My mother has not been diagnosed with dementia but has severe short term memory loss. She gave out her debit card number (and denied it) to several unscrupulous individuals. So I (on the account with her) had to have it replaced and hid it. I got her a reloadable card thinking that with a wide variety of restrictions that I can place that it would be safe. Yet somehow they’ve gotten ahold of the number and the same couple of companies managed to try every category (all declined) until they found the one I was allowing for her. She hadn’t had it three weeks and already I have to replace it. Should I just take it too and have her let me know when she needs it physically?
Hide her other cards too like S.S., DL/ID and medical cards. I've caught my wife several times with all those cards out on a table talking to a telemarketer. Finally after several years of telling her not to talk to strangers on the phone, she complies with it for the most part.
I hope your mother with dementia isn't still living alone because that will be the bigger problem here.
Don't let her have credit/debit cards or a checkbook anymore. Small amounts of cash only and only let her have that if she's being supervised spending it.
When my Dad was experiencing some memory loss, I made sure his credit card had a very low usable limit. Example, limit of $200. He rarely used his card, only when he and his caregiver would go to Burger King for fun every few weeks.
Otherwise, my Dad was happy carrying $25 in cash. Anything my Dad needed, I would buy for him and I was reimbursed out of his joint-checking account which had my name. I made sure I kept receipts with copies of the check in a 3-ring binder.
I finally looked into and added blocks at certain times on her card. Added daily limits and such. My problem is the bank info is somehow one of the things she can recite backwards and forwards aside from her dementia. My fear is her calling the bank, getting a new card sent and me having to start all over again. My mom cannot manage her income, bills or anything health related. She’s completely lost that. I am not on her accts at all but I have card info both banking and EBT food related. I have a monthly budget I fill out, send to all 3 siblings for full transparency and print it out for her just so she sees what I’m doing. I pay all her bills on the 4th of the month then give her a balance. I really rambled but I guess it’s that once you take over the banking you’re able to see the good & the bad.
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shes a target now for unscrupulous low lifes
tell her you will order anything she needs -just put it in a list and maybe give her a little book and pen
there are some real gutter low life’s out there - hope u filed a police report
If it is your mum's actions that have caused her to lose money, then you need to take her to a doctor and get a diagnosis.
Before that, however, persuade your mum to make you POA. She cannot assign anyone if she doesn't have capacity. Then, get the diagnosis. You want to protect yourself from being accused of abuse, as well as protecting your mum from fraudulent people.
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