What happens when someone passes at a nursing home?

Dun, I'm so sorry for your loss. (((Hugs)))

Thank you everyone for your helpful answers.

My mom passed this past Saturday (12/21) around 4am. The NH called me when it happened. I sat with her all day on Friday and finally went home to sleep in a bed, and they called about 2 hours later. I was disappointed that I wasn’t there to hold her hand, but I think she was waiting for me to leave.

I went to NH to see her off. Funeral home came to pick her up shortly after I arrived. We made small talk about my neighbor, who used to work with them and was in hospice. The NH had changed her into a pretty nightgown and brushed her hair and generally made her presentable.

On Sunday, I met with the funeral home to make the arrangements. There is a funeral trust to pay for final expenses. Incidentally, the funeral home told me that my neighbor had passed, which made me cry more. He was a wonderful man. He had some kind of cancer. I feel for his wife. I’m sure there were gifts under their tree for him.

Monday morning I called VA, VA fiduciary hub, pension fund, VA Nat’l Cemetery scheduling office. She and her husband will be able to be in the Nat’l Cemetery in Salisbury, which is about 40 minutes from my house.

The funeral home said they would contact SSA. The NH said they would contact DHHS (Medicaid).

I haven’t yet received word about the status of the death certificate. It being the holidays, I don’t expect this until at least today. The funeral home won’t cremate till they have the death certificate.

Bank accounts are all in my name. The NH was getting her SSA direct deposited to their account. The NH was holding back something like $70/month from her SSA as spending money. Will they send me a check for that or do I need to ask for it? There was a balance owed, would they keep it? (Medicaid had lowered her patient liability for a couple months when they thought she was getting more than she was; when they fixed it, it was not retroactive, hence there is now a balance on her NH account.)

I think the only party I need to notify now is her health insurance?

Again, thank you all for the helpful advice and suggestions. This forum has been a wonderful resource.

I suppose every experience is different, it is best to check to see what you are responsible for.

You need to discuss with the nursing home.
Every one / organization may be a little different.

You need to take the lead here and call all these organizations.
You will need to acquire Death Certificate(s) (I believe from the funeral director).

While some of us can respond from our own experience, you need to get FIRST HAND information by calling, taking notes, noting date and time of calls / conversations. If it is 'too much' for you, hire an attorney and ask them to handle it all.


The nursing home I dealt with already knew who to call as it was on the application form. Did you fill out any information? Ask nursing home administrator about this.

I notified Soc Sec.
And all other financial institutions.

Do not presume anyone will do anything without your permission - and often the permission needs to be written. If you are the POA, it is your responsibility to handle / insure it is set up and that everyone / organization is notified.

Gena / Touch Matters

Do you have a funeral home chosen?
If so the Nursing home can notify the funeral home and they will come.
If your LO is on Hospice Hospice will notify the funeral home.
The Nursing home will notify you or other family that your LO has died if you are not there. If someone from Hospice is there they may call you instead of the Nursing home.
You do not need to notify Social Security. The Funeral Home will do that.
Depending on the date of death and when her check is deposited be prepared for that check to be taken back.
Notify any agency that is sending checks to her.

I am also in NC. My Dad passed this past February. Ironically, a day after his 84th birthday.
Upon his 2 am passing, the nursing home contacted me and provided me time to get there and have some private time with him. They had asked for our funeral home preference when he was admitted. They contacted them when I left the facility. The funeral home took care of contacting Social Security and Medicare. I had to contact the pension company and the Worker’s Compensation people, providing them with a death certificate. The death certificates are done through the funeral home also, and they were taking 10 days at that time. So, just know that you don't have to hurry. Once SS stopped his direct deposit, the Bank knew of his passing and freezes the account. I was listed as a signatory on his account, but not as a joint owner. So, the funds had to be transferred to his estate account.
As for his items at the nursing home, they allowed me plenty of time to pick up what I wanted. Anything we didn't want they distributed to other residents or saved for their annual sale to their employees. I do know that is not the case at all facilities, especially if the resident is on Medicaid. These beds are usually in high demand and clearing out the rooms as quickly as possible is important, so they can get someone else in the room. Seems insensitive, but facilities are a business with many expenses that need to be paid.( I have also worked at a senior living business, so I know firsthand.)

