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I have nothing to hide, but I also don't have all the receipts. Part of me says comply the other says not to. My dad likes to play the victim, not to get anyone in trouble just for the attention. Now I am being investigated/interrogated and I don't have proof. Does anyone know what's best?

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Why would you take your father out of the hospital against medical advice???? And why would some part of you be saying not to comply with APS as well? You are setting yourself up for more trouble than you can possibly imagine right now! I'd print out all the credit card receipts to find a trail of what you've spent dad's money on, for starters. Then I'd comply 100% with APS and whoever else comes along, and stop making up your own rules here!
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Reply to lealonnie1
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Comply with APS. If you have bank statements or any other documentation showing that you have been using his money for his needs like medications, food, rent and other necessities, this should suffice.

How did APS get involved in the first place? Do you live with your father or is he in a care facility? Did you dad call them?

We need more information to be able to give better suggestions.
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Reply to Scampie1
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Areyou4real Aug 3, 2024
I brought him to the hospital for retaining water in his legs I think it's called edema. Well they took care of that and he had been in the hospital for 4 or 5 days I think and he told me he wasn't sick he wanted to go home I talked to the doctors and they said he should stay there because they're trying to get all his doctors together and the family to see what to do with him. We asked if he was still sick they said no so we said we're going to take him home and then they called APS for taking him against medical advice.
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Are you the POA?
If you are POA and have been spending your father's funds for his care, did you not understand that you needed meticulous records?

You will need to comply and I would do this as graciously and as thoroughly as you are able. If you did not know that you needed records of expenditures then be honest with those investigating. You may be facing charges of elder fraud and abuse and this is not to be taken lightly. If you have acted wrongly in innocence or ignorance of the requirements, then be honest about this with those investigating. Provide everything you possibly can in writing as to what you spent, on what you spent it, and when and why.
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Reply to AlvaDeer
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Edema is not something that you treat and then you are well.
Discovering the cause is of paramount importance.

Severe heart or lung disease, kidney disease, cancer.

Following up on an outpatient basis can still be done.
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Reply to Sendhelp
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Do your best to comply. Give bank and credit card statements. Say that you don't keep all the receipts. Who does??

Did your father say your were exploiting him? If so, time to turn the reins over to someone else. It's hard enough to do all this work but then to be falsely accused of wrong doing? No thanks.
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Reply to againx100
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Yes comply, not compling would look guilty on your part.

If you did nothing wrong, you shouldn't have anything to worry about. I believe they are good at telling when people are lying or if anything is fishy. So don't lie be honest. Most people don't save receipts.

Best of luck.
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Reply to Anxietynacy
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I read your reply in the comments as to why APS is in your lives.

Unless your father has been declared (by a doctor) mentally incompetent and unable to make his own decisions, none of you including your father, owe anyone an explanation for anything.

Many times healthcare and social work "professionals" will use intimidation tactics on a family when really they don't have a legal leg to stand on. This would be because many of these people receive incentives to get a person placed in a certain facility or rehab or to get the signed up with certain homecare agencies that are affliated to them in some way or other.

Unless you are a court-appointed POA or conservator for your father, you don't owe APS a damn thing and you don't answer to them. I had a couple of dealings with APS once on a private-duty care case I was working and once when the nursing home my parent was in was demanding I hand over POA to them. Both times they were told to get a warrant. I wasn't doing anything wrong and neither are you.

You don't owe them receipts or bank statements. You don't have to keep records of what got paid and to whom. You owe them nothing. So give them nothing. You are not your father's legal representative. Even if you were, you would be answering to the probate court, not APS.

These people are just shaking the tree to see what falls out of it. Don't give into them. You are under no legal obligation to answer to these people. If they shake it too hard, petition the court for a restraining order against this harassment.

Get yourself to a lawyer though. First meetings are usually free. You do not owe APS an explanation for your father's finances and neither does he. If a sheriff serves you with papers to appear in court, then you MAY have to answer some questions. You do not have to now.
Also, if your father is not in a care facility, has no immediate plans to get put in one, and no one's looking to get him on Medicaid - no one will have to offer any explanations.

My guess here is your father probably ran his mouth in the hospital about you stealing from him and played the victim as you said to get attention and now it's rolled back on him and everyone else.

I wouldn't worry if I were you. Not unless you get a court summons.

Talk to a lawyer though. For your own peace of mind.

If the court appoints a conservator/guardian and financial POA over your father, let them. That's not on you.
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Reply to BurntCaregiver
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Scampie1 Aug 5, 2024
Burnt, you hit the nail on its head every time. I wish I knew this when my older sister called them on me. It is usually a family member or a social worker who does this. I had them calling me at home and on my job. The harassment was ongoing. The problem was I was already in the process of getting my sister placed in a group home. Until this day, my older sister thought she was responsible for the placement. Fast forward, older sister is currently in a rehab going through cognitive decline. APS was called on me because she thought she should have inherited the family home.
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This is a bit hard to understand, and it would be good to get the story straight before you see APS. You say that you asked the doctors “if he was still sick, they said no”, but also that they (she? the hospital?) are “trying to get all his doctors together and the family to see what to do with him”. You also say that F “likes to play the victim, just for the attention”.

APS may have been told that you have been exploiting him financially (or it may be something they always check), but they may also be getting very confusing stories about what’s best for him medically. If F actually wants to come home, it would be good to tell him that all this is likely to stop you taking him, and he should be clear and honest.
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Reply to MargaretMcKen
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Just read your reply. These doctors suspected something. Maybe that Dad needed more care than you could have provided.

When you are spending someone elses money, you keep records. My Moms bank statement showed the money going in and the money going out. TG, for a fee, our bank had pictures of the checks.
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Reply to JoAnn29
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Show the receipts. If you were taking care of his finances because he wasn’t able to you should have gotten a financial POA. Anyhow, ANY time you are paying anyone’s bills for them it is YOUR responsibility to get a receipt and keep those receipts to prove where your father’s money was spent on.
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Reply to loyalone
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MargaretMcKen Aug 5, 2024
That's not actually true. If you are paying anyone's bills for them, it's up to them to decide whether to make it a condition of reimbursement that you keep and show them the receipts. If anyone else wants to see the receipts, it depends on whether they have any rights to demand them. Very few agencies have those rights. Medicaid can deny payments if they show that reimbursement was a 'gift', that's about it.
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