I cared for my parents before they went into a care home. They both have different types of late stages dementia. However, now that they are there, I still find I am really out of pocket for all the hours I put in sorting things out for them plus the outings etc.
My question is as a POA am I entitled to withdraw my mum and dad’s pension each month to pay for petrol, running the car which is needed to take them out, buying them clothes, having coffee or meals out, hairdresser appts, podiatry etc etc? The list goes on.
I don’t want to do this if it’s not allowed but I am at breaking point financially as I am a 1950s UK woman whom the Govt decided to withhold my state pension till I am 66. I am only 63 and don’t see how I can get through it. I am exhausted from seeing to them, never mind trying to hold down a job if Ailsa could get one. Any answers gratefully received.
Note that I am not paying myself anything for "time spent" - just reimbursing for money that I have spent on her.
I do not know UK rules and laws, but I would expect that you can be reimbursed for expenses that are directly related to your parents, clothing, their meals when you take them out, hair etc. I am sure the UK has a mileage rate to cover car expenses when you use it to take your parents out. Here in Canada is it about 52 cents per km.
I doubt very much that you can claim all the car expenses, over and above the mileage used for your parents. It would be a grey area if you paid your meals from your parents funds.
I do not believe you can use your parents pensions for all your living expenses. I know I could not in Canada.
Very important to keep the itemized receipts of any purchases, not just the cc or debit slip (staples them together when you get home).
After you verify that it is allowable, keep all receipts and if needed make little notes. Ie podiatrist visit today so took mom and dad to lunch.
They are blessed to have you adding all of the enrichment activities to their lives.
Hugs for all you do!
Here in the US we have to watch how we POAs spend money. It can effect Medicaid help if we do it wrong. Country Mouse is our in home UK person. You could private message her.
The USA discussion usually seems to be about whether the POA's spending will reduce the assets of the donor to make them eligible for USA Medicaid, which is a completely different issue. There may be regulations along the same lines in the UK, but they are unlikely to be exactly the same as the USA.
However the advice about keeping reasonable records of what you are spending and why is still really sensible, particularly if you take some recompense for the time you are spending. It will help if there are beneficiaries who are expecting more than they eventually get! In fact, if there are other beneficiaries it would probably be a good idea to talk through with them whether paying yourself for time is the best or only option. Perhaps they should have the opportunity to step up to the plate themselves, and raising the option now would help if complaints are possible.
For your peace of mind, it would be good to take a copy of the POA to a lawyer for advice on what it covers. There are options for free advice like this in the UK, so use them now and stop worrying. Best wishes, Margaret.