nearly 300 miles between us, and I maintained that, and it made a positive difference to me. My plan for myself was to move to her area, but only after she was gone. I knew if I was closer I would have been hounded to do this and that. As it was, one year for my birthday present she gave me a season ticket to the symphony concerts in Edmonton, so (in her plan), I would drive 300 miles to take her to the concerts. Didn't happen!!! Mother found other people to go to the concerts with.

If you need to, become less available to your senior LO. That also means you are more available to yourself.
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Have a great visit Alva!
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Here's what happened to me: always had a very difficult relationship with my mother (she definitely has some undiagnosed/untreated mental health issues), so when my husband & I bought our first house 35 years ago, we moved 45 minutes away to put some distance between us. (My father had already died.) So, 20 years ago, when my mother decided to downsize from her house, she - without asking - bought a condo 10 minutes away from us.

The only good thing is I've had a lot less driving on my trips to help than I would have if she hadn't moved. However, I would love to move 1000 miles away, if I could.
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Alva, enjoy your trip!! 🤩

Those books, they are in the brave battle stories section, right? Or maybe the horror section 😬
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My DD lives three states away from me. I will be going there for a month soon. However, it occurs to me that were she RIGHT HERE, how much more I would depend upon her. My last breast cancer dx. I was quite anxious. Would have loved her at my side for appointments. Just yesterday it took me the usual crazy amount of time to make reservations when the site wouldn't recognize my passwords and there were cash vouchers locked away in Alaska Air's site under my name. DD is a computer wiz compared to me. Would I not say "drop by".
And thus slowly slowly we lose our abilities to act for ourselves, and we depend on those wanting to help us.
Little by little this creeps up. Soon we are being enabled not to make decisions we should be making about moving to more safety, hiring more help and so on.
I miss being able to see my beloved gal more, but we are daily in touch, and she gets to live her own life. I think we treasure our month time together all the more. And I maintain independence it's important to keep as long as possible.
It's just how I see it.
Recently I read MotherLode where Gretchen Staebler returns home to care for aging mom who then lives to over 100. Now reading LadySitting by Lorene Cary. Yup, mom is 100. My friend Di, with all her own physical problems had mom in same town to age 98.
I repeat that it seems to me that more and more we are killing off our own kids. It is really difficult to keep a needed distance. So it just kind of slowly "happens"......
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Absolutely! Move 4 hours drive away was what a Councellor told me. Too far for their 'beck & call' requests, too far for day trips. It puts a physical barrier between you.

My Aunt used to help her MIL. A little help. A little shopping.

Years went on & the chores snowballed. MIL was losing independance & needed to change her life. Downsize, move to IL/AL or arrange home help. Would not.

This ate up mt Aunt's life. She sought advice & was told to say no to some of it. She experienced awful pressure.

Did MIL's actual (adult) children then step up? No.
They ganged up & increased the pressure on my Aunt (the daughter-in-law) to do everything. To keep being at 'beck & call', the shopper, driver etc. Awful pressure coming from many sides.

My Aunt left town.
She began to live her own life again.

** With her not there, her MIL was FORCED to accept other help **
This is for you Sherry!
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Sherry, this is about the third time today I want to recommend to our OPs that they move 1,000 miles away from family.
If you cannot extricate yourself from participating in this rather toxic situation there really isn't any way that we, a panel of absolute strangers, could help you.
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