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My mother saved every penny my brother payed her for rent for 8 years @ 600 a month which is 57,600$ and she never touched the money, well I live in Las Vegas and they live in cathedral city california, so when my mom was put into hospice, my sister flew down to get power of attny, which my mom would have never wanted but my sister coerced her into signing, and then she told my mom that she could bring her to her house and get her a nurse so my mom told her about the money box and to get it and pay for the nurse and my sister got it, told my brother that they would all sit down together and count it, that never happened, my mom was calling me begging me to come and get her and take my sister off as trustee that she was robbing her blind, my sister has never given us any copies of any trust, she stole my moms jewelry, and never got her a nurse saying that my mom had no money but my brother who lived with my mom, knew for a fact that she had that money saved in that box, she kept it in my brothers closet. Now she has ghosted both of us since we have confronted her about it. what can i do?

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"...i feel horrible that i trusted her and she let my mom die in that shithole instead of at her own home."

I understand now that your Mom has passed. I'm so sorry for this terrible loss in such a terrible way.

I don't know if there's anything you can do on your Mom's behalf at this point except to have a consultation with an attorney. One hard truth to remember is that your Mom is the one who assigned this daughter as her Trustee, and also the one who chose a sketchy way to store her cash. This doesn't excuse your sister IF she did indeed steal the money, but your Mom made it easy to happen.

You don't mention how long ago your Mom passed, but if your sister is the Trustee, and maybe even the Executor, it will take some time before the Will gets executed. So, maybe? she's not ghosting people but working on getting things in order? Trusts can be complicated...

May your receive answers and satisfaction, and peace in your heart during your season of grief.
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We are only getting your (and your Mom's) side of the story so really can't give you any useful guidance.

I can't get past that a person in this day and age is storing money in a box rather than a bank account. That was unwise from the start, and there's no real way to prove that money was ever in there or even how much.

Are you sure your sister didn't take it and put it in the trust? Sometimes when seniors age and have cognitive decline they confabulate (make up things up out of whole cloth) or don't get all their facts straight. They also can have bouts of paranoia. Age-related paranoia themes are often about theft and trying to put them away in a nursing home. My Mom is starting in with this every few weeks now. She'll even sometimes tell this to neighbors, much to my dismay.

You live in Las Vegas. Have YOU ever seen this cash? I don't know how anyone can keep someone accountable for something that cannot be proven they did. Maybe she is ghosting you because the accusation isn't true and she is already working as a Trustee and doesn't need people's distrust, especially if your Mom is 100% convinced she stole it.

There is no fix for this except to hope that IF there was cash and IF the trustee sister took it, she did so to put it in the trust for your Mom.
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fairygirl17 Nov 25, 2024
ok well the whole story is my brother lives with my mom and he pays her 600 a month rent and she always put it in the money box for 8 years now, it was kept in my brothers closet, and there is proof that it existed because my sister told my brother that they would count the contents of the box with my mother, that never happened and so then when she was questioned about it she said she counted it with my mom and she video taped it but still i have yet to see any of this, she claims that there was 9,800 in the box and that she was going to pay herself because of all the work she did making herself the trustee, my mom did not want that, she has always been a selfish girl, driven by money, so when my mom found out that all the money was gone and my sister was not going to pay for the nurse my mom told whomever would listen that her daughter was stealing her money, my sister got mad and called her all kinds of names and left my mom in the skilled nursing crying. My mom wanted me to come there and take her back with me because she knew my sister stole her money. There is proof of the money my brother has signed receipts from my mother, and she kept a tally that he has posession of
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You can of course consult an attorney.
I think that you will find, however, that you better have SOLID proof of coercion, of theft, that the money was NOT spent on mom, that the sister DID force an incompetent senior, that the money WAS there. I mean solid proof, not just saying so.
Because that becomes hearsay. That becomes "it was my understanding that" or "Mom told me" and mom is now, you tell us, no longer competent as a witness.

What I am saying here is that I think you have no case.
Sadly.
1. Mother did not, while competent, choose a POA and a second.
2. Mom did not have protection and she put her money in a "box
3. Mom did or did not willingly sign a POA paper, and she is now too incompetent to say which.

So you THINK money was put in a box
And you THINK sister forced mom to sign something
And you THINK every penny went to a nefarious sister who gave no help or care but was there to steal her mother blind.
That's going all to be very difficult to prove.

I think you have no case.
You are free to visit the DA office and you are free to get an attorney to open an investigation, and etc. But know that will all involve expense.

Poor choices were made here. Giving mom 600.00 a month (for what reason) to put in a box was a bad choice. And bad choices have bad consequences sometimes.

Do investigate and get information; I could well be wrong.
In any case, and whatever happens I couldn't be more sorry about it all. It has torn a family to pieces, which seems from reading forum what money tends to do at times.
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fairygirl17 Nov 25, 2024
the money was for rent my brother paid to her, she did not drive and my sister would never give her a ride anywhere so she never deposited any in the bank and my brother has seizures so he does not drive either, the were receipts and a tally kept and the box was kept in my brothers closet, so when my sister lied and told my mom she could come stay at her house and she would hire a private nurse my mom told her to get the box so she could pay for the nurse, but upon finding out how much was in that box her selfishness took over and she told my mom she did not have the money to pay for a nurse, but my mom knew better, she had all her sence she knew what was going on, but my sister is a coniving b***h and led my mom to believe she was going to use the money to hire a nurse, but she did not. My mom begged me to come get her out of that nursing place but my evil sister kept saying well dont come yet, i dont need you here yet. so i trusted her and i did not go and now i feel horrible that i trusted her and she let my mom die in that shithole instead of at her own home.
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