What can I do for my father who keeps falling, even while under 24-hour care?

I know that this is a very simple answer to your question, but have the nurses at your Dad's facility just tried placing 2 urinals next to his bed withing easy reach for him? My husband is a stroke victim and is unable to get up at night by himself. I was getting up several times a night to take him to the bathroom, but had to come up with an alternate solution as I was exhausted during the day as was my husband. He is now able to use the urinals and go back to sleep. Sometimes we overthink a problem when the simple way turns out to be the best. God bless you and your Dad.

ya know what . sometimes u think u can hear dad hollaring . zoom i go runnin , huhhh he s sleeping real good . i swore up and down i hear dhim . even hubbyhears him hollaring every now and then . zoom to find him watching tv all happy . oh hiiiiii he says , di du hollar ? noooooo he says .
so sometimes we shake our head and thinkin its our imagainary and oops he is realy hollaring .
as for falling down . not on my watch hahaha . thats funny . it realy is funny . cuz once dad was walkin with his walker , i dare not to be far from him , walk behind him cuz he would stumble backwards . just so happen i wasnt watchin him within a blink of an eye boom he fall backwards ! holy crap ! how in the world did that happen ? i was just right behind him ! so my watch is always screwed up .
rith u better knck on the wood cuz now maybe ur watch will be screwed up .
i felt so so bad and cried at my brother . honeslty i never want dad to fall waaaaaaa . he said oh linda it just happens , he knows cuz he was watched dad down down hill for the last 30 yrs of begin with him . says maybe dad did that on purpose to see if u ll catch him ? phhhht . not on my watch mmmmm never say never cuz it happen to me too .
i understand pc and fc is totaly diffrent . aint that the truth ! there has been time my brain just shuts down and i was dead and didnt hear dad hollar and hollar , he even goty into my face and screamed , i was dead . hubby came and shook me so hard i woke up , he sai dman linda didnt u hear dad ? i said no i didnt why ? he said he s been screamin bloody murder how could u not hear that ? oh hun im so tired my brain just shut down . i honestly felt like i did died to sleep forever , good ole hubby shook the helloutta me , said he had hard time wakin me up . so i am Fc , i will never be a pc or fc when all this is over .
not on my watch hahahaha ......

Well, the higher level of care isn't stopping the falls, is it? So I'm not sure it makes sense to stay at that level just for that issue.

Is there padding on the floor, and no nearby nightstand or furniture he can hit? Is there a good night light so he can see to get out of bed?

Is his doctor aware of this problem? Did this start recently? Does your father have other sleep problems? For example, does he trash around, kick, or flail his arms?

My mom falls a lot too. We are getting a bed that sits just a couple of inches from the floor so the fall is not so far. It will also prevent her from getting up so much cause it will be hard to get up from a bed that low. Right now I have a soft restraint across her at night to prevent nite time wandering. During the day I have a sort of seat belt for the sofa to keep her from getting up every 5 min and falling. She has done a lot of damage to herself with all the falls. I'm trying my best to protect her. The alarms wouldn't work for us cause by the time I heard the alarm and got to her she would already be on the floor. Hope you get some help with this. I know it worries you.

There is a catalogue you can order from called Posey.com. They have all sorts of alarms and restraints that are very user friendly and patient friendly. Since I had to quit my job to care for mom, I don't have much money and to me they are more than I can afford so I have to be creative. I have a long soft bathrobe belt that is tied on one side of mom's bed and I pull it across her waist loosely enough so she can roll over and it won't be uncomfortable, but it does keep her from getting off the bed. That is the only way I can get any sleep at all. I have a baby monitor in her room, but she is very quiet and I never hear the rustle of covers. Possibly because I'm so exhausted from caring for her all day. She is very well hydrated and has very good nutrition. Strokes, dementia and cancer has made her lose her sense of balance. Having both arms injured also works against her balance wise.

With all due respect, Ruth, that was a very insensitive and self serving remark. No falling on MY watch? How long does your watch last? Do you just care for them at night then go home in the morning? Are you being paid to watch them? Most of us caregivers are 24 hrs a day 7 days a week with no breaks in between.

Also most of us are not paid to care for our loved one. Most of us are financially strapped and have lost many of the pleasures of life that we once had. Some have helpful siblings but most don't. I have to beg to get my siblings to come stay with her for a few hours every once in a while for me to do errands or go shopping at the local Goodwill store.

I'm sure you were just joking with that statement, but for those of us who are mentally, physically and financially depleted, that sounded like you were saying that you are able to do something that we have failed to do adequately. That's hard to listen to. I am perhaps being a bit too touchy about it but chalk it up to sheer exhaustion and try to understand. Most of us are looking for support not judgement.

Jaccare, I hope you find the answers to your problems. Michfla317 sounds like we had the same idea. I have also rigged up a seat belt of sorts for the sofa. It is a fabric tie that my hubby used sort of like a bungie to hold boards together in his truck. I took the big buckle off and used one of my fabric belts with rings that the belt is threaded through and attached it to the fabric strap that I had attached to the back legs of the sofa and brought it up through the sofa. I can belt it aroung her so that she can sit up or lie down but not get up off the sofa. I also have taken a wireless door bell and put the push button on one of my grandkids wooden blocks and taped it down. If she needs me all she has to do is push the door bell and I'm right there. That gives me a chance to do dishes and laundry without worrying about her getting up and trying to follow me and then fall. I call it my Redneck Life Alert. Hey, you gotta do what you gotta do.