I can't advise on the VA items as my Dad was not a veteran.

Feel free to reach out if you have any questions. I am still going through the process, and learning as I go. Fortunately, I have an attorney handling the estate to keep me on track.

dunazee: Prayers sent for this most difficult of times.

I live in NC also. The nursing home should contact the funeral home to have your Mom picked up, if she is a DNR. If she is a full code they will contact the EMS. Upon her death the hospital will ask you what funeral home to have pick her up. If you haven't chosen one, you may want to choose and let the nursing home know.
SSA will be notified, but you will want to call SSA to make sure that they do not send another deposit, since they will want those funds back since she has not lived the whole month. SSA says the deposits made are for that month, not the prior month. And they don't pro-rate for days alive during a month. Yes, ridiculous.
You will want to get contact numbers for anyone else that provides her with monies and let them know. Also to ensure funds don't get sent that need to be returned. This is a bigger issue if someone dies close to a deposit date.
Her bank account may be frozen. Ask her bank ahead of time what happens to your payee status when she dies. Most likely you will be seen then as executive of the estate instead of payee. Ask the bank what papers you will need to manage her estate bank finances.
Probate may need to be done, depending on the size of her estate, whether her assets have pre-assigned beneficiaries, and whether she had a living trust or not. You will need to contact her life insurance agency. They will probably want a death certificate.
Typically any assets that have beneficiaries pre-assigned, such as bank CDs, life insurance, etc don't go through probate.
Get at least 5 copies of the death certificate, since other entities will want them. The funeral home provides you with these for a fee. Ask for a few more than you think you will need.
The nursing home will want their money, and part of probate is for anyone with a claim against her estate to make the claim. This includes the nursing home. Ask their finance office if they prorate their charges for only the days she is there in a month that she dies.
In short, you want to find out as much as possible before her death.
I hope this helps.

My sister was a little confused and unfocused a few days before her death but there was no warning that she was near the end. We visited on Saturday. On Monday my niece talked to her for about three hours. On Tuesday she was gone.

When the NH found my sister she was unresponsive, they called 911 and the paramedics worked on reviving her because she was full code. She refused DNR. The paramedics tried to call the guardian (my brother) and her son but couldn't reach them in the middle of the night. I was third on the list and got the call.

They wanted permission to stop CPR etc and pronounce her death. I told them her wishes to be full code but I wish I could tell them to stop. The paramedic thanked me and said they would continue to honor her wishes and they continued to try to revive her while still trying to reach my brother who had the authority to tell them to stop. About 30 minutes later, they reached my brother and her son and they pronounced her death. Sigh.

My advice: be sure to have multiple people on the contact list. I'd encourage people to be DNR if that's okay with the patient. My sister was probably gone when they found her unresponsive.

Thanks for listening.
Coolchinchilla

I live in Michigan. When dad passed, my brother told the nurse which funeral home. The funeral home took him. The nursing home notified his insurance, Medicaid, and Medicare. I had already given the funeral home the information regarding his life insurance. They contacted me as his payee. His pension was then transferred to my mom, who is also in a nursing home. The life insurance paid the funeral home directly and the remainder was sent to me. I elected to clean out his room, instead of having the nursing home staff do it. I donated items that could be used by other residents. I hope this helps. I was like you and had no idea what to do. It turned out that a lot is handled by the nursing home and funeral home.

I am with Willie here.

When Mom was admitted to her NH, it was then they were told what Funeral home she would be going to. The day she passed, she was on Hospice, I had visited and left 20 min before she was declared. When I got the call I told them to call the funeral home and they went and got Mom. By law, the Funeral Home has to notify Social Security of the death. When SS is notified, so is Medicare. Medicaid is notified by the Nursing Home. You may need to call a former employer about any pension and benefits she may receive from them. I was Executor too but, that really is not in effect until Probate excepts the Executor and they are given a short certificate to handle the estate. That cannot happen until a few days after death.

