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Major kudos to you, girl! This is the first time I have gone to someones question and was very disappointed in most of the responses. Seemed to me that they just didn't "get" it. To go against yourself this way just shows how much love, compassion, and concern you have for your mom which is absolutely awesome. I personally believe the decision to get the shot would be in your moms best interest. Think about this...What would it do to you if you didn't get the shot and "Horror upon Horror" you get the flu, give it to her, and cause of death would read complications due to flu? Would you be able to deal with that? My thoughts and prayers are with your mom, you and your partner! (I have no thoughts on getting the vaccine myself as I am deathly allergic to the preservative that is used in all types of the vaccine.)
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I understand that there is a preservative free flu shot.
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Thanks, Coolies --- I wish I could just go through it for her. I don't want to ever be a threat to her health. I got the shot.

The bigger problem? My partner is highly -- I mean, borderline conspiracy theory tin foil hat wearing freaked out about the vaccine. She refuses to take it. Although we have a large house -- I do not want to risk my mom getting sick. Maybe I should start another thread!!! How do I get her to take it, even if against her own views and beliefs on it? I mean, of course I can say, "Well, if you don't take the vaccine then move out" but she and I have always been on the SAME wavelength -- that this vaccine is very harmful. Recently, a young man died from a result of the vaccine, and more and more people are having neurological disorders because of it. I have references if people are going to 'argue' with that. I don't mean to scare you. I took the shot and took the risk for my mom. I just need my partner to agree with me as well.

She feels that it was all for nothing and is worried about MY health.

*sigh*
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Flu has risks of neurologic injury as well...but anyways, if partner does not get the shot, if she gets exposed or starts to sniffle, she needs to be quarantined away from Mom.
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Any chance she would do FluMist if they have one this year?
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Vstefans --- nope. She is soooooooo anti-anything-vaccine. I started to think ahead and I have bought these Lysol wipes. I wipe down EVERY single doorknob and high traffic area myself.

Now, the health proxy (my sister) refuses to take the vaccine as well, and she carts my mom around to the doctors too and spend a lot of time at the home. She said, "Well, if I get sick then I'll stay home." But isn't the incubation period a couple of weeks in our systems?

For me, I would never get the vaccine. But, to keep my mom safe --- of course. I value her life more than any "belief" I have. The only complaint I have as of now with the vaccine is that my arm ached for a whopping 2 days. BIG DEAL. But, I know that there are some ingredients that I am very fearful over. But my biggest fear is mom getting sick from me.
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Boogs, if you and your partner do have a child just think of all the discussions you'll have over those vaccinations, especially with measles and whooping cough on the rise again. You are likely to have many more opportunities to discuss this issue while worrying about not causing that child to come down with an illness.
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TheBoogs, great idea of wiping down every single doorknob and high traffic areas..... and you would need to wipe down your partner with Lysol wipes, too, since she isn't going to get her shot. Any time she leaves home, she could bring back the flu bug without realizing it.

Have your partner wear a hospital mask when she sees your mother, hopefully that mask won't scare Mom. And don't have your partner hand anything to your Mom that she has handled any time during the day, or sneezed or cough near during the day as your partner can carry the flu bug for several weeks before it will make her sick, and during those weeks your partner can pass that virus to others who didn't have the flu shot.

TheBoogs, hope your Mom is doing well with her treatment.
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Nobody's willing, but my parter is willing enough to take the precautions to help my mom stay safe. I need a friggin decontamination room for all those who haven't taken the flu vaccine. Unreal. Suck it up - right? I used to be militant about it when it was just about "ME", but now it's not about me anymore. I don't understand why some people are so selfish, you know? Maybe I'm just being mean. I don't know. Very frustrated over the lack of concern.

And thank you so much for your advice and concern. I appreciate it.
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That's the thing, rarely is anything just about the individual. There is a community interest in preventing the spread of disease, war, preventing crime and poverty. Not sure who you think was selfish and uncaring, and unconcerned. I thought maybe it was you before it you became implanted with some others opinions about what was good for mom and the community.
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I agree, Vegaslady, this about what is best for the community.

I just hope when any of us need to go to the ER that we aren't waiting in line for hours on end because the ER exam rooms are filled with people who didn't want or who were afraid to get their flu shot [scared of needles] and are now very sick. Thus taking a bed from a person who was taking care of him/herself but had a medical emergency.
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Truth is, each time I had the flu shot, I got the flu. The past 10 years of not taking the shot --- I never got the flu once. But I am not willing to take the chance with my mom, like I said before. I am not a threat to the "community" because I work from home and I am very conscious of germs. We're all gonna die from something. A man recently died of the flu vaccine itself. So which is worse?

