Everyone that has tried to help her, she is mean and accuses them of stealing or doing her wrong. There is only her caregiver and me. What should I tell her when she says her family doesn't love her? She is also having terrible nightmares and when she wakes up even though she knows it's not real, she is mean and argumentative. What can be done? She has taken aricept. Any other drug that would help?
charlotte
I agree less meds are better. I prefer natural remedies over big pharma (80% of prescription medication (as well as OTC) are made in China and India).
Sorry about these problems with your mom. Did you ever made the trip to Utah to find out what is going on? Was your mom diagnosed by a doctor?
Also, what was your mom's personality like before she became sick?
It's possible that the medicine she is taking is giving her bad side effects. If I were her caregiver I would take her off this medicine and see if her mood improves. More drugs are not always the best answer. Sometimes less is more.
That said, accepting when our parent or loved one has dementia or any other illness is not easy. Acceptance is the first step in helping another. When I realized my mother was showing signs of dementia I sold her house and moved her in with me (it was a long distance trip and it was not easy but I felt it was necessary). My mom is so grateful and appreciative that I did this for her.
I wish you the best of luck, Jenna
My LO worried and cried a lot shortly after she was diagnosed. Her dementia was pretty severe, even then. She worried about me, my mom and her cat A LOT. She was deluded to think that her cat could escape from the house through a crevice the size of a pea. Nothing would comfort her, but, she was prescribed a daily med for anxiety and depression and it was a GREAT relief to her. Later, she was prescribed a small dose of a sleep aid as well that really helped. I hope that you can find something to help her feel better.
I'm dealing with the same issue with my mom who is 80. right now it's mostly my sister who takes care of her but we battle with not only what you're dealing with but constant verbal abuse. I know the time will come when our sanity and overall health will take precedent but for now we deal with it day by day.
Please remember that we serve a very loving God. He wants the best for us but he also allows things to happen for his glory. I suggest you get into a personal relationship with our Lord and pray to him on a daily basis. You will see and feel God's comforting hands all over you. Hang in there and God Bless you.
My suggestion is to read many different threads and articles here, find a caregiver support group and read "The 36 Hour Day". The more you learn, the more prepared you will be. Not everything will become a crisis.
If there is a private caregiver you are required to withhold taxes, social security, workmans comp, and all. You need a caregiver agreement if this is not an agency. See an elder law attorney for advice on what needs to be taken care of.