Not a question really, just sharing one of those moments.
I say "bye, I'm leaving. I will see you tomorrow morning" as I walk to the front door. Mom starts to get up from the sofa to follow me. I say "watch me from the window". She sits down. I go out the front door, I put the key into the lock and turn it. I wait a bit. She gets up, walks to the door, turns the lock and opens the door just a crack. I shout into the crack "mom, shut and lock the door and watch me from the front window". She opens the door all the way and announces, "What? (I repeat my request two more times) She then replies "But, I want to watch you as you drive ALL the way down the street until I can't see you any more and then I will lock the door. She remains in the doorway as I walk to the car. I go around the block, stop and check my phone to watch her from the indoor security camera as she closes the front door without turning the lock and returns to the sofa.
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It is a very old door and I might have to replace both the door and the lock to install a smart lock. Replace keys for cleaner and home health aid (we use a key lock with combination that holds a spare). And the best part, train my mother how the new door handle would work. She has to be able to open it to receive her meals on wheels. I currently have a door sensor that alerts me when the door opens and again when it closes. Unfortunately, it does not tell me if the lock has be set.
I spent endless hours trying to figure out how to keep her bathroom door closed to keep the room warm enough for me to bathe her. Finally I placed a laminated poster on the door "Please keep this door closed so that it stays warm". Cute little photos of animals. After her repeated attempts to remove the sign, she freaked out. Hallucinations about people "writing all OVER the walls!" Went on for a couple of hours, motioning with her hands to the ceiling, upper walls, etc. I did not relent. She forgot about it and now closes the door after she uses the bathroom.
Yes, I like the smart lock concept. I just got to steel my nerves, plan my strategy and leap into the fray.
You do realize, though, that Mom will not always be like this. The time will come she can't be alone. I took Mom in when she could no longer figure the phone out or the TV remote. She left a pan on the stove. I was lucky that my nephew lived with her but he did work. When she went to the AL I had them remove the microwave because I was afraid she would put something in it she shouldn't. Found the paper towels in the frig.