Even though her pension check goes directly to the NH, you need to call the employer to stop payment. Same thing with the Advantage plan, you need to tell them she passed. I suggest you make a list and check the names off as you do it.

Reading the responses has been interesting. In nursing homes here we are asked what our preferred funeral home is as part of the admissions process so that information is already on file, timing of removal of the body depends on when the funeral home staff is available for pick up. It's also common in many nursing homes to have a little "ceremony" after someone has died and staff may say a few words and form an honour guard as the body is wheeled out, families may be present at this time if they choose to be (I chose to leave immediately after my mom died so didn't witness any of that). After death you have 24 hours to clear out their possessions, so having a plan in place to do that is essential.

When my grandmother died, the nursing home got the ball rolling with the funeral home and it was a domino effect from there. My grandmother died at night and someone from the funeral home we used called my mom not too long after we got the news. My grandmother pre-paid her funeral back in 2010. Health insurance and social security will take care of themselves and you'll get one final nursing home bill. As far as I know, the only things my mom will need to tend to will be my grandmother's bank accounts, her final set of taxes, and eventually, the estate sale at her house. My mom plans on donating the clothes at my grandmother's house to our local Salvation Army.

The nursing home will allow you to claim your loved ones possessions, unless you want them to keep various things. My mom opted to give the clothes my grandmother and great-grandmother had when they both died to the nursing home.

The Nurse let me Know My Brothers breath was shallow and a couple Hours Later he had Passed. I called the Funeral Home and they Picked up the Body . The Next day I gathered My brothers belongings and went to the NH and Paid the Bill .

One thing that surprised me when my brother died was the nursing home's call, needing the funeral home to pick up his body immediately. I was glad I somehow had all that arranged with the phone number available to give them at 2:30 am with tears running down my face at the news. Then, a year later, I knew what to tell the hospice people for my mom. Hospice does a good job with getting the information from and to you, and to carry through on everything at death. There are lists you can google for all else that you need to do. Make sure you get any over payments back from nursing home, SSA, etc.

What will most likely happen? Days before death, facility will reach out to ask what funeral home they will call. After death, they'll call funeral home to remove the body ASAP (Decomp starts immediately after death, so no staying there any longer then need be). They'll remove the body in a way that the other residents won't know someone has passed so as not to upset them.

Once the body is out of the building, funeral home takes over. You'll only hear from facility for business matters and to remove any belongings. As far as notifying goes, once the SSN is noted as belonging to a deceased person, it is a domino affect with anything that the number was used for will be notified (credit cards, Social Security, VA, etc). Notices will be sent regarding the deceased, (usually with condolences mentioned).

That's mostly it in a nutshell.

I'll only deal with the notification aspects of the death. Right now get all the bank account numbers, insurance policy numbers, pension accounts, phone numbers, SSN, DOB, any military service records, etc pulled together into a tidy list. Get a copy of the will if at all possible. Make certain that your first call after family and the funeral home is to the Social Security office. DO NOT COUNT ON THE FUNERAL HOME TO DO THIS. It's a simple automated call and means that they will be notified in time to STOP payment on the next check. Then just start calling through the list of everyone you need to notify. Do not assume that any of the agencies coordinate with one another (SS, VA, etc). Usually the calls are quick if you have all the policy numbers, service numbers etc available. I was able to do this for my father in one morning with a large cup of coffee. The hardest part is getting all the info together so do it before the confusion of death occurs. And be prepared for a million "I'm so sorry for you loss" comments from the people answering the phone. My favorite phone calls were the ones where I just had to punch in numbers to an automated system and get it over with. Some of these organizations will want a copy of the death certificate when you have that available so make a note of that for later. I had all the info on my phone, including copies of all paperwork so it was a simple task. My friend, who is not well organized and had to deal with an unexpected death, spent months trying to straighten out the accounts and notifications. Organization (and coffee) is absolutely key to making this go smoothly.

So my FIL was in a VA home, and we had agreed to move him to hospice care there just a few days before he passed away.