Yes, annt, Ruth does get paid for caregiving. Yes, she does get to go home when her shift is over. If I hired her to watch my loved one overnight so I could get some sleep, I would want/expect her to have the attitude that he wasn't going to fall on her watch! I'm sorry that you took this as a criticism of full time caregivers who have to sleep at night. I didn't read it that way at all, and I kinda doubt Ruth meant it that way.

Annt makes a very valid point - tired and mentally drained or not, and with no disrespect intended to paid caregivers (most of us would LOVE being able to afford a paid caregiver) - but its apples and oranges.
Paid Caretakers (PC) vs. Family Caretakers (FC)
A PC is doing a job they were hired to do and is being compensated for that work, sometimes with benefits. Most family FC positions are not paid, (in fact it costs families BIG BUCKS to care take - you can look it up), and many must hold either PT or FT jobs outside the home in order to support the family.
A PC has another life when their shift ends, same as the person who works on the assembly line or checks your groceries. The PC gets to leave - they get to go to dinner with friends, or cruise the mall, or go on a date, or spend an uninterrupted evening of amore - anything they want. As long as they remember to set their alarm clock and return to their job on time - their time away from the job is theirs to do as they please. Most FC live in the home of their elder, or their elder lives with them. Some are all alone in this - some have other family members around - some have other family members around who will occasionally help them. Others have family members around who resent the time and attention paid to the elder and make this fact known.
A PC can take a vacation, call in sick, or quit. Their obligation is that of an employee - not as a son or daughter or other family member. A FC doesn't have these options. Many rarely leave the house, don't have the option of staying in bed with the flu, and know if they quit (which many fantasize about doing), their elder will be forced into a NH (possibly substandard and/or not nearby), or taken by another family member whose main interest is to clean out the elders bank account. Many FC did not CHOSE their roles, but had it thrust upon them by circumstance. They do what they do because it needs to be done, and they have a sense of moral obligation.
A PC is not carrying on the necessary, ongoing, and routine work of an entire household. They may make a meal, wash a dish, do some laundry, and the like. But most aren't trying to figure out how to pay the electric bill, cleaning the upstairs bathrooms, changing the kitty litter, or mowing the grass, etc. FC's either have to let these things slide (you should see my grass with all this rain) or they accomplish them when they should be resting.
A PC may develop an emotional attachment to the elder (and one would hope they would). But a FC has had an emotional attachment to the elder, in my case, for more than 50 yrs. Sometimes this is a loving attachment i.e. "Mom did so much for me growing up - how could I not do this for her?" Sometimes FC's end up caring for elders who weren't so loving - they were abusive, or absent, or addicts, or indifferent - we still have emotional attachments to be sure, but they may include bitterness or resentment or even hatred for wrongs FC's may even find unforgiveable. A PC does not have this history, or this complexity.
I could go on and on about the differences between the PC and the FC, but alas, as a FC my daily priority is my elder - and heaven forbid she has fallen while I was writing this - when I should have been resting. But I learned a long time ago - and I have been at this for YEARS - that it is impossible to watch my elder 24/7. I do my best to keep my elder safe and clean and warm and fed and well-tended, and I strive to do it with kindness and understanding. I can't afford a PC. If I could, the most basic of assumptions I would make about their services is that they would not let my elder fall. In the meantime I keep 911 on speed dial so I can get some assist in helping her up if she does.

Mom has PD, arthritis, and osteop. She uses a walker and is generally not so steady on her feet. To date, she has not had a fall. I chalk this up to an army of guardian angels watching over her when I and others cannot. Could it happen one day? Yes, even if I was with her 24/7 it could happen. So I would not fault a facility, caregiver, or family member if she should fall in their care. Having said that, if a family member is falling, on a regular basis, in a care facility I would be climbing someone's frame. They would have to put in in writing how they were going to keep the falls from happening again or I would report them and even take legal action. Really.....businesses that deal with the elderly and infirm should have the most sophisticated processes to keep this from happening. I am a rookie and even I found, online, a very soft, padded criss-cross harness that can be used in a wheel chair or regular chair. It is a simple item that can save so much pain and time in the hospital and rehab.

As for our fellow forum member, Ruth...let's all give her a big 'ol break. She made her comment with a wink and a nudge and doubt she was lauding her skills over family caregivers. Her job is to work with clients who are at the end of their lives. Yes, she gets to go home at the end of the day. But, when our loved one passes, we go back to our lives, such as they are, but she soldiers on to the next person in need. I have hired paid caregivers in the past who were wonderful. And even though we could only afford having them for a few hours a week, those were precious hours that I could have to myself or use to do errands for Mom. I felt completely confident leaving Mom in their care.
Caregiving, paid or not, is an incredibly stressful and draining job. This is forum is the one place we can come to vent and speak our mind in complete openess. I hope we can keep the atmosphere here congenial for all our sakes.
Lilli

Aant.... I'm cracking up here about your "Redneck Life Alert." I think we'll go with your invention instead of mine...... you are the true inventor...... pretty ingenious for sure!! lol

In defense of Ruth, I have to say that I see Ruth on here quite a bit giving genuine support and positive advice and she always seems to be upbeat, seems to love her work and I can almost hear a song in her voice. When I read her statement "not on MY watch" I thought she was saying it tongue in cheek and because I feel like I have gotten to know her personality here a little bit, I could hear her laughing as she typed it. I don't think she meant it the way you read it.

Oh my gosh.... I thought I was the only one shopping at the Goodwill!!! lol

Saying a prayer for a quiet, relaxing evening for all...... God Bless!!