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I think that you are doing the correct thing by doing nothing. Let the hospital social services provide transport for her to a memory care facility they choose. You and your husband cannot take care of her or be forced into it. Don’t fall for their pressures. She is a danger to others and herself. You have so much to manage with your and your husband’s health. Sending prayers for the entire situation.
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You have my prayers. Call your local American Bar Association, they can help find you a pro-bono attorney to help you. Pro Bono means they offer legal services at no charge. You sound as though you're caught between a rock and a hard place, and I feel for you. People in her condition can sometimes have extraordinary strength, so if she comes back to your home, be aware of her location at all times. Blessings, Jazzy
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Do not allow yourself to be drawn into this situation, not even for a transfer.

No, you are not committing a crime, the APS is by not arranging for her transfer to much needed facility care.

Stand firm.
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It would be nice if the OP updated. Its been 2 wks. This problem has to have been solved by now.
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AlvaDeer Dec 11, 2023
Ah, Tim.
How sad.
I hope you'll remain to advise our OPs as they write in questions.
(Perhaps we can thereby move the meter up to a buck-fifty?)

If you notice, there is a whole lot of advice on this thread. And our OP for some reason chose from the beginning not to participate or to answer many questions. This happens on Forum likely 40% of the time. It's never good that, as it gets us talking to ourselves and one another instead of our OPs.

The truth is that CannotContinue got a whole lot of answers, including your own. Including the advice that an attorney in the OP's area be consulted. So she/he had lots to choose from.
That's what the Forum is about. And that's why some of us love it.

Stay and help our OPs. Leave, if you prefer. The choice is yours unless and until the admins decide this is perhaps not the best place for you to contribute advice.
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