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I am now on furlough status from my warehouse donation sorter job and need to hang on it at only age 64. Unemployment is now my way to get by, and hope employer furlough lasts as long as possible as I need to pay more into Social Security until age 66 and 2 months into November 2021. Think this may happen? It depends on the mercy of COVID19 timing! Not sure how all plans out since CA may extend our shelter in place beyond May 3rd of our 2020. The way I see it, any income just buys me more time until my target of complete pocker cards!
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My advice is that if this job provides you with good, happy moments, even if it tires you, and provides some other benefits, please keep it. Be tough - look out for yourself. Also me it very plain to him it is your life and you are doing what you can to keep your sanity and plan to keep doing it. Tell him to buzz off and leave you alone - don't give in to him. If you do, you will be at his beck and call and under his control - do not let him get away with that. Live your life while you still can if it pleases you.
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Why would you even consider going to a daycare after taking care of your Covid-positive husband? NO! Our State has reopened daycares. It would be too soon for you to go back.
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If you're laid off you can get unemployment with extra federal assistance now because of the pandemic. But not if you quit. You can always quit later.
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Balancing your own needs and that of loved ones is tricky. Your dilemma is just one version of this. I firmly believe you need outside contacts to maintain your sanity as a caregiver but it sounds like your former hours were too much. Could you cut down your hours when they reopen? If not, find someplace to volunteer for 10 hours a week or so. Someplace where you will have a contact with a consistent group of people
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Should you quit your job? No, not if it is essential. My mother worked until age 80 because she was able to and it kept her going.
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Do not quit your job! It is obviously very important to you. I too am 66 and work part-time. It is not about the money, at least for me. I like being productive, I like the chit-chat, and I like the challenge. Social interaction is important to all of us, but especially for seniors. It sounds like you need this job for all the above reasons, and more. Remind your husband that caretakers often die before their spouse/loved one from the stress and difficulty of the tasks. Ask him what he would do without you if that happened!
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Ahmijoy,
If the daycare is going to be closed for a few more months, you have time to go over your finances and carefully consider your decision.
Are you able to go for a walk around the block when hubby is stressing you out? Lock yourself in the bathroom with a book for 20 minutes? Lol. Take care of yourself too!
No need to rush into anything permanent just yet.
Hang in there!
God bless!!
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In the years 2012 to 2013, I got stressed out from caring for my 92-93 year-old mentally ill mother's demands in her failing health. I was forced into breaks by going outside, shopping alone and locking myself into my room for rest, besides looking for a job while unemployed. We could not afford continued caregiver help in our place. After her several falls, she was moved into 2 nursing homes that forced her into Medicaid. Just to save my sanity, since I had to look for new work anyway. Thank goodness I had family to help me. Don't wait for an emergency situation for assistance. My mother was very demanding, fisty and refused available help. I did what I could but had to stop helping Mom and finally turned her over to facilities.
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No, don't quit.
If it's a few months away before you can go back, what's the point of quitting?
If you go back and find that it is all too much, then give notice.
But to be under the microscope all day, with no way out, that sounds very scary and isolating. Keep the job, you may get tired, but it sounds to me like the job has meaning in your life, besides just money.

Take good care of yourself, and when your husband starts telling you what to do, address him calmly, say things like;
When ..........happens
I feel ................
I would like ..............
Or I will need to ................
And if that means you need to take yourself away from him, then do it. Don't be bullied by him, do your best to curtail that now, because controlling behaviour is hard enough to deal with, let alone with all the physical tasks you have to do.

Take good care of yourself.
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What do you want to do? Could you work maybe 4 days a week instead of 5?
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