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I’m so sorry this situation turned out to be a nightmare. Your husband hasn’t a clue what this is doing to you. For one thing he’s the son and he’s not home all day. You are being told by him to take her abuse. NO! You have every right to want your life the way it was. This was not what you signed up for. Yes she has a brain disease which has affected her personality but I bet before the disease she was no sweet thing. For the sake of your marriage she needs to be placed in a NH. How dare your hubby say YOU need a support group. You both could benefit from an objective therapist to work out the feelings and issues here. No one can MAKE you feel guilty...only you can take on that role. Guilt implies you did something wrong and you haven’t. You are expressing feelings. So unless you want a contentious and unhappy marriage ruled and manipulated by his mother, I advise you to move her out.
and I don’t think your hubby has a clue what 24/7 in home care costs which is much more than memory care where there are trained caregivers. She could live many more years I hope you know
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I went through almost the exact thing! My husband is an only child and evidently she made his life h*ll when he was growing up. She is a widow and wAs running through her money like crazy buying stuff at auctions and yard sales that was worthless junk but she thought it was expensive antiques! She fell and broke her hip and was in the nursing home for rehab to get her back to walking. She was 87 at the time and I was 57. I had a scheduled right hip replacement because I had rheumatoid arthritis and had been a nurse for over 30 years and basically had worn my hip out. The nursing home called and said she was to be discharged because her insurance wouldn't pay for long term care. So at 13 days after I had a complete hip replacement , she came to our house and was unable to get out of bed (according to her) so here I was having to clean her and bath her and carry her food to her and me a patient myself. Family would visit but no one offered to help. She got to telling some awful lies about me to make everyone feel sorry for her. She told my husband, her son, that all I wanted to do was lay in the bed making it look like I wasn't taking care of her, and he was in the middle of it. But he finally stood up for me and asked her just who was cooking three meals a day plus snacks for her and she said Bernice is (me), he asked her who bathed her everyday, and she said Bernice. He asked her when she messed on herself or wet the bed who changed her bed and she said Bernice. He kept on naming all the things I did for her and she said Bernice was doing it. In the process, he got mad at himself thinking how I was getting done plus not getting to take care of myself and he told her he was giving her 24 hours to get out of that bed and start taking care of herself or he was going to sell her house and giving it to a nursing home to care for her till she died. Well she started crying and he said she should be ashamed of how she had done me plus he apologized to me for leaving her for me to take care of by myself. She went home and She is still living by herself except a great grandson is staying with her while he is in college. Sometimes you have to set limits. Mothers in law have 2 types; those who love their dil and those who hate and are jealous of their dil. Never ever let a mil get between you and your spouse. If they cannot abide by the boundaries you and your spouse set, then it's time to send them home with a live in helper paid for by them, or if they cannot afford to pay for help, then a nursing home may be the only choice.
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Your husband is correct about only one thing: It's the disease.

And a person with this disease cannot be reasoned with, cannot be expected to take others' feelings into consideration, cannot be expected to remember what was said 5 minutes ago. A person with this disease can become verbally abusive, physically abusive, and exhaust everyone around them with their care needs.

But you and your husband don't have the disease. You have the responsibility of keeping yourselves healthy and sane while providing your MIL with the level of support she requires. This does not mean you are the ones who have to directly provide that care. And, from what you posted, she requires a level of care that is way beyond the scope of what you, your husband or extended can emotionally and physically provide.

It's time to step back and disengage from the emotional aspect for a moment so you can make some decisions. Regardless of where she is, your MIL requires full-time care from someone other than you. Whatever that looks like, from moving her to your SIL's or her grand-daughter's, or hiring 24/7 in-home care that is separate in all ways from what you and your husband do in your own lives (like meals, sitting together, etc.), or moving her to a memory care facility.

