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She had several accidents last year. Up until then, she was very independent and lived alone. I finally got her to move into an assisted living place which was beautiful and awesome, but by then she had another accident (before moving into her apartment) and once she was living there they basically kicked her out saying she needed more care than they could provide. She is now in a facility that has pretty much every level of care you can think of. She has been in their skilled nursing for rehab after one of her accidents, but after her most recent accident (falling down the basement stairs at home) she is now in long term care. At first she gave up and wanted to die. Now she is wanting to get better and live alone again. She doesn't need very much care at this point, probably could move into the assisted living part of the facility. Has that ever happened or can it happen? If she should improve enough to be considered a candidate for assisted living apartment (less expensive) in the same facility she is in long term care now, will they consider moving her? Has that happened to anyone here before? I was told that they reassess every 3 months, but really did not get a straight answer if they would be able to do that.

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It's your mother's decision, yes? She's not considered mentally incompetent?

In which case, if it keeps her in good spirits, let her enjoy planning her triumphant return when she is sufficiently strong. Could be it could happen, stranger things have happened, and what need is there to dash her hopes?

It sounds as if her quality of life and the quality of care is pretty good where she is now, is that so?
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Sure. You would need to talk to the facility's nursing director and ask for an assessment. that would determine the level of 'assistance' she needs. They would set up a new care plan for her, and her monthly costs would be adjusted based on the amount of assistance she requires.
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Yes, I have seen people improve enough to need a lessor level of care.

I would ask them for a new needs assessment and then have an independent one done, area on aging can help you with that. The facility benefits from her paying for a higher level of care that they don't have to provide.

If she doesn't need much help, push for a move, she can always move back to higher care if it doesn't work out.
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bundleofjoy Jan 2022
i agree :).

:) i think it’s fantastic she’s improved so much that she needs less care! at 94! amazing.

yes, encourage her, congratulate her! i hope OP, you can help your mother move (to assisted living/etc./what you think is right), while also making sure helping doesn’t cause trouble in your life.
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Alva is a wonderful poster and a woman with brains who I think would always want to know the truth about herself. Other posters get on better with therapeutic lies, for example ‘We are waiting on the doctor to give the facility the OK to discharge you. They can’t do what the government calls ‘an unsafe discharge', so we just have to wait for a while. Let’s talk about how you will set it up when it finally is OK’. Perhaps get another assessment, but don’t explain too well in case she ‘fails’ and it upsets her.

You know your mother, do what you think is in her best interests and will also make her happy.
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I think it is very unrealistic and almost magical thinking in a 94 year old, now settled in her new place, to think she may be going home again. For this reason I would be honest and say that it is no longer an option and no longer safe. It can definitely happen that she may be able to move into the ALF portion of her facility. I would speak with those in charge about this. Much depends upon mentation. There is a whole series of levels of care for such things as needing help with bathing and needing help with some incontinence, with mobility issues. What there is not, in most instances, is the ability to move into the ALF portion with mental deficits that may mean wandering, attempts to leave and etc.
I would be honest as you go along, and hold out hope she can move to her own room in assisted living. She may mourn. All of these losses are WORTH mourning and there is no way to make all of this a fix-it that is lovely all the way around. Sure do wish you both luck going forward.
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