First, it was pretty clear that he wouldn't be with us much longer. He was in a shared room at the time, and they moved his roommate to another room (two-fold - for family privacy, but also so that his roommate didn't have to live in the room as it was happening)

They called the local family in, and even offered to make space for us to spend the night if needed (he was over an hour away, so the thought was sweet, but we did just end up going back and forth over the next few days)

During his last week or so, the nursing home confirmed our funeral home of choice.

When he passed, I believe this is the order it occurred. He was pronounced. Then we were notified. The Funeral Home was contacted. And then they called us back to let us know what time the funeral home would arrive to transport him.

As the timeline was pretty tight- only DH, myself and our youngest daughter (college age) were able to get up there to meet them - it was NOT a requirement though. We went because we wanted to be there for a special event that the VA home does for veterans who have passed away. They call it the Honor Walk We waited in the lobby of the SNF. The funeral home attendant prepared him and covered his body on the gurney, and draped it with an American flag. He was on the 2nd floor, so they had to take the elevator down, but residents (who were able to) and staff line the halls and saluted or had their hands over their hearts as the National Anthem was played. Once he reached the lobby, they did a small bio about him over the intercom and then asked every one for a moment of silence. Then they played "Taps" as the funeral home attendant took him out to their transport vehicle.

Had it not been for that - we wouldn't have even have needed to be there for them to transport. The funeral home would have handled it all.

The next day we met at the funeral home and made all of the arrangements. I believe when they file for the death certificates as part of the arrangements that triggers some of the official notifications. We didn't have to notify SS or the VA. We almost immediately saw SS and VA payments that had gone into his account pulled back out (within days). His bank account was also locked down within days. So I'm fairly certain that his social security number was flagged when we requested death certificates and the county received those requests. (It was a pretty quick update).

Our arrangements came with 10 death certificates. We didn't end up needing more, because some places just wanted scanned copies and emails, some just wanted copies and others wanted the originals. In some cases we could get them to provide the original back

As Geaton said, the executor of the estate takes over. As soon as we had the death certificates, DH immediately filed the will and got his Letters of Testamentary so that he could begin handling the estate.

If the appropriate agencies are NOT notified though through the end of life process with the NH and FH, I would think the executor would handle those notifications. But they will need the appropriate paperwork to prove they are allowed to do that in most cases.

I will leave the financials until you need this information.
As to imminent death, if your loved one is on Hospice care then they will guide you and can even guide you in choosing a reputable funeral establishment. In my brother's case he wanted simple cremation and no services.

Call funeral homes in your area and feel free to explore. Let them know what she would want in terms of services and DO NOT get roped into any pre-need nonsense. Just ask to be reassured they will accept her for the services you/she wishes to have.

As to death and what happens, call the admins at your establishment. Most often the person dies, the coroner or the doctor is called to "pronounce death". If there's a recent fall sometimes there is coroner request for autopsy. You would be notified as next of kin. You would be asked for the name of your preferrred establishment.

As to SS and all of that, yes, the Funeral Establishment notifies them.
You should notify at least one credit agency, either transunion, equifax or the other I cannot think of at the moment. They will notify the other.

You are, if you are speaking of someone on Medicaid, not going likely to have to even file probate. But this is all to be decided after death.

There is a good small book (and likely many others) through Amazon called "Please don't die but if you DO die what do I do next?" (


Amazon
https://www.amazon.com/Please-Dont-Die…

Please Don't Die, But if You Do, What Do I Do Next?: …

Jun 19, 2012 · Please Don't Die, But if You Do, What Do I Do Next?: A Practical and Cost Saving Guide for the Estate Executor [Grube, Kurt J., Grube Esq., Keith S., Nevola, John E.] on Amazon.com. *FREE* shipping on qualifying offers.

It will have answers to many of your questions and is inexpensive.

Thank you, Geaton. I am on her contact list at the NH, and her PoA and medical PoA. I would handle anything that comes up regarding her estate, as there isn't much outside of her personal belongings.

Are you on the contact list of her NH? Are you her medical PoA? If so they will call to inform you as soon as a doctor determines she is deceased. Then you inform the NH what funeral home. The funeral home or crematory comes to take the body. They will ask how many death certificates you want. I would ask for 5. The Executor of her estate takes over doing things once she passes. I never had to inform SS or Medicare but I did for everything else.