Who has your MIL's powers of attorney? If no one has established this, it's time to do so. And it's time to take charge of your lives, even if your husband isn't with you on this.
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Under no circumstances should you be expected to live with constant abuse.   If your husband will not look for options, you need to go ahead and do it yourself.  A support would be a good idea just for your  sanity, as well as to validate your feelings.  If you can afford it, find a small place to get away to and tell your husband he needs to arrange for a caretaker to come in during that time.  You could work from that location and get some peace of mind.  Once you have done all these things, your husband can decide if he wants things to stay that way, or if he wants to find an option for his mother's care and wants you back in the house full time.  A husband who does not care about his wife's emotional well-being, and puts his mother before her, needs to learn to live without her.
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Your husband is in denial. She is starting to choke on her food which means the deterioration of her brain is starting to affect vital bodily functions. She requires professional care, care that, with the best will in the world, neither you nor your husband are equipped to give her. Even if her temperament was sweet and even.
Does she see a doctor? She/he should be able to make informed recommendations.
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well until your hubby has to deal with everything 24/7 he has not much to say when you tell him you are done being the slave.  personally it sounds like she should have been moved into a NH the 10 months ago and you all can actually be a family and visit instead of regretting things and no longer feel like a family but a "caregiver and/or slave" however you want to label it.  Why should you be the only one going for counseling, it sounds like he needs a wake up call and he go also with you when discussing this matter.  If he wanted someone to come take care of her, then that should have been done before moving her in with you, the caregiver could have lived with your mom and they can be done in shifts.  And IF she has severe dementia, then the shifting between people off and on during the week with other family members is NOT a good idea......it cause them more confustion/anger issues.  Sounds like hubby feels guilty for not seeing her as much as he should have so now trying to make amends.......won't work now.........Sure wishing you luck with this matter.
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You have received a lot of very good advice from the caring people here. My suggestion is not easy but fairly simple. Tell your husband that your mother is moving to a memory care unit by such and such a date or one of you is moving out. Consult an attorney and make certain that you cannot be charged with abandonment if it is you that leaves.
While MIL is elsewhere make the trips to find her placement, maybe two options and let your husband choose between the two options you present. Or better yet invite your husband to join you, if he doesn’t go along then make the decision yourself. Be certain to ask what evaluations and documentation each facility requires for placement.
I’m sorry to say this but your husband is the problem not your MIL. As long as you continue to take care of his mother he will let you, he is not wanting to make things change for your well being or that of your marriage. He has made his choice and you will have to make yours.
I’ll assume you will get her moved out, then you and your husband will need to get some counseling to repair your marriage. He has chosen his mother, it is painful and you deserve so much better. Be strong. Be brave. You can take charge of your life.
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Not trying to be rude here, but you need marriage counseling whether your MIL moves into a home or not. I've said it often here on this site "people treat you the way you allow them to treat you." Prayers for all of you. Hang in there, if you want to. You are not an emotional punching bag.
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I think your graciousness, loving heart, spirit of cooperation and attentive care towards your difficult MIL is beyond commendable. You and your husband didn’t know how it was going to go. The fact that she has Alzheimer’s doesn’t make your marriage any less important. You must put your marriage first. It sure sounds to me that MIL is ready for a nursing home. You tried it and if one spouse is unhappy with the set-up...that’s a deal breaker.
My husband cares for his extremely difficult mother with dementia one 24 hr. period in a month, and we keep her for several hours every Sunday. She has a full time care giver hired by the family and this dear woman gets 1 day/night off per week. The adult siblings take their turn with their 24 shift.
My MIL was rarely kind to me over the last 40 yrs. I’ve known her. She was all about her 2 daughters and I was the “enemy” and rarely included. Now, my SIL’s expect me to help out. My loving husband has told me, “No, this isn’t your responsibility...especially in light of her mean spirited behavior toward you over the years.”
I wouldn’t think twice of placing her in a nursing home. She had her chance to live her life the way she wanted. Just because someone has dementia, doesn’t mean there’s a universal rule that it should ruin the adult children’s lives.
If your husband’s disagrees, and he puts his mother above you...then this issue is a marriage issue that needs to be addressed.
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I find it very strange that your husband stands by and witnesses you being abused and accepts that you cannot do even very simple normal-life things, in your own home. Your mother in law has dementia and that may explain at least some of her behavior. What explains his?
You cannot live like this, where you can’t even enjoy a meal or a movie or even a kiss with your spouse without abuse. She has to go into whichever type of facility is appropriate for her. She cannot be there with you any longer. Once that’s squared away, you can assess whether your marriage is salvageable.
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One thing fir sure, with dementia, it won't ever get better, it only gets worse.
I suggest having another family member have her move in with them and if that can't happen, see if you can move MIL into a Senior Apartment and hire a Live In as that would be about 1/3 the cost of hiring Caregivers in Shifts for 24 7 Care.

