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I had moved to another state by the time he became ill & I didn’t witness it.

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I wish you had mentioned your age. I am 72 and my husbands favorite thing to say now "is I worry about you" He is 75 and I have been coming back at him saying the same thing but then he is almost deaf, which doesn't help.

There is age decline after 70, I just read. A little before. Go to the doctor he will run labs. It could be just your numbers are low/high in certain things. Like potassium. Maybe your B12 is low. Thyroid effects a lot of things. In the early stage Dementia will be hard to detect so I may not worry about testing for that right away.

Dementia itself I don't think is hereditary. It comes from lifestyle. Smoking, a brain injury, high cholesterol, heart desease. Alzheimers is hereditary. It runs in my Dads family. Presents itself when they are in their mid 70s. My grandmother had it as did her sister. Both had children with it. ALZ, though placed under the Dementia umbrella, effects the brain differently. Out of my grandmothers 8 children, 2 had ALZ. The rest died before the symptoms would have shown up. So far none of my grandmothers grands have shown signs as of yet. Besides me, only one other cousin is 70.

COVID has made us homebodies. Maybe time to get out and exercise eat better.
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Geaton777 Apr 2022
Please read the Mayo Clinic's take on dementia. It can be inherited. Good diet and exercise are helpful but do not prevent it:

https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/dementia/symptoms-causes/syc-20352013

My own 2 elderly aunts are the perfect example: ages 100 and 102.5. They never married nor had children and lived together all but 2 years of their lives. Even worked in the same company and retired from that company within 2 years of each other. Same schedules, same friends, same exact diet, same hobbies, neither ever had a TBI, concussion, addiction, or profound medical problem. They still live in the same house together. So technically neither of them should have developed dementia.

Yet the 100-yr old one had the onset of dementia about 15-ish years ago and now is in the advanced stages. The 102.5-yr old manages her own affairs, is mobile, still has no profound health issues and reads the WSJ every morning (I purchase the subscription for her). I grew up with them as a child so saw it first hand for my first 20 years of life. We all ate the same Italian/Mediterranean diet growing up and they still do.

I have visited them at least once a year since I moved out of state. I'm DPoA for both of them, and I can verify the accuracy of this information. I was just down there this past March.

I do think one can make terrible choices in their lives and thus speed up the beginning of the dementia that they were destined to have. I think living wisely can delay it, but won't prevent it if genetic. People are living so much longer now but not necessarily living lives of quality and wisdom. That's why dementia will be an epidemic for the Boomers.
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For your peace if mind, most people who develop Alzheimer's dementia never worried about getting it, and when they finally got it, they weren't even aware of it (anosognosia). Some decline on cognitive functions is normal as we age, becase the brain also ages along. In Alzheimer's the loss of cognitive functions is rapid, severe and it's accompanied by the loss of other mental functions as well. Your daughter might have been deeply affected by her father's dementia and she worries that you will be next. She is biased. Alzheimer's is not contagious and not every old person will get it. Request a neuro-psychological test to show your daughter that she is wrong and also for your peace of mind.
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Medical testing.
See your own doctor. Tell him what concerns your daughter (ask for a list) and what concerns you. Tell him your history. Ask for referral to a neuro-psyc doctor and try just to have "fun" with the testing. This gives you your baseline.
The fact that you are willing to explore this puts you on the end of the continuum that is "good" because most in early dementia already fear something is wrong and they dive straight into "denial".
So get tested. My brother, after an accident, was diagnosed with probably early Lewy's Dementia. He had symptoms and knew "something" was wrong. I was just starting to question some things but we were phone distance away, one at each end of our long state. After his accident while in hospital he was diagnosed by symptoms only. He sold his last small home and we got him safe with me as POA and Trustee of his trust and we got him in a wonderful ALF. He always said "I am not happy to know what's coming for me but I AM happy to know there is a real reason for how differently I now start to see the world.
Best to you. I hope you will update us. Stay with us when you have questions. Will be thinking about you.
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I wouldn't rely on anything but medical tests, as others have suggested.  

Some years ago a good friend commented on the stress and confusion she was experiencing, observating that "I meet myself coming and going."    Did she have dementia?  No, she was working full time, going to law school 4 nights a week, and had a busy schedule.  I'm thinking that those here who are in college or some type of post grad schooling may be experiencing that same pressure;  I certainly did when I was working full time and going to school 4 nights a week.

Too much is made of aging forgetfulness and other changes, w/o appropriate medical documentation.    These conclusions and observations need to be documented; otherwise they can be dangerous.    And don't forget that by the time people are our age, they've lived a lot more, experienced more events (sometimes horrid ones), and that life experience can add to already existing severe concerns.

Remember 911?  Anyone feel as if he/she were losing some mental ability then?  I certainly did.

And for those going through periods of high stress, I think that some dementia like confusion isn't unusual.   And #2, we're living now in that kind of period, not only b/c of the pandemic but b/c of intense political situations here over the last years and now in Ukraine. 

Can anyone really consider the potential for Russian nuclear attacks w/o becoming emotionally frightened?   It's easy in that state to become forgetful and/or confused.
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Get a professional neuropsychological test. Do not rely in what people say. There are many pseudo-psychologists around who enjoy putting psychological labels to anyone.
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doxies4ever, for starters it is all subject to opinion. And only a specialist can make that conclusion.

Has your daughter said why she thinks you have dementia? Or is she confusing just normal age related forgetfulness or absentmindedness? The way I look at it, our brain has file drawers and as we age those file drawers get really full. Thus, it take time to pull out the right file with the info we need. And there are times when the info has been misfiled.

I wouldn't be concerned unless you are putting your car keys in the refrigerator.
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Grandma1954 Apr 2022
Had to laugh at this...there were times when I was working that I did put my keys in the refrigerator just to remind myself to take a baked good I had made to work with me for the staff meeting. Even after I retired when baking for my Support Group I did the same thing.
Its when you forget what the keys are for that there is a problem.
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Have you discussed this with your doctor?
Would you want your daughter to go with you to your appointment and discuss with the doctor why she thinks you may have dementia? What things has she noticed that are of a concern? Do you share these same concerns?
Most annual physicals will now include a MME. That is just a simple starting point.
If there are concerns you could also ask for a referral to a Neurologist or a Neuropsychologist for a full exam.
One of the other things you can do is prepare for ANY medical diagnosis is get all your paperwork in order. Who will be POA for any health decisions? Who will be POA for financial decisions? Do you have forms filled out indicating what medical interventions you want taken in the advent of an emergency? Have you discussed your wishes with family?
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One can inherit certain types of dementia but you are not *guaranteed* to inherit it. It's all up to the gene pool lottery.
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Go to your doctor and tell them about your daughter's concerns, ask for an evaluation.
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