My father's wife passed away several years algo and he went to live with his step daughter in New York. Once his Alzheimer's progressed she put him in a home in Florida. My sister and I asked her to send him to us in puerto Rico but since she has a durable power of attorney she decided to send him to a home in Florida even though my sister and I were willing to have him here in Puerto Rico . After a few months he was evicted from the home because of aggressive behavior. She then brought him to puerto Rico and deposited him in a home and left. She informed me after she left of his new residence via text message. I have been his primary care giver since,about 6 months. My father is a retired military officer and also retried fromt he federal goverment. She pays for the home and has sent me. A total of $300 in that time. Is there any way to revoke her power of atterny? I feel that she gas abandoned him and is using his money for her enjoyment.
I think you have gotten the main thing you wished for your father -- the opportunity to be near him and interact personally with him. Celebrate that!
You also, naturally, want to see his financial resources managed in a way that they will last him as long as possible. Consider that your father lived with your step sister for several years, and that he trusted her sufficiently to give her DPOA. If his behavior was such that he was asked to leave the facility he was in, clearly he needed more care than she could provide. Finding a suitable home for him was responsible of her. Naturally she wanted him somewhere she could visit him.
If Dad was paying her for room and board and care while he was living with her, that was appropriate. Using his money to pay for his care now is appropriate. Giving you money out of his funds for your expenses in caring for him is kind, but not legally required.
Have you asked her for more money to help him in these difficult times?
If possible, maintaining a civil relationship with this woman who has spent years looking after your father would benefit everyone.
In your position, the important thing is to keep in contact with your step sister so that you can raise any concerns about your father's care with her. But as long as she is safeguarding his finances correctly, and as long as she is reimbursing you for any money you have to lay out for him (keep receipts and send them to her), then she isn't doing anything wrong.
I am sorry to hear that you're still struggling with the hurricane aftermath, it must make life extremely difficult and especially for people with hands-on care tasks to do. Have you tried asking your stepsister for help with this specifically? For example, perhaps she could agree to extra sets of clothing and/or bed linen, or laundry services if you can find one that's functioning.
Talk to her! And, by the way, there is absolutely nothing wrong with her paying for the home using his money - that is the correct thing to do.
If your father is competent to change his POA to you (and he wants to), what would improve for him?
BTW, how is your family coping with the aftermath of Hurricane Maria?
I imagine she moved him from Florida to P.R. for two reasons - 1, to make his money last longer, because presumably the fees are considerably cheaper; and 2, so that he could see more of his biological children - isn't that what you wanted in the first place? Those are both excellent reasons. If she is covering your out-of-pocket expenses as well as ensuring that the care home bills are met, what's the problem?
You say your stepsister is paying “the home” but that you are his primary caregiver.
Is your father living in some sort of nursing home and you are visiting and looking after his welfare there?
Or
Is your father living with you but your stepsister is still paying a different place - the place she first put him in Puerto Rico?