All the family could take her one day a weekend to give the Live In a break, therefore you might just have her one day a month.

Check your MIL finances and see if this is something affordable.

If not then start
Checking on Nursing Homes. Find a couple, show them to your husband and then let MIL choose the one she likes best.

In the end, you are the only one to take care of you.

Start going places and let Your husband stay home with his mom all day by himself and after a few weekends, he'll realize what it's like for you and will be more understanding.

Sad when people lose their minds but in this case, seeing someone once or twice a year is understandable that you are a stranger to her and she sees you as you're invading her home.

Prayers
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Tutgrum21 Nov 2020
Ther are no facilities open to new senior citizens in Flagler County , so what do you suggest?
Doesn’t look like families have any alternatives also the cost of NH is prohibitive, parents who don’t plan ahead or give their children Power of Attorney are being unrealistic, ( I’m assuming they have a loving , caring , attitude.
It helps to have a discussion long before the need , so that all consents and provisions are agreed for when and if the occasion arises.
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I say step out of the picture100% in her care. Your husband needs a wake up call. He's in denial. Until he realizes just how bad she is, nothing will change. You've done your part, now let him do his and blast that sister in law to suggest mom lives with you!! Your mil needs to be in a facility wether your hb thinks so or not. You deserve a 3 week vacation leaving husband alone to care for his mom. He can get at the very least time off his job from the family leave act. You've done your share...now let him either do his or HE can find her a facility. She is his mom...not yours. God luck...
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lealonnie1 Nov 2020
Exactly! A 3 week all expenses paid vacation to an all inclusive Club Med type place on the beach!!
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You took on a job you had no experience with, and now, you have no support. Dementia & Alzheimer's is something that even seasoned pros who work in Memory Care Assisted Living homes have difficulty with at times. They work in teams 24/7, yet you are expected to do this alone, for the most part, and care for a woman who is quite agitated (which is common with dementia) and acting out towards you most of the time. Your DH has his head in the sand and is laying a guilt trip on you and that's a bad thing. Perhaps HE should quit HIS job and take care of her FULL TIME? That would last a week, at most, before he threw up his hands in surrender and started looking into Memory Care ALFs, trust me.

Advice to shift your MIL around from house to house isn't good. People with dementia need familiarity and continuity. A Memory Care ALF would be best because they are fully equipped to deal with her behaviors 24/7, while you are not *nor should you be expected to*.

I hope you do show your DH all these responses and that he has a reality check as a result. Caring for a demented elder in home reaches the point where it becomes impossible for the vast majority of us, as you are now seeing. When your MIL starts playing with her feces and smearing it all over the place, we'll see you back here asking for advice about what to do NOW!? That's how this scenario often plays out. Then she needs an anti strip jumpsuit to sleep in along with a Depends and a liner, so she can't get into her pants and make a mess. THIS is where dementia/ALZ often goes..........downhill FAST.

Research nearby Memory Care ALFs. My mother lives in one and let me tell you, she gets a GREAT quality of care over there that I could NEVER give her here as I'm only one human being. Common sense dictates what needs to happen now.

In the meantime, I suggest you read up about dementia/ALZ at Alzheimers.org and watch Teepa Snow videos on YouTube as she is a wonderful teacher on the subject & can provide you with valuable coping strategies as well as hands on techniques to use with MIL.

