I just took my mother home from the NH rehab where she has been for a month..She has AD which was diagnosed in Feb. this year, but had progressed rapidly. She is now wheelchair bound and needs 24 care/supervision. Since coming home 3 days ago, she has been very abusive, combative and very aggressive. Will not take her medications or eat when she needs to. Only if she wants to at that time. She as been nodding off all day, and up all night...climbing out of bed that has rails...she has fallen several times and it is very difficult to get her up. She is mean and nasty to me and my husband...sometimes the kids. I am exhausted and tearful constantly...I have given up everything to take care of her...we will not qualify for Medicaid to put her in NH permanently because she was ok up until a year ago and the "spend-down" was not done correctly and she will be disqualified. Please help me.
Trying to establish a routine is a good idea but in the meantime have you considered a memory care unit in a nursing home? "Memory Care" is such a sweet term for dementia and/or Alzheimer's unit. Behavior such as your mom's is their specialty. Some facilities offer respite care for family. This would not help in getting your mom into a routine but it sounds like right now you're in survival mode and need help.
Until you figure it out do what angel suggests and walk away. Remember doing that when our kids were little and throwing a tantrum? If your mom can't get at anything that would hurt her just walk away, go into another room, and leave her be.