We have been taking care of my Husbands 88 year old Grandma for almost 5 years now and We have a 9 year old child. We cant do this anymore.We never get to go anywhere unless it's to get her supplies. She had a Brain stem bleed and a stroke and cant walk. So someone has to be with her at all times. She starts fights with me daily. My daughter is upset all the time because we cant go and do the things her friends are doing. We feel it's time for Her to go to a nursing home, but she refuses to go. What can we do?
These are such complex and emotional issues for us all, we all need to get as much support and information and possible about what we decide to do, or not do at every step of the process, both for our own well being and that of the person/patient we have chosen to look after...
essentially giving in and giving up to your elderly relative's idiosyncrasies, anxieties & fears. Old people are inflexible, don't like change, fear abandonment, crave reassurance.
That's inevitable. Realize that and go on with your life--once you have provided the old ones with a safe, comfortable place....which they will NOT like, at least initially.
Big Hugz to you!
Jam
Only us the caregivers keep us in our own prison.
It may take time but she may warm to the idea. When she sees that there are activities, and the nurses and aids are caring. she may decide it is the best thing.
As I said she is scaired. To many elders this means "the end of the line". make arrangements with the facility to give her a tour. My heart goes out to all of you, but mostly to her as she is feeling this is her last hold out for independence and dignity.
Wishing you a good outcome, and let us know how things are with you.