For the past year, Mom’s been exhibiting signs of dementia. I was extremely concerned. I pushed and pushed for my father to take her to a doctor. After months of pushing and offering my help, he took her. She has since seen two neurologists, done several brain scans, had blood drawn, and taken the MOCA test. Both neurologist have recommended a psychologist. She has “good” days where she’s perfectly normal, but most days she repeats herself and (I feel pretends) to forget grandchild's name, won’t cook, won’t clean, and does mannerisms someone would expect of an Alzheimer’s person.
My gut tells me she’s faking. It’s so incredibly infuriating. Are the neurologists saying, without actually saying, that she’s faking it? Am I crazy? Should I treat this as an actual disease in case something is really wrong?
Ps. She’s always exhibited “needy” tendencies and issues with control. This only exacerbates my suspicions.
What??? That is no diagnosis, that is a brush off. Somebody needs to ask - what does that mean? If they feel she is faking then they need to say that too, no hedging! Why a psychologist? If mental illness was suspected then surely a psychiatrist would be more appropriate?
If she's failing cognitive tests then there is a reason for it and it needs to be addressed for her sake as well as yours, then a plan needs to be made that doesn't include you becoming her caregiver for the foreseeable future.
Fronto-temporal Lobe Dementia? It seems to strike younger people but probably very hard to diagnise early on.
If the Neurologist cannot find anything physical I suppose the Psychiatrist is next - to look at mental health.
Won't cook or clean could be depression? Or Adjustment Disorder? (Adjusting to being an empty nester). Dependant Personality traits or even disorder?
It may take a while for a correct diagnosis but it does sound like something is not right. Trust your instincts.