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Every day several times a day she is hurting. One minute it’s her back then within a few it’s her finger or just anywhere!!! Then the next day she won’t hurt at all then the next day it’s her toe or under her arm!!!

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I am 81. Trust me. She IS hurting. As an old RN I can tell you the spinal compression alone for elders is "a thing" and nerves are affected which affects muscles, which affects bones, blah blah. Yes. She hurts.
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She may have aches and pains. I am 74 and get them just getting up from the couch. But, like children, I think they become dramatic about them or the feel more pain then they did when younger. You know, a child scrapes their knee and they are dying. An an adult scrapes their knee and says "oh s***". I would have her checked out but she may just need some Advil.
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Maybe mom is hurting.
I can tell you that there are days when my foot hurts, my knees hurt, my hip hurts and I can go on and on....
There are other days when they don't hurt as much or at all.
I have no one that will listen to my list of aches and pains...the dogs couldn't care less and the cat is a cat so if it does not involve him he does not care. their main focus is will we get fed today
So mom may be bending your ear because you are there an listening.
You mention mom is living at home and has dementia. Is mom living alone or with you?
If she is living in her home does she have caregivers with her? If so do they make any comments to you that she is complaining about aches and pains?
If mom is living in her home and does not have caregivers you might want to revisit that, I am of the belief that a person with dementia should not be living alone. If she is living with you do you notice any facial cues that she is in pain? A grimace, a flinch, even a quiet ouch at times? If not then I would not worry much. Sometimes complaining about aches and pains is just the way to get conversation.
But next time she is at the doctors you might want to bring it up.
Arthritis is pretty common and in most cases can be relieved with an anti-inflammatory
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She’s hurting. We all, or at least most all, get arthritis as we age and it hurts, plus a myriad of other issues that can crop up. And as the world becomes smaller and smaller for a senior, it’s natural to focus on the hurts more. Nobody enjoys the person who talks a lot about their pains, yet it’s so very common
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My MIL says her arm hurts and then she will show you how bad it hurts by raising her arm while going ow ow ow ow ow ow ow, so we told her to stop doing that if it hurts.

Everything hurts when you get older.
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Does your mom have arthritis, lupus, fibromyalgia, etc?

Just because someone has dementia it doesn’t preclude them from other disease.

While “anything” is possible, poor posture, bad diet, little exercise, all these things can cause pain.
A doc visit to discuss blood work, X-rays, physical therapy, etc. might be of help.

I would make her an appointment today.
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MargaretMcKen Oct 2023
I’m not sure that pain skips around quite like this.
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When you get old you get aches and pains. That is normal. Elderly people also like to complain. That is also normal. If they have dementia they also make things up or have exaggerated concerns.

My mom thinks that every spot or growth on her skin is cancer. After many visits to the dermatologist who is very nice and assures her it isn’t I stopped taking her. She still thinks she will be scheduled for surgery for her non-existent skin cancer.

Mom was convinced she needed knee surgery because her knee hurt so badly. She was calling orthopedic surgeons for appointments. A week later she was fine and on to the next thing. Recently it has been her eye hurts.

If she is in a lot of pain you should be able to tell. Otherwise, if the doctor is okay with it tell her to take an over the counter pain reliever. That helped my mom mostly as a placebo I think. She still thinks she need all these surgeries she will never get but it shuts her up and it probably does help with some of those regular aches and pains.
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