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I had a big scare this morning. I was napping and I awoke to the smell of smoke. The closer I got to my mom's kitchen the smokier it got. She had put bacon on the burner, sat in her recliner, and fell asleep. We have a smoke detector right above her range and it did not go off. This detector is constantly going off - even if my mom is just boiling water. This time it did not. My biggest fear with my mom is a house fire. We have talked about this several times. She cannot put something on the stove or in the oven and just fall asleep. I have bought her timers to use but she doesn't use them. I made her promise me, today, to never put anything on the stove or in the oven if she is going to sit in her recliner and fall asleep. She did promise but I know this is going to happen again. Other than making sure the smoke detector still works (or why it didn't) are there any other suggestions for alerting her when she left something on the stove too long. Any new devices out there for the protection of the elderly. I live with her but cannot be with her 24/7. Thanks.

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Does mom suffer from dementia? If so, she's unable to "promise" you anything. Disable the stove entirely before she DOES burn the house down!
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Maybe it's time to take the knobs off the stove or disable it in another way when you are not using it (some people have had an electrician install a kill switch).
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She is past that stage of promising you things. You need to live in her reality now which is she can’t manage this part of her life anymore.

We unplugged my MIL’s stove. She can use the microwave.
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MyNameIsTrouble Feb 11, 2024
A word of caution Southernwaver for when they can't use the stove. It might mean they cannot use a microwave either. My MIL blew up her microwave twice before we got her into MC for 24/7care. The first didn't damage the microwave (hotdog cooked for 20 minutes) but the second blew a chunk out of the door edge (coffee reheated for 17 minutes -- exploded the cup). She even continued to use the microwave with it leaking and burned the wall next to it. It gets dangerous in many ways when they lose the concept of time.
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Your mom is basically putting the bacon on to cook and then going back to bed. Yikes.

The stove will have to be disabled. No way around that.

Did she get clear from the UTI?
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Summer, you say she is always tired and falls asleep at the drop of a hat.

When was she last given a good physical? My dad was doing this and it was a medical problem that was treated and the falling asleep was much improved.

He had 70# of water in his system because of CHF and his kidneys were starting to shut down.

Please get her seen by a good doctor(s) and rule out any medical causes for the sleep issue.

One thing I would encourage, put additional alarms in the kitchen but not right over the stove, heat and debris from cooking can ruin them and they don't work. One over every doorway is what the fire department told us. They should be checked and cleaned at least annually, to ensure proper functioning.

I believe that you can now get ones that set all of them off when any one goes off. I think that is a stellar design for fire alarms.
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PLEASE disable the stove!

And watch out for the microwave! Anything that gets nuked that has metal in it can start a fire. And yes, something cooked for 20 minutes will be incinerated and the smell is ghastly.

Doubtful your mom would pull the stove out from the wall and plug it back in.
Worse if the stove is gas....

"talking" to a person with dementia is as helpful as talking to the door. They don't 'get' what you're saying and it's just frustrating.

IME: people show signs of dementia long before they are actually dxed with it. For some reason, Drs seem really hesitant to give that Dx without family member kind of pushing it. My MIL cannot even score a 1 on the BIMS test, yet the person who administered it to her said she was 'mildly' disoriented.

She hasn't been allowed to use the stove in over a year and has burned numerous things in the microwave.
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A smoke detector that works will go off when there’s already a problem. What if mom’s the only one there? She’s at the point of cognitive decline where she’s losing executive function, meaning that she may not be able to figure out what to do when there’s a fire.

This is a good reason to make sure she’s supervised 24/7, but that’s very hard to do at home. Even when a caregiver is in the room, the person with dementia can try the darnedest things. For instance, my loved one tried plugging the wrong end of their phone charger into an electrical outlet. Another walked out the door at 2 a.m. to go to work. I’ve known of people who would put food in the microwave but not use the right setting, and the food caught on fire.

This is why memory care facilities exist.
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NeedHelpWithMom Feb 11, 2024
Hopefully, this woman will be placed as soon as possible, but it the meantime they have to do all they can to prevent a tragedy from occurring.
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The harsh reality is your mother can no longer live alone and you need to figure out what needs to be done.
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First of all, check your batteries on the alarm. Then take off the knobs, remove sharp objects, basically child proof her home.

Have meals delivered to her.

Look into at home caregivers or placement in a facility.
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If you are reluctant to disable the stove you can at least invest in a couple of new smoke alarms and place them where it's most convenient, they don't have to be properly mounted to go off. Of course people without dementia also forget things they are cooking, statistics show kitchen fires are a leading cause of house fires. The problem then is her reluctance to do anything about her lapses, such as never leave the kitchen when cooking or always turn off the stove if she is suddenly called away for any reason, always set a timer, switch to cooking on appliances that have internal timers (my instant pot and counter top oven both turn off after a set time)
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