I was told to obtain a guardianship order for my wife. I don't have time with all of her care. Is there a way around this?

Hi Debralee, you're correct, but surely you do not have to take away a person's heart and soul to be able to give them their disability rights, remove their parents as if they're nothing, having to obtain permission.

Their son will grow up hating to think that he has been declared a nonperson, he may need help but he certainly do not need categorizing as a nonperson. I know this because of the groups I belong to, children who are adults now fighting to be removed from being categorized a nonperson, it is ironic to see an adult man trying to prove he has got the ability to think for himself and runs a business but yet still having to fight to have himself remove off the list.

Well Countrymouse, 1st of all I would like to say, I am not such an idiot to fall for what you call conspiracy theorists, but when it is backed up with facts, any rational human being should step back and listen and research, I am sure when Edward Snowden was telling his friends about what was happening a lot of them would have classed him as a nutter, or belong to some conspiracy theorists group, but it took the poor gentleman to give up his future and his life to prove them wrong, it is extremely sad to think that the majority of people stand by their government explanation, and everyone else, are considered to be conspiracy theorists.

I wonder what you would have been thinking if you live in the time of Jesus, your powerful and gracious king tells you in his eyes there is a huge group of paupers following a man who calls himself Jesus, and believe he is the Messiah. All I can say it someone speaks out about something that could get himself killed or badly injured or endangering him and his family’s future in any way, don’t you think in return he should get at least, the benefit of the doubt.

Personal injury and the structure of its protocol, that should be expected from a lawyer, advice given by Lord Woolf, the civil procedure rules/CPR it is the least that the badly injured claimant/plaintiff should expect out of their lawyer, if that is, they are, highly professional for the case, solicitors that do not have the ability to take on highly complex injury should not have the right to do the job.

The responsibility would fall on the firm to refuse to take on the mission. The reality is, a plumber is breaking the law if he plums in a boiler without the right qualifications, why should a lawyer be any different if he/she does not have the knowledge of brain injury. May I add here, the NHS prof new that my wife received a brain injury but why isn’t it on the report? Could it be because the consultant involved also work for insurance companies as an expert witness receiving £500 for half an hour's work?

I have talked about the CPR rules, a lawyer also have the duty to his client it is called his fiduciary duties to the client. It involves, if you told your plumber to plumb in a washing machine next to the sink, let's say upside down. It is his duty to do as he is told, like the lawyer he can ask you to sign an acknowledgement that he disagree with your decision or ask the court, that he would wish to be removed off the record's. Well one would have thought that is a fair and agreeable scenario.

Well you say your brother-in-law a barrister could turn the air blue with his stories, I would also like to state, there is also a rulebook they have to follow, to prevent injustice and a nightmare for the plaintiff, as the police would classify her, a vulnerable victim. How would you like if England scored a goal on the final minutes, and the referee disallowed it because he favored the other side, well. That is why they have a rulebook to follow.

Well as for Costco's insurers deciding she does not have the mental capacity to do so, 1st of all they would not mention that her capacity is involved because it would cause the insurers more money, that they have cause a disaster to someone's brains, their expert claims that my wife is putting it all on, as for the laws surrounding mental capacity, you would need to read the mental capacity act 2005 may I say came out 2 years after my wives accident, you would need to experts in the field to pronounce that she does not have the mental capacity, after all you are taking away a person's human rights and declaring them as a nonperson.

I came across this thread and found it suiting this area of our law.
The Lord said, if you hate someone you're guilty of murder. Man looks on the outward appearance, but He looks on the heart. Think of it....getting someone fired from their employer by way of harassment, suing a wife or a husband for divorce, getting a child's parent's custody or parental rights taken away, getting a church member put out of the local church, any sort of getting someone's rights or privileges wrongfully cancelled, suspended, revoked, etc., anything whereby someone would willfully snuff out another's "life," so to speak, it's murder in the true, broader definition.

Even here in the US, if you have a case pending, your attorney will advise you NOT to press your case in social media, talk to the press or characterize the defendant in any way. Initially they will ask you to Cease and Desist and the court will uphold the request. Should you continue to post videos, they will ask that you be held in contempt of court (=jail) and attempt to recover damages for defamation that can destroy your hope of settlement. Tread carefully, once you sue in court, you are bound to the agreement to settle only in court and not seek trial-by-youtube.

Here in the US my son and daughter-in-law will need to go to court to establish guardianship of their developmentally disabled son for when he reaches the age of majority (18). They can do this when he turns 16. Sounds odd considering he will be unable to care for himself as an adult and he is their child, but that is the law. I am sure it has to do with being able to receive Social Security Disabilty when he reaches 18 and making sure those payments are utilized for the disabled individual.

