My Mom is 78 has dementia and she lives in NJ I was running from Phila to NJ for 3years. My daughter is 23 started living with my Dad and Mom about 2years ago my Dad passed last April and since then my Mom has been getting worse. Im trying to get her into an assisted living place but all she has is a house. I don't think I should sell it becouse 1) it will take to long and 2 she won't get what it is worth and I need every penny. I think if I put my name on the deed. I dont know Im so confused!
My wife's' sister ( who favors selling the house, instead of renting for support income) contacted MIL estate lawyer who said the daughters could not rent or sell the house , but had to leave it vacant. Lawyer also said my wife should not have sold the cabin owned 50/50 by wife and MIL.
MIL needs cash flow for the B&C...
Seems it is in best interest of MIL to rent house for income ( and to pay for the approximate $ 15,000.00 in rehab costs I put up..
Any ideas on these matters? The legality of renting for MIL support? MIL has a Living trust, and daughters are the assigned trustees, if needed. MIL is 'slightly' slowing down, but is aware off most stuff, but does sometimes forget recent events, though long ago stuff is very clear in her mind.
Bob
Your message sounds like a scam. How does Your program provide multiple medical professionals just for her as well as an income?
If yes, curious how a reversed mortgage would pay for the high cost of professional caregivers at home around the clock, or even the cost of the monthly payment for Assisted Living. Just wondering.
I currently pay $104.90 to Medicare each month & and will be receiving $ 640. from SS. ( but not for another year ) Husband receives $131. disability from the VA plus medical care through them so he does not have to pay anything to Medicare. He will be receiving $954. SS. That leaves us with $1620. a month to live on & cannot qualify for food stamps or any other assistance because we have too much in "assets". Our assets are what was described above. No savings, CD's, pensions, retirement funds, no insurance other than homeowners & auto. So you are saying it is fair to require people like us to divest (get rid of) everything we have worked all our lives to aquire to be able to have heat, elect., & food. assistance. Oh and have to live in a small apt where we cannot augment our meager supplys of food by having fresh & canned or preserved foods.
I am tired of so many people & agencies having a one size fits all mentality about help & aging in place. Our senior population worked hard & are now left to be beggers of the ones we helped... including in all too many cases family.
Please talk to your area agency on aging about the options available. It is about money, and you may not be able to get mom into your first choice of care centers, but that doesn't mean you can't find a suitable place for her.
NO it is not that I want the house the thing is I am not look for the state to pay for anything the ALF is private pay. I do not want her to go into a state founded place because the stink.
I am trying to get the house to work for her financially.
Thank you for your comment
thank you so much. I did get a lawyer last year he did all my Moms paper work my daughter has a contract, like you she quit her job to care for my Mom. The ALF I am looking at dose not take medicaid it is all private pay. I like this place because it is very close to were I live and the people who work there a very caring. and they have a memory care unit. This has got to be the hardest thing I have ever done in my life I know I will putting money out to help her and that is fine I just need the house to help. I guess I will call that lawyer that I spoke to last year mybe he won't charge me for this one sense he took 4000.00 last year for the paper work.
Thank you for you help and good luck today
In my Mom's case, she did a life estate and deeded her property to me; the life estate means that she could live in the house as long as she wanted. Ownership of the property transfered to me in small increments each year. She did this 14 years ago so the state medicaid specialists did some calculation that indicates she owns 30% of it and I own 70% of it. The state placed a lien on it UP TO 30% of the value of the home or $32,000. If we sell BEFORE Mom dies, we must pay the state $32,000. If we wait until Mom passes away - then the property becomes 100% mine upon her death and the state gets nothing. If Mom did this within 7 years of the medicaid application - I would get NO ownership; the life estate would be null and void but she did it long before the 7 year look back. Do not assume this will work in your state. You are wisest to see an elder or family law attorney to find out what's possible.
My Mom's money is all gone too - so I do what I can for her. She doesn't have a lot but she is well cared for and content. I don't see her daily because I work. And I work so that I can help provide her with clothes, a newspaper subscription and pay the property taxes on her house as well as my own living expenses. She isn't living at the taj mahal but she's in a nice facility where the aides are caring, kind and well trained. I hope you can find a well balanced solution that is good for your Mom and easy for you to live with as well.
Remember to take care of yourself as you go through this process. If you want more advice, please look on my blog - totally for help only - not commercial. I have a page about moving into assisted living that might provide you with some helpful ideas. You can link to my blog from my profile here on agingcare.com.
Best of luck!!! Your Mom is lucky to have a caring daughter and grand daughter!!