Wishing you the very best of luck getting through to your DH and getting him to see and to FEEL your pain. Placing his mother in care is not 'abandoning' her; it's helping her AND it's saving his marriage, which is what ought to come FIRST.
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What helped for my HB and me was to hire someone to stay with MIL for an evening and get out on a date night.  Go somewhere you can talk openly about what is happening and needs to happen.  It may be that he is so close to mom that he is not seeing what it going on.  I suggest a picnic in the park, if you like that kind of thing and if weather cooperates,  or a casual dining place like pizza,  but whatever you do make it somewhere you can talk to each other openly.  It helps, sometimes just venting to him will help him see what MIL is doing to your relationship.   (I know I had MIL in our home for 10+ years before we finally made the decision for a NH,  and even under the best of circumstances it effects your relationship with HB.)
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Tell him that she is starting to choke on her food because maybe she has some shakes? parkinsons? Either way having a professional available at all times to help with the choking is necessary and the best way to do that is in a nursing home. The amount of stress taking care of her has put the whole family in turmoil.
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lealonnie1 Nov 2020
Choking & eating issues in general come along with later stages of dementia; it's quite common.
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I think you should let her stay until your husband feels something else s.sneeds to be done. Hire someone to come in and help you part time. If you put her someplace that gets quarantined due to Covid, she will be all alone and chances are won't be allowed any visitors. I seen this where I work and even in their last hour they were alone. Do you want to take a chance that you cause that to happen for your husband and his mother?
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runaway Nov 2020
I am sorry, but you are worried about the husband and his mother...what about her sanity and that fact that MIL is not her mother and not her responsibility...the husband needs to figure out how to take care of his own mother without killing off his wife! So sorry, I am not caring for anyone else's mother unless he is an only child and they have a great relationship...but the abuse is definitely a no, no in my book! Husband needs to find a way to care for his mother himself...not his wife's job...not in my book!

Okay, so we are all worried about COVID-19, well what if the wife dies, what then...won't the husband have to find a way to care for his mother?????? Just saying...I took care of both my parents and I am not taking care of anyone else's mother...caring for my parents almost killed me!
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The hard truth is that this is just the beginning of a decline for your MIL. You can't stop it, but you can save your relationship with your husband. Taking her into your home was kind but unrealistic. What do you do when the granddaughter can't help? When her incontinence increases? When her mind plays worse tricks than you can imagine on her and you?
After 15 years of caretaking, I placed my mom in a NH to keep her safe and to save my health. After a lifetime of exceptional health, I was just diagnosed with a serious heart problem. They "don't know" when or why this developed, but I'm sure the years of stress took their toll, overloading my body with cortisol. The rest of my life is diminished. This could be your fate if you ignore your own needs.
Your husband desperately wants to help his mother, a good son and a good person. It's hard to admit a parent's state is beyond your means to help. His experience and yours are different here, but neither of you can know how long this stay could be or how hard it can get. You have to both fight the denial. Sorry, but it WILL GET WORSE! Save your marriage -- and your lives -- by moving MIL into a care facility while you still have the energy.
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My mom moved in with us. She needs 24/7 care which we receive through Medicaid. I have caregivers coming and going 24/7 which is an invasion of privacy but it works ok for us... we just hope it doesn’t go on for years. The caregivers stay with my mom in her room or take her outside. Check with a lawyer if you can get her on Medicaid CDPASS.
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FloridaDD Nov 2020
In many (most?) states, it is virtually impossible to get 24/7 care paid by Medicaid.   It is a state by state thing, but even NY is getting tougher.   They will push for the elderly one to get moved to nursing home
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You have been left with more responsibility for your MIL than you want., and your husband is obviously torn between attachment to his mother and standing up for you. If he is nurturing and empathetic and feels a need to "protect" his Mother as she becomes more disabled and dependent, I feel badly for him, but he needs to be realistic about the her attitude has on you. It may be unreasonable to expect youto do all the accommodating.

