On Sunday, my brother came up to visit (he lives 4 hours away). My mom was having trouble getting into her wheelchair, he gave her a Tylenol and it seemed a lot easier. Lately, my mom has been frustrated with incontinence, and would scream and have a temper tantrum, that's not going to change. After she calmed down she told me she wants a week at my sisters house to give me a rest. My sisters house is very narrow with lots of bumps and no bed for her. My sister sometimes stays overnight so I can get some uninterrupted sleep.
My niece came over today with her daughter (I made her mask up, I'm not that big an idiot). Before she came, my mom was having the same problem getting from her chair to her commode. I gave her a Tylenol and a half hour later, she did it. My niece and my mom had some serious issues in the past. My niece is a CNA and works in a nursing home. She was very helpful today. My mom asked what they served at the home she works at. My niece told her the truth, breakfast usually sucks, but the lunch and dinner menu caught my mom's attention. My niece showed my mom a picture of a turntable thing she saw one of the residents use. My mom is having a problem with one foot not moving, causing the problem. I have a PT coming sometime this week, and I will certainly ask about it.
My mom asked me to give her great granddaughter a little cash as a gift. As they were leaving my mom asked them to come back another day. I nearly fell on the floor in shock. A visiting nurse is coming back to change her dressing, and I will ask how to better manage her pain. My mom can't be specific as to what hurts, maybe her knees, back, don't know. I'm not sure Tylenol is a long term solution, don't want to mess up her liver.
The thoughtful, considerate mom is who I knew her in the past, nothing like the monster she became when she moved in with me. Maybe it was the pain, maybe it was her awareness she needed to make amends, why not both? Caregiving does have some special moments. When they do come along, please share them with this community. A lot of us feel like we're at the end of hope, I did too. I had only 2 options, try to find solutions and stay positive. The other was to wallow in despair. I choose the former. I really feel hurt inside for those who's situation is not solvable, or who don't have the support from family like I am blessed with. Peace all.
"What’s the safest OTC painkiller for an older parent?
For most older adults, the safest oral OTC painkiller for daily or frequent use is acetaminophen (brand name Tylenol), provided you are careful to not exceed a total dose of 3,000mg per day.
Acetaminophen is usually called paracetamol outside the U.S."
You can google it, try a lower dose so the liver is better off.
Talk to her doctor about pain management. Be mindful that some pain relievers can cause constipation, others the runs in higher doses.
How could you have known if Mom didn't tell you she was having pain. Maybe give her a couple of Tylenol when she gets up. You need to be careful with it though, it is known to cause liver problems. My Mom got her Tylenol when needed.