Follow
Share
Read More
Here I am.

I'm a man, taking care of my elderly sister. Haven't been online for a long time. I need to get something off my chest. It's not about my sister.

Have you ever wished for the destruction of someone? I have. Here I am (yup, that's my name!), right now wishing for it.

Some people really deserve it. I wish for their utter destruction, and I don't mean death. That's too easy. I mean, alive but suffering. Some people seriously deserve it. I have certain people in mind.

I woke up this morning, with this strong thought. Never happened to me before. I don't normally wake up like that. The thought: destroy, destruction, I wish for their destruction, they deserve it.

Please don't misunderstand: I'm not going to do anything. I just wish it.
(0)
Report

Hereiam, you are understandable burnt out, and desperately need a break and answers how to get more help with your sister. My burnt out moment was the second time I drove home from moms , not caring if I lived.

Now I'm on this incredible journey, of self help. Please get some counseling, you are not the first or the last
(1)
Report

Good luck Anxietynacy!
My post has nothing to do with my sister, nor with caring for her.

Sometimes here, we share our thoughts that have nothing to do with caregiving. I tried to make it clear in my post, by saying it’s not about my sister.

It’s about some people who do very bad things to other people, and who therefore deserve bad things to happen to them.
(1)
Report

Here I am,
I am sorry to see you harbor feeling of revenge against someone. They old saying goes something about "When you seek revenge dig two graves" and it is so right. This level of anger destroys not the other person, but ourselves and it eats us from the inside out.
I recommend you seek help from a few visits to a cognitive therapist. It's normal to feel anger; it isn't normal to hang on to it over time.
(2)
Report

Cwillie:
Yes, any case of unexpected death at home is a coroner's case. However that will be VERY short and sweet in the case of a 90 year old. Almost always is. A trip to the medical examiner, autopsy, and likely listed as accidental death. I am sorry about this loss. It seems none were present, and likely they will be offered a simple cremation; it will just be determined who is the next of kin, who wishes to be listed administrator of the estate if no will is extant.
A good long life and one lived at home.
(0)
Report

Not revenge.
I believe in karma.

I saw Venting’s quote, “You can’t do ugly things to people and expect to live a beautiful life.”

I totally agree, and I think it happens naturally. Karma happens naturally.

No one did anything against me, so the post isn’t about me. They did something to a friend of mine. Even the courts will go against what they did. It’s not revenge. Courts are not in the business of revenge. Bad acts have consequences. Through the law. And through karma.
(1)
Report

Sorry at @hereiam there is no such thing as karma. It's a nice concept in theory but many a truly evil person has certainly not gone on the reap the reward for hurting others.
(1)
Report

Dear Sp, I understand your skepticism. And maybe you're right. After all, none of us are omniscient and know the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth about the universe. But, you might also be wrong. There might indeed be karma. I believe it.

"many a truly evil person has certainly not gone on to reap the reward for hurting others."

We don't know that for sure, Sp.
Maybe it only seems like that, in this life.
Maybe, not everything is as it seems.

The universe, life, is quite mysterious.
After all, if karma would so obviously exist, no one would dare to behave badly, and bad people would never reveal their true nature.

Here I Am
(0)
Report

@hereiam I know that for sure. I have living proof, right now that karma does not exist. It is only natural to think that good people will somehow come out on top in this world when people intentionally harm them BUT that is the exception not the rule in this universe. In fact I have seen people who hurt people go on to have much success and protection from the universe and reap no consequences of their actions.
(0)
Report

I totally understand what you're saying. And you might be right. But you might be wrong.

I wrote, in reply to what you said, "many a truly evil person has certainly not gone on to reap the reward for hurting others."

Maybe it only seems like that ----- in this life.
It depends also on one's view of what happens after this life.

Here I Am
(0)
Report

Dear Sp, "In fact I have seen people who hurt people go on to have much success and protection from the universe and reap no consequences of their actions."

I like the reply I just saw of someone on the internet, about karma:

Perhaps right now. But Karma takes time and it's not over yet. :-).  And even if they're doing "better", they may have some things going on that you don't know about. Remember that you cannot know everything about someone's life.

Here I Am
(0)
Report

So I quit a job once, because the boss was sexually harassing me. Didn't feel like going through the bs of no one believing me. Didn't like the job anyways.