You have some good plans for hands-on help, but It must be very defeating to endure MIL's criticism. Your exasperation at her complaints certainly justifies your outburst of "better than nursing home food." I think if it were me I would be tempted to take a "vacation" for a couple of weeks and stay in a hotel, but that might be harder to do during COVID.
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Having gone through this with my own father I know what you are going through. Your spouse is selfish as he is not at home to take care of her. Who is actually taking care of her? When I moved my father in he was able to help himself and my spouse hated it! His mother wanted to move in as well..she has two daughters who I might add she cared for ALL their children...I have no children. I told him help no, I would rather divorce him and live with my father. Well then it really was an issue so I moved my dad back into his own home and I moved in with him and now he needed 24/7 care. My sister did not help, my spouse was just a selfish person.

If MIL has a daughter that is who she should be staying with and if that is not possible it is time to put her in NH as doesn't get any better, only worse. My dad passed last year August 22 and I miss him terribly but if what I know now I knew then I would not have moved him into my home...it caused a great big mess in my relationship which to this day has not healed and I doubt it will.

My sister in law and I said we would NEVER care for our MIL cause she has two able bodied daughter, and grandchildren...she is not our mother and main thing is we did not have a relationship with her. She was plotting to move into one of her home...she stated so, but thank God we both are strong and independent and said hell no! When she was plotting to move in she started calling us and sending birthday cards and giving us Christmas gifts. Really lady? We did not fall for it!

Tell your spouse you love him, but his mother is not your responsibility...I am sorry you are going through this, it is not easy when it is your own, and it is even more devastating when it's not your own parent. Tell your spouse it is time for NH...yes it is hard, but for your sanity...you need to do it! I was losing my mind, no sleep, not eating and cried all the time especially when I thought about if I died before dad who would care for him?

