FIL has late stage dementia. He talks all day and half the night. Most of what he says doesn't make sense, or else is twisted. Like yesterday he was saying that he built our house. Which of course he didn't. But he was going on and on about it. I just kept nodding but it is driving me crazy. Any ideas on what to do? I haven't been turning on the tv lately because if he sees something there he goes on a fantasy trip about it for days afterwards. For instance, a dune buggy race became that he wanted to race the dogs, and he won $3 million and had a fit when I didn't go pick up his winnings in time.
Dr. hasn't been very helpful, but referred FIL to a neurologist. Not sure about that.
Any suggestions on how to help? He has not been eating partly because he won't stop talking. MIL is deaf and can't hear him, so just tunes him out.
Thanks for listening
Christine
If it's a lie that will harm someone or cause dissention in the family, like Manalake's MIL insisting that she paid for Manalake's house, then it should be explained to the BIL, in private, that MIL was mistaken. Accusations of physical harm have to be taken more seriously. I would never allow myself to be alone with my MIL for that reason. She's already told my husband that I threatened to have her arrested for failing to pay her income taxes (???) and I don't doubt for a second that she'd tell someone that I punched her. I never would, although I'd really like to. Just one good, solid punch in the nose to pay her back for thirty years of lies, insults, triangulation, arrogance, back-stabbing and sneakiness.
Does your FIL live with you? Then I understand it could be really hard to listen to him talking all of the time. It is easier when I spend a few hours a day with Dad to listen to stories I know are not true.
I would try to see what could be done to help him sleep part of the night as he needs his rest. However, the elderly without dementia don't sleep 8 hours a night in many cases. They often sleep 5 to 6 hours a night at most. Naps can help them too.
My dad loves to talk to anyone about the past. Mostly he is accurate. He does get mixed up about where we used to live, thinking we used to live where my brother used to live. Not an issue. I think it is part of reviewing the past to see what they accomplished, times when emotions were strong and sweet (hopefully).
2. Humour him.
3. Get plenty of sleep.
Good luck.
Just smile, be agreeable, and don't take anything he says seriously unless he is in distress.
You didn't cause it, it isn't his fault, so just play along. It will do no harm.
Be blessed.