Anyways I got a jod as a caregiver, took one of my clients to the library, guess who was homeless sitting in the library. The boss 🤗 He got his karma. I honestly new he would.
(3)
Report

About bad people seemingly getting away with things:
"Just because we see them acting all powerful and fine in public doesn't mean they are peaceful and happy with themselves in private. You have to see the whole picture."
(3)
Report

I think hereiam, that those people are more miserable and unhappy than most , that's why they want to try to make everyone else miserable
(2)
Report

So true!
(1)
Report

Hereiam, I think karma is total nonsense. But then I am a non-believer.
(3)
Report

Did someone call my name?
I confirm I exist. Everything happens at the right time…

You just keep doing you, which is already a full-time job.
(3)
Report

Alva I'm not a big believer in karma either, I just believe if people keep doing the things that are wrong the eventually get caught.

I was friends a man who did some really crappy stuff to his aging mom. He never forgave himself. He ended up in jail, for covering up his sons crimes. I think some people that can't forgive themselves, keep doing stupid stuff because they don't feel that they deserve better.

We all have done dom hurtful things to people, it's all about learning not to do it again.
(0)
Report

Out of curiosity, I checked reddit to see more or less, how many people who comment there, believe in karma. I thought it would be 50/50.

It's more like 95% don't believe in karma, 5% do.

Personally, I've never seen karma at work in my life. As in, I've never seen people who did bad things get what they deserve, in my opinion. And I've seen plenty of good people have terrible things happen to them.

But despite that, I believe in karma. It's like a deep belief in order in the universe. Moral order. That one day - don't know when, there will indeed be karma, people will get what they deserve.

Hellokarma! Yes, I'll continue doing me, which as you said, is already a full-time job. I'm even doing over-time.
(0)
Report

I think what I was trying to say was I believe in karma as for , we bring are own karma, it is up to us to change ,so we don't bring bad karma into are life
(0)
Report

I really don’t believe in karma. I do believe in you reap what you sow.
(7)
Report

That's what I'm trying to say, house flower, thanks!!
(0)
Report

please find time for the things that make you feel happy to be alive.
🌸🌸🍀🍀🌸🌸🍀🍀
(5)
Report

My mom’s in MC and constantly asks “ I want to go home “ “When am I going home?” “ Why am I here?” Ugh!
(3)
Report

Haagen Daz pints are only 14oz now . 😢
(3)
Report

Most premium ice creams are only 400 - 450 ml in Canada and because of that (in my province at least) they are now classified as single serving items and taxed too.... yeah, no thanks.
(4)
Report

arkh64 - Very frustrating, Maybe you can distract her. Easier said than done sometimes.

Thank goodness I don't eat ice cream anymore - unless I make it.

My whine today is about sore abdominals. I did a major trip on something and didn't fall, but oh my obliques and more are sore!!! Shows me that's an area I need to work on - side bends at least. It only hurts when I laugh, or cough or bend or...

Also I haven't been able to get a doctor yet. I am on two waiting lists. For my prescription meds I can see the pharmacist again who will send me for a TSH blood test first or go to a walk in clinic, so my immediate needs are met. I don't need another drivers medical till summer 2025 so I am Ok there, I guess getting prescriptions and getting a family doctor are two different exercises. Sigh. One of my reasons for moving here was better medical care! Hah!!! My son who just arrived here found one quickly near him. He won't tell me who he is,🤔
(4)
Report

Thanks for listening, and all the kindness this forum gives me. I need to vent. I'm really going through a lot. All out of my control. If I would describe even just one of the numerous problems, it would seem made up. I seriously considered writing a book about it. (I'm not a writer).

I tried to think what advice I would give a friend, if they were going through what I'm going through. But it's so unbelievable what I'm going through. Would seem like fiction.

I guess I'd say: take one problem at a time. Then just keep getting rid of the problems. Look at the big pile of problems, start with a small problem.

Unrelated to this, I discovered a new problem today. Someone I trusted, turned out to be a frenemy (enemy disguised as a friend). Well it's better to know now, that to never have found out. I cut them out of my life this morning.

Perhaps I, should, write that book. What would I call it? I guess that depends how it ends.

I hope I can call the book "It Ended Better Than I Ever Could Have Dreamed Of".
(6)
Report

Golden: Hope that you feel better soon.
(4)
Report

Sorry that you aren’t feeling well, Golden.
(4)
Report

Start a Discussion
Subscribe to
Our Newsletter