But to be around a cancer patient, yes I will risk my health with this poison and suck it up.

And freqflyer --- you don't think the ER has a bunch of idiots walking in there with a "headache" or some hypochondriacal illness and "fake heart attacks" because they had an anxiety attack? You're worried about people actually being sick "wasting" a bed, when someone in the next room had a bad case of gas? Think about it. Don't worry about hospital beds, because the cardiology floor has HALF or more patients who had GERD, staying there for 3 or more days getting stress tests, echocardiograms and anticoagulants because they're laying around in their bed for days. All because they needed a little Tums. Most of my family work in hospitals, so believe me, many beds "wasted" --- truly wasted. Being truly sick is not wasted.
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I have done enough reading to know that the best insurance against illness is diet and rest.
Vaccines are an artificial immunization against a particular illness. When the vaccine is run it's course, you are no longer immune against the disease. If you actually produce your own immunity, it will last a lifetime. Artificial immunity can also trigger other immune responses in the body. The vaccines that are produced today are also vastly different than vaccines when we were all young. There are heavy metals and genetic material in them that can cause harmful effects.
As an individual, I am dead set against vaccines. The last time I had the flu was close to 20yrs ago.
Boogs, if you want to care for your Mom to have the best chance of fighting illness, give her the best possible food she will eat, rest and as much happy stimulation you can. I would recommend the same for you too.
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TheBoogs, a person dying from the flu vaccine is extremely rare... a person dying from the flu itself is not rare. Complications of flu can include bacterial pneumonia, severe dehydration, and worsening of chronic medical conditions, such as congestive heart failure, asthma, or diabetes.

Last flu season 105 children died from the flu. During the 2009 flu pandemic there were 348 pediatric deaths here in the States. Sadly, 90% of those deaths could have been prevented with a flu shot :(

Staying in the hospital for tests for 3 or more days? I question that. I had major surgery a few years back and I was out of the hospital in less than 24 hours. My sig had a battery of heart tests, etc, and he was in the hospital over night but the whole stay starting with the ER was less than 12 hours. No health insurance company will let anyone linger around waiting for testing to be done. If you are elderly, the hospital might keep you there for 3 days so you will be eligible to go into rehab.
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I wonder how many people who won't take the flu shot and say that they never had the flu in over 20 years will ever come back onto this website and say, oops this season I caught the flu.

We all have our choices, I've done research on flu shots and I prefer to go the way of preventive medicine. I wouldn't want my aging parents to get the flu because I didn't want to get my own flu shot and have it develop into severe pneumonia, and die... how would I be able to live with that? Thank goodness my parents think the same way I do, and now they are in their mid-90's, they still ask for me to take them for their flu shots [which they have been getting for over 30 years]... not once have they ever had a reaction to the shot.
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To The Boogs: so many inaccuracies in your blog. Perhaps more research is called for at unbiased sources. Sounds like you have been talking/reading people with a strong one-sided bias.
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Miette, thank you. Even the oncologist said that the diet that I am on - which I have been cooking and preparing for my mom is perfect. I'm on the Paleo lifestyle which is basically non-GMO, no wheat, no pasta, no sugar -- just all organic greens, veggies and grass fed meat. Most vitamins include D, C & B12 for her anemia (when she had it). Her blood count is very good and she's actually doing well now.

Fact is, billions of dollars from vaccines: In 2012, it was $25B. I'm sure it's much more now. Despite the costs, the flu generally kills those who have weak immunities, babies and alertly or sick or those who do not get treatment and stay home trying to stick it out. There are so many people who do not want to go to the doctor.

In November 2013, a healthy 19-year old young man died from a routine exam that included the flu vaccine. Chandler Webb received the flu shot on October 15th, and then died on November 19th, 28 days later. Since the flu shot is considered safe in the medical field, doctors waited too long to suspect that the flu shot was causing Chandler’s rapidly deteriorating medical condition, according to his mother. She believes that if they had investigated the adverse reaction to the flu shot immediately, he might still be alive today. You can watch the interview here:
healthimpactnews/2014/flu-vaccine-is-the-most-dangerous-vaccine-in-the-united-states-based-on-settled-cases-for-injuries/

My point is: I did vaccinate myself against all beliefs, because there is a margin of error with any belief. I can say to the vast majority, "Yes, yes, I got the flu shot," in case mom does get the flu. But, they're not stating that they have no idea which strains are out there and using the most populated strains. That's uncertainty for me.

Nadiaa, which inaccuracies are you stating regarding "my blog"? I can back up all facts regarding my research and beliefs.