You most definitely need to get some outside help be it family, friend or and aide from a senior helper business. No one can do it alone no matter how much you might think you can or believe that is what is expected of you. I felt the same way with my mom who has Alzheimer's, I was never going to place her anywhere, I would care for her. It's a noble thought and gesture but it's impossible. For your health both mental and physical please check with your cities Department of Aging, or other type of family services.

Country mouse you certainly know your onions - I am impressed

Hello again.

I've been watching your videos to try to find out what happened exactly; but wonder if you would mind clarifying? Here's how far I've got:

Your wife suffered head and back injuries as a result of being hit by improperly stored stock at a branch of Costco. I know Costco stores well, I can visualise this - the way packaged appliances are stored on their multiple-storey metal shelving. It must have been a terrifying shock for her, and a terrible thing to happen.

She was taken to hospital - what, straight to Barts, or was she treated anywhere else first? (Not Chase Farm, I hope…)
What were the diagnoses?
What treatment did she have to undergo?
How long was she in hospital?
What was the final prognosis on discharge?

Did Costco admit liability? Straight away or after a bit of a tussle?

What action was taken by the Health & Safety Executive?

Costco's insurers made you an offer of £100,000 as compensation for both your wife's injuries and your consequential losses. But these were separate claims, seeking damages for different things happening to two different people. What offers were made to whom? Who was handling your claims?

Did you accept a settlement? Was this the original offer, or did you get any further with negotiations?

At what point did this matter get to court? Was it your action that put it there, or the insurers'?

So was a settlement eventually reached and awarded to your wife? Was it an improvement on the original offer?

Moving on to the question of your wife's capacity: is it the case that you felt she should reject the offer, and at that point Costco's insurers submitted in court that she lacked the capacity to do so?

If so, hence the intervention of the CPP: if it was found that your wife lacked the capacity to accept or reject an award of damages, it would equally be the case that she would lack the capacity to give you Power of Attorney. That being so, the CPP would take over the management of both her suit against Costco and of her financial affairs entirely. This is when you ought to have applied for guardianship; why didn't you? Or did you?

It seems to me that a comparatively straightforward claim-offer-negotiation- settlement process, with a fully insured and reputable company that appears to have accepted liability - has become a Kafkaesque nightmare. I don't suppose for a moment that one particular party or another is wholly to blame for that; but when you're dealing with an incredibly complex structure like civil law you need to be careful whose advice you're listening to. And I have to say, speaking only for myself, that the last people I'd take advice from is a group of conspiracy theorists working to their own agenda. I'm sorry if this sounds hurtful, I'm sure you've made lots of really good friends with genuinely upsetting stories; but what favours has their intervention done you or your wife?

Colin, you have not been well served by FACT. Paranoia is not your friend. That's not to say that I imagine everything in the garden is rosy. There are, I agree, deep-rooted problems with all of the issues you're facing: compensation for injury, the behaviour of insurance loss adjusters, the seemingly bizarre priorities of a system which holds that transparency is damaging to the management of a case, the machinery of the Court of Public Protection and indeed civil law altogether, the unintended consequences of public policy, the snail's pace at which these processes move, the stupidity, obtuseness - and yes, no doubt, sometimes frank corruption - of certain officials… All of this does go on. All of it is a national problem, here and in every other country in the world. And I agree that solicitors have a bad rep - you should hear what my barrister brother-in-law says about them, the air turns blue! - which doesn't help when you're trying to find a conscientious and effective one. But I feel that your wife's comparatively straightforward case has been used by FACT to further their own agenda - and you're the one who's paid for it, in grief, exhaustion, stress and possibly even cash. With friends like that, who needs the Establishment for an enemy..?

I agree with you that many things work better in America, in particular the availability of information and the rights of access to it. But you might take a second to think about how much extra fun you'd be having if you also had to manage the financing and administration of your wife's acute and ongoing treatment, and say a little prayer of thanks to Nye Bevan. The NHS isn't perfect, it's insanely expensive on a national level, and it too falls victim to incompetence and corruption; but when I read round this forum I really do appreciate how lucky we are to have it.

What matters, though, is what happens next for you and your wife. To return to your initial question on this thread, if you can't face the guardianship application process, don't forget that it doesn't have to be you who does it. It can be any person who can practically undertake to manage your wife's finances and also her health and welfare. But it would be better if it were you, wouldn't it? - if only simply because you're with her all the time.

If I were you, I would concentrate on the future, work out what you want to happen, and plan your route to it. If it really is a question of the time to fill in the form, or a mental block that makes you understandably unable to face doing it, have you thought of asking a social worker? Enfield Adult Social Services might suggest someone to give you a hand so that all you have to do is read it through and sign it.

