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We work and are unable to be with her 24/7. We reside in california, and she has ssi and sm pension, we can afford to continue taking off to take her to the pain clinic, she has hx. hip replacement, carpel tunnel and arthritis, we help is there for us. She currently has to climb stairs and I am worried about another fall. but at this time we can not afford to move.

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If your mother has no assets, she should qualify for Medi-Cal, I think it's called. I think you live in Fontana - I looked at your profile. I hope this is correct:
http://portal.countyofventura.org/portal/page/portal/VCAAA
for your local area agency on aging. They can help a lot with finding help for your mother-in-law. Good luck!
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It is a big responsibility, take a breath and reasses, it is probably not that bad, and you can get through this.

She has pension and SSI, so she is better of than many and so far she sounds somewhat independent. She can and should contribute to household expenses, I can see the electric going up a bit and food, but other household expenses like phone, cable, taxes have certainly not doubled. In my opinion all household members with income need to contribute what they can. That was the rule in my house since my first job at 15.

This is the time period for Medicare changes, my parents had/have a Medicare HMO, that was great for logistics and additional coverage. They arranged all appointments, reminded her, provided a calendar, set up transport. I was registered to get info, per HIPA requirements, and could call or send notes to the doctors, they were very accomodating. Originally I was not a fan of these doctors, being a bit of a snob, thinking I would want to personally select the best specialist for whatever came up.
Eventually, I learned many of the same "best" specialist I would have selected were subcontracted by the HMO and the primary doctors, dealing with the elderly all the time were actually pretty good medically and bedside.
Look into a HMO that has additional coverage with transportation. I agree, you cannot take time off to take her to the doctor, the hip will heal but there is always something else. A couple of HMOs in Miami also offer recreational activities and transport to them. I kid you not, it sounds like a cruise itinerary, movies, tai chi, scrapbooking, dance, Internet, Facebook, .......etc.

This HMO was a God send, it became their recreational center as well as medical facility. Additionally they have an urgent center, vision, dental.

I am not going to mention the name because I am not trying to sell it, and I believe this particular one operates in Florida only so far. I would just suggest you look into this as a possibility, if it exists in your area. I know this center has a very popular model locally, they members swear by it, and my particular experience was good.

Best of luck
L
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L has had a terrific experience in Florida with the HMO. This is another example that where you live makes a big difference in services that are available. Type your state's name and the word aging into your browser. In California, the first thing you'll see is http://www.aging.ca.gov/. There are links for finding help there. You aren't likely to have all of your problems taken care of, but you should get direction on where to look for local help.
Good luck with your search,
Carol
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