Regardless, I know that both sides: the anti-flu vaccination people and the pro-flu vaccination people ALL have flaws in their "certainty" that 'this will work' or 'that will work' 100%.

But now, it's not about me and my beliefs, it's about being a sheep for my mother. Roaming with the rest of the herd so that mom will be "safe" -- whatever that means.

The vaccine debate really can't be a debate since both sides are lacking information, while one side makes billions and billions of dollars. I'm open to hearing the other side, in fact, I went to 'the other side' and got the vaccine. My concerns are for my mom and how the herd wants me to vaccinate vaccinate vaccinate, to strains that do not exist right now. Pointless. Really pointless… but I did it.

Baaaa.
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The fact that you called those of who believe in preventative medicine *sheep* tells me all I need to know. I rest my case.
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Baa-aaa :)

Can I be a sheep with occasional goaty moments, please?

Mind you, levity aside, it's a useful analogy all round. Because it's the quality of the shepherds that wants keeping an eye on - and that, in a democracy operating on the basis of informed consent, is everybody's concern. Pick good shepherds, or acquire postgraduate degrees in epidemiology, immunology and statistics and then "faîtes vos jeux…"
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It's NOT preventive medicine. Give me proof.

I rest my case. Baaaa.
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If your mother does not get the flu shot, you probably should get one to protect yourself. I see above there are some oncologists who do not want patients to have the flu shot because of a weakened immune system.
I used to feel like you, but ended up with the flu. According to the pharmacist the newer flu vaccines have fewer side effects. No by mid October I am getting my flu shot.
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Everyone needs to reseach every health concern for themselves before making them selves available for offered medical services. It's your choice, so do what feels right and accept the consequences. Think Ebola would you accept a vacine for that before traveling to Africa if one was available???????????????? Weigh the risks and benefits. I will be baring my arm in the next few days.
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TheBoogs, check out in history all the flu pandemics that had killed millions of people worldwide. This was before the flu vaccines were invented. And before it was a normal thing for half the population worldwide to get their flu shots.
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I have had a flu shot every year for as long as I can remember. Hoping I don't jinx myself - I have never had the flu, ever. My mom is 99, she gets her shot also and she lives in a senior housing where people do get the flu as older people are more susceptible (but most opt to get the shot, offered for free there). She has never had the flu either. The only reaction I have had is a little tiredness and achy a few days later. My sister refused the shot for years, saying once it gave her the flu, which we know is not possible with a dead virus. She gets sick a lot anyway, and it was a coincidence she just got another one of the viruses she always gets. Ten years ago she got very very very sick with the flu. She was sick for weeks. Now she gets the shot and has never had the flu since. Everyone has to choose for themselves, but for me, I hate to be sick. I'm too busy and have enough little health issues that I don't need to add being bedridden for a week to them. There are special vaccines for those sensitive to eggs etc. But, everyone must choose for themselves. I would get your mom a shot if the doctor recommends it. You really don't want to end up nursing her through the flu and cancer treatments and then catch it and get very sick yourself.
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Freq, the majority being the very young, elderly and those with compromised immune systems. If it wasn't such an issue, why is this a huge debate to begin with? I did what the rest of them wanted me to do in order to (protect) or attempt to protect my mom. So, I did it. But I still believe that these vaccines are very dangerous. *shrugs*

And now, as I sit here and type without having a blip of the flu for years -- since I got the vaccine, I have the flu now.

The vaccine is just poison in my opinion, and through my experience, and through much research.
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Hope you feel better in 24 hours and know that you have done the right thing for yourself and your mother and others you may come in contact with. Drink plenty of water. Take care.
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My mother gets the one without mercury every year and she has not had the flu for years. On the other hand, when I last got the flu vaccine, I had the worst case of flu I had ever had. Same thing with my father. A nurse told me that she never gets it ( but some hospitals are making all health care employees get it) My mother got it again the other day, but I do not plan on getting a vaccine because of auto immune problems. If your mother gets the vaccine, you won't have to worry
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TheBoogs, it is physically impossible to get the influenza A or B viruses from a dead virus flu shot.

Five years ago when I had cancer, two weeks prior to surgery it was recommended that I get my flu shot immediately.... which I did.

The hospital where I do volunteer work, everyone who is employed or sub-contracted with the hospital [hospitality, guards, cleaning crew] or does volunteer work has to show paperwork that you received your yearly flu shot. Visitors must wear masks if they show any signs of a cold [the flu can mimic a cold].
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People with real influenza are usually unable to carry out their daily activities, like blogging.
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Thanks Vegaslady saved me writng that and getting rocks thrown at me.
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