If you're getting tired of banging your head against the wall, you could always compile a case file and send it to Private Eye, by the way. Or The Oldie, where Richard Ingrams hangs out these days. They enjoy nothing more than a good punch-up with misbehaving officialdom, and it might be a relief to hand it over to someone else. I just feel there must be better things for you to do with your time and energy. Wishing you well.

Were you in fact able to receive any compensation?
Over here applying for disability is the same nightmare even if you have private disability insurance. You end up having to hire a lawyer who will take 25% of the settlement even though you are responsible for the tax on 100% of the award.

Yes. Sadly your and your wife's story seems to have a good deal of the self-fulfilling prophesy to it.

So what is your purpose in applying for guardianship at this stage? The process itself, while tedious, doesn't seem to be a real obstacle. What would you like to achieve, exactly, in terms of caring for your wife and planning a decent quality of life for both of you?

Hi Countrymouse, after my wife's accident a group member from, Families Against Court of Protection Theft, got in touch with me after watching my videos on my wife's accident.

They warned me about the possibilities of what could happen to my wife and me because there is a huge amount of compensation involved. I must say everything that they had warned me about has come true.

The professor at Bart’s Hospital told me what you see is what you get, there was nothing else they could do for her, after knowing the problems I could get seeking for help, I decided that I was prepared to go it alone, without any intervention of the authorities.

After listening to what the group had to say, and the entire problem these poor people had to go through just because they love their family member. I had decided to help them by making a video on their strive to obtain justice for their family member, the daughter in the video I made was jailed for 3 months for talking about her mother's case, apparently this is quite common.

Well as for my wife's claim for compensation after 10 1/2 years, what the people in the group told me came true, I have just got the police fraud department to look into our case, and waiting their reply,

After experiencing such horrors with the accident the last thing we needed was a corrupted legal and judicial system, as far as getting the authorities involved, we certainly do not need any more problems on our hands.

Colin, if you already have a decade's experience of dealing with this then clearly you're having problems with the OPG, your local authority and the various brain injury charities, carers' organisations and so on that I would otherwise recommend. What's the difficulty with arranging for a carer to come to your home, while you're there, to give you the time you need for the paperwork?

You're rather implying some kind of skulduggery back there, I assume it's related to your wife's claim for compensation. What went on?

Hi Veronica, you could have been married a lifetime and it does not matter by law, the minute you lose mental capacity in the UK or the US you basically our own by the government, Court of protection in the UK I think its call guardianship in the US, the spouse would have to apply for a guardianship order, something that very few people know of until you're confronted with it, in my case my wife's brain injury I believe it also goes for dementia and Alzheimer's patients.

Well I could give you tremendous amount of information on it, some of it pretty scary, this website I believe you cannot post the link and it does not have private messaging service but if you are interested give me your name for a website that does.

colinberry. I am so sorry for your wife's condition. I am English but have lived in the US since 1977. I had fondly hoped that there was less corruption in the UK than the US. Why do you need Guardianship for your wife? As her husband can you not legally make decisions for her if she is not capable? Sorry I don't actually have an answer maybe someone else in the UK can help.

Hi geewiz & blannie thanks very much for answering, I have been a carer for 10 1/2 years it is extremely destructive, and to see the one you love slowly depreciating away.

My problem has always been I never trusted our system, in my business I saw a lot of malpractice and so did my wife also being a carer herself.

I feel sometimes that I have died and return the hundred times, determined to help my wife all the way if possible, it sounds as if you are both in the united states, I'm sorry to say there is far more corruption in all authorities over here in the UK more then the states, it is only because of the wonderful communication that you all have, it even goes for your lawyers, I am sorry to say that we have a bunch of collaborating rats that cannot be trusted.

Keep up the good work in communicating with each other over there, it is the only thing that can protect you from wrongdoing, but they will always try if there is money involved.

I agree with geewiz. You need to get some additional help whatever happens or doesn't happen with the guardianship. You can't be the only caregiver 24/7 and keep your own physical and mental health. Start making some phone calls to see what help there is available for you. How old is your wife? If she's not a senior, I'd start with the United Way or your local congress person to see what help there is available. If she's a senior, then call your local Area Agency on Aging to see if you can get her some help. Is she on Social Security Disability? Tell us more and you'll get some very good advice from the other caregivers on here who have experience with your situation.

Can you hire a nurse and/or an aide to come in for a day and do all of the errands you have on your 'to do' list? How about another family member? If that individual can't handle the care, he/she may be able to be the 'known face' for your wife while the hired team does the actual care. I don't know how long you have been at this, but no one person can handle 24/7 care for extended periods of time. And there are outside matters that need to be handled. Alternatively, some attorneys will come to your home (at an additional charge). But that will mean you are away from your wife anyway. Good luck.