I wish and hope for you all the very best and that a favorable solution is reached and reached fast! Hugs!
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rovana Nov 2020
I have to disagree that it is a daughter's (read woman's) responsibility to do caregiving. Women have a right to their autonomy just as much as men do.
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If this is harming the relationship between your husband and you. If it is emotionally harming you, then those are reasons enough for MIL to stop living with you and be living in a place with trained help. Your home needs to be a safe environment for you and family. It’s impossible to ignore her behaviour and live with it. Her words and actions will keep triggering you and this is toxic. Caregivers can become stressed and sick.
Take care of yourself and of your relationship. Say no.
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I've been the husband. I couldn't handle seeing my LO loose their personality, their independence...who they were at their core. My husband did most of the heavy caretaking for a year before we finally, after a few incidences of dementia induced violence, made the decision to put my LO in a nursing home. It was a rough year - it was very difficult to go on vacation, leave the house even for a hike... To this day I admire my husband for all he did and I thank him every time my LO comes up in a conversation. I highly recommend that husband starts showing some appreciation. What your doing is a nearly impossible job that you're not qualified for and for your husband to tell you that "need help" without thanking you and showing major appreciation, is bad bad bad on his part. To your husband: I think it's important to think about whether your making things worse or better by keeping MIL at home. And you need to consider everything that's important in the decision, including your marriage. Yes, dementia is a disease, but like what someone said before, keeping her at home isn't going to cure her. She's not going to get better. If guilt is what is keeping your mother out of a NH...why isn't guilt for putting your marriage and your spouse through such stress and insults a consideration for putting MIL in a NH? What if something happens under your wife's watch? Do you and your family plan to blame your wife? Did you think about the massive responsibility your putting on your wife?
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It sounds like your husband needs to be educated on his mother’s illness and the support group .
I would suggest a camera with audio.
your options are hiring outside help and she remain with you or reconsider assistive living in a memory care unit .
it doesn’t sound like a healthy situation and your husband has blinders on .
I have lived in a mother /daughter.
Recently , My mother past and we are planning to sell and move my dad into an assistive living bc the stress is affecting our mental health , physical health , blood pressure , not to mention our relationship . My husband fall asleep at 8:30 the other night after a stressful day .
i wish you the best .
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Some people are not meant to be caregivers especially for someone you don't know very well. I understand that your husband doesn't want to put his mother in a care facility, but does he want to stay married? Sometimes you can't do both. You will continue to build up resentment no matter how much "help" your husband gets you. Your house is not your house anymore. I'm sorry if it sounds harsh but, this will not get better, only worse. Sit down with your husband and make arrangements for assisted living, memory care or whatever for your mother. You may need to resort to medicaid, but if that is what is available, then that is what is available. Both you and your husband may have to develop a thicker skin so as to not feel guilty, but you (and he), need to put your marriage first.
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I’d go to your library or call social services and see where you can get some material to read about people with Alzheimer’s or dementia. She can’t help it she repeats stuff all day long or doesn’t remember stuff. And if you scream at her it makes it all that more worse!!
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Isthisrealyreal Nov 2020
It is not the Original Poster that is doing the screaming, it is the MIL and she does know because she doesn't do it unless her son is there. Selective cognition?
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Imho, this dynamic is not working especially since your MIL has Alzheimer's. Suggest facility living for your MIL. Prayers sent.
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This arrangement is clearly not fair to you and your husband does not sound at all sympathetic to your feelings even though you are helping with his mother. In addition, your MIL is interfering with your marriage. I would let him go ahead and the hire 24/7 help and then step away from your current responsibilities for her care. In other words, let him fully take responsibility of everything involving her care and maybe he'll appreciate you a lot more. Since she is in your home, it's also very important to start setting boundaries with her. Even a young child will respond to boundaries and it's not too late to start with her. You deserve the proper respect in your own home. It's inexcusable for your husband to ignore her behaviours directed towards you. Even if some behaviors are due to her altered mental status, that does not make it less distressing to you or anyone else who has to take care of her. If worst comes to worst, maybe her physician can be consulted about what can be done to improve her agitated mood. Best wishes to you.
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I'm sorry for your experience. I would loop in her doctor and request a meeting with a memory care service provider. Let them explain how her needs are best met in (memory) care unit. Her safety is paramount and her acting out is not manageable at home. You could supplement by visiting, bringing her treats and being available to her. Best wishes ~ Nydia
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Dear OP, I was concerned about what was happening for you, and re-read the first few posts, including “I love my husband and he is truly a wonderful man. His caring and compassionate personality is what made me fall in love with him.” I recently replied to another poster who said her fiance is ‘a keeper’ for much the same reasons (and about similar problems).

My reply was “There are many posts about guys who are ‘keepers’, and it often seems to depend on them being helpful, non-assertive, and pleasant to be with. Unfortunately, many of them seem to be incapable of standing up to mother. Give him a clear choice - you or mother. If he won’t choose, get out. The compromise solutions are just another way to show that you don’t come first.” 

I do hope that things are sorting themselves out. Yours truly, Margaret
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My mom had akz for 15 years. I fully understand the behavior. With all the compassion I can muster, stop the freakin madness. And that's what it is, madness. You may not be able to see this from the inside, but I certainly can. Your MIL needs a nursing home. You will spend your health trying to do something you can't.

In a short time she may need diapers, refuse to bathe, get violent, walk out of the house while your sleeping, drink Murphys oil soap when no one's looking because it looks like apple juice (my precious mom drank blue nail polish remover because she was thirsty). I'm so very sorry but you're out of your depth.

The choking concerns me. At a nursing home, they have special meals for those who tend to choke. They will even have someone feed her if that's needed. They have a large supply of diapers and pull ups. There is someone around and awake 24 hours a day in case something happens. She can make friends who are in the same boat. Havibg that was a great comfort to my mom.

I would start touring nursing homes. A good one can be a life saver. You will know when you walk in whether it's goid or not. Pay attention to the way the people are treated.

Good luck and be strong. If your MIL moves to a nursing home, you can visit often. You'll just have someone else doing the heavy lifting.
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