I'm looking to find speakers who can talk both the practical issues regarding independence for seniors and even importantly on the "ways of being" in order to be successful in being independent in our final years. I live in Los Angeles and I'm going to have a night of discussion, I'm not sure where to find qualified speakers. Thank you!
My husband and I have looked towards the future. He wants to leave me financially solvent if he goes first. We are not rich but have invested money that hopefully will help us when needed. We have a house that is paid off. I am 69 and I have friends who have taken on Mortgages. Unless you have insurance where if one person dies the house is paid off, then ur leaving the surviving spouse in the lurch. Why? My husband and I bring in about $3700 a month. My SS, his SS and Pension. If he goes before me, I lose 1300 a month. My SS stops and I get 60% of his pension. If I go before him, he loses 700. For me, I really don't want to be paying a mortgage on 2400 a month.
To me being independent means realizing when it is time to sell your house and find something you can transition into. Like an independent living, AL to NH set up. Not this "I want to stay in my home as long as I can". You wait too long and someone else is making decisions for you. Independence means not relying on your children to do it all for you. They have lives too. If you can afford it, pay someone to mow that lawn. Do odd jobs. The less you depend on others the more u help yourself live longer. Oh and please, none of this passive agressive stuff. My MIL used this on her boys. TG she lived far enough away we didn't have to jump everytime she felt she needed something. She really did well on her own until the last year of her life when we started seeing a decline. She lived to be almost 92.
I have said this before, I have a friend who does nothing for herself. She has been diagnosis with Parkinsons. With her other problems, diabetes and heart, she may be in a NH sooner than later. She will not sign up for the Senior bus to get to appts. Just complains she has a hard time finding drivers. (Have my reasons for not volunteering) She won't call Medicaid to see if she qualifies for homecare. She doesn't want strangers in her home. All suggestions she has a reason for not wanting to do it. Its nice when a friend volunteers but you should not depend on them.
Thanks so much on this. I'm going to try a bunch of different sources for finding speakers. I'm also going to focus on ways of being. How to approach living your final years on your own and on your own terms. What you said is really important, we have to do this on our own. I think with planning, determination and knowing this is the best way we can do it. I'm single, without kids, so this what I have to do. By the way, there is a really good article in this month's Money Magazine, called " A Solo Senior's Guide to Happiness". It's about seniors, without children & a spouse and how to approach living out our final years. Again, I'm real appreciative of your response.