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I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
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V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
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I do not think she is getting proper care where she is at. They are doing nothing except let her sit all day. I do not want to make her life worse by moving her.
lovemom, how long has your Mom been at her current facility? Is the facility a Memory Care? Will the new place have Memory Care?
Just curious, do you visit Mom at the same time with each visit? You might want to visit at a different time. I remember one writer here on the forums had visited her Mom at a different time and found her Mom enjoying the activities and laughing with a group of other residents. Prior to that, her Mom would grumble how she hated the place, etc.
Inadequate care can be hard on a person with dementia.
What kind of facility it is? How long has she been there.
No care center can force people to participate in activities. The important question in judging a facility is do they encourage participation? Do they invite and remind and suggest? My mother was wheelchair bound in a NH. A couple times a day a staff person would poke their head in Mom's room, or locate her in a community room and remind her it was time for the accordion show, or the jewelry making activity or the gardening hour, etc. To our amazement she almost always let them wheel her to the location! Her roommate, on the other hand, got the same reminder service but she almost never participated in anything. If your mother is saying "no" to leaving her room where she is, how can you be sure she will say "yes" in a new place?
Are there other ways in which you feel the care isn't proper?
I never visit the same day or times. The unit is short staffed, but the ones that are there do not give the clients any variety or things to do. They are always chit-chatting with each other. The activity lady does not even give the option of doing anything but sit. When we first put her there the activity girl was really good with them but she is no longer there. The unit is very outdated and not very clean. They do not check on the clients unless they do not come to dining area to eat. I stay 2 hours or more at least 1 time a week at different times and days. I have toured the facility I am thinking of moving to and it appears they have lots of help and lots of activity to keep their minds active.
There was a very interesting show on PBS just last night called Living With Alzheimer’s and Dementia. It shared the story of a woman with dementia who was in a facility that did not give her opportunity for socializing. So the family scoped out other places and once they moved her to one that did she became a different and happier person. So yes it can be helpful depending on on what stage your mom is in and how aware she is of her surroundings. And yes, change is always hard on dementia cases but if she may have many more years to live it might be worthwhile. It is hard to see them just languish in their chair. I have the activity director mail me the monthly calendar so I can see what is planned. You might go when an activity is happening and see what is going on and take your mom. See how she does.
I did move my mom from a memory care to a regular nursing home, and it has worked out very well. She adjusted quickly and seems happier. The staff seem happier here, food better, place is cleaner and brighter with the added bonus of being less expensive. I'm there daily, and there are many activities they take her to, even though she's pretty much out of it at this point. No place you find will be perfect, but it was a relief to find this smaller nonprofit nursing home for my mom.
I just moved my mom from an assisted living facility to an adult foster care home (5 to 2 ratio of care) for the same cost. My mother was treated the same way, but left for hours alone, lost a huge amount of weight (I live out of country) and became very sickly. I thought it would be horrible to move her as she insisted everything was ok. It was the best decision I have ever made. She is thriving, engaging with others, and smiling again. She is healthy now and in a safe environment. It took about a week to adjust. I wish the best for you.
Here's a way to make the move smoother. If you can, work with a senior move manager. Arrange for them to move Mom while she is out of the building - you take her out somewhere (if you can) or arrange that using a non-emergent handicap transport (if needed), etc. While she's away, have the move managers move her stuff and arrange it as much like the previous location as possible. Then, "return home" at the new place. Of course, you'll have to use your judgment whether this could work.
Trust your instincts that she's not getting proper care and move her as soon as possible. We placed my dad in afacility (after hiring a geriatric care manager to help us find that place--complete waste of money) and it turned out to be an understaffed hellhole. We were the only family members that made daily visits to my dad's floor and the staff was not happy to have these new outsiders observing what was going on (e.g., CNAs shouting at patients, parking patients in wheelchairs facing the wall if when they "acted up," patients waiting hours to be fed). I found the new place by calling admissions counselors at 5 places in our area and basically having a conversation with them. The best info I got was from two counselors whose facilities were at capacity. I asked them, "Since you have no room for my dad at your facility, can you give me the names of 2 other facilities where you would place your OWN dad if you had to?" Both people named the place that we ended up transferring him.
I would move her. My Mom could no longer carry a conversation. Her brain was jumping all around. She sat in a real nice Gerri chair all day long. I requested she not be left in her room. She didn't like to be alone. The chair was padded with side pieces next to each side of her head. When she went to sleep, her head rested on the side pieces and the back reclined. This way she was kept in the common room most of the time. Even though she couldn't participate in all activities, they got her involved in the ones she could. There were activities every day and a movie before dinner. The residents were allowed to walk around or scoot if in wheelchairs thru the whole facility. Mom had two former AL residents there and they looked and acted better than at the AL.
I'm just going though this with my mother. I won't kid you it has been very difficult. She is having a really hard time making the adjustment. Plus the headaches for me getting everything set up and the move. I suspected she wasn't getting all the care she needed at the old ALZ and was absolutely appalled when we got into the moving process to see how actually filthy her environment was. The dirt was an inch deep under her bed and dresser also found "sheds" from old bedbug infestation. I knew they had treated the facility but was given the impression they were not found on her wing. If you even have the slightest inkling that her care is substandard please consider the move. Also look long and hard at the new place to make sure they are going to provide her the care she needs. With my Mom's new placement if it is found she needs more care like memory care she doesn't need to go to another facility and can stay right there.
I moved my mom and she adjusted because she knew the help she needed was not provoded. She was wheeel chair bound & was unable to take herself to the restroom. They were so short on staff that the aids limited how often she could go to the bathroom. The problem was each ALF I visited all said the same thing that she could go to the bathroom if she paid extra,so we did. And she was not taken because the next response was always we are too short on aids. Honestly it took me awhile but I discovered the intake nurse & director are more in sales then healthcare. I was told ALL the right information yet it did not happen. This is what was more discouraging for my mom then the moving. Eventually I learned to look at how many of the wheeel chair bound people had outside hired help for their needs. Then I knew that paying for the ALF's extra help was still inadequate since private aids were a necessity. Im glad I moved my mom because she also needed to accept that what we are told and what happens is very different. I realised the ALF was housing for her but I needed to visit her often to stay on top of her care. The money goes to the investors as a buisness & the aids are so under paid & exhausted that caring for everything placed on them is too much. The turn over is great because of the low salaries they receive. I began the journey trusting and believeing what I would be told,now I realise it is buisness. Yes their were exceptions as some aids were angels. However it made it difficult for my mom to tolerate the angry aids once she was treated well. I feel good that I relocated her until I understood more how the system works. I tried to have my mom at home several times but the private services often were late or they cancellationed which effected my being able to leave for my work.
yes, lovemom1932, I think you're right that it would be best to move her. I hope that you are able to check out new places pretty thoroughly -- I know how difficult that is. I hope that you find better options. Praying for higher quality of life for your mom!
I am moving my mom tomorrow to the other facility called Agustes Cottage. Praying I made the right decision. In the facility she was in the men and women were in same wing and my mom mentioned several time that a man was in her room. This really bothered me. Did not know what was going on. I am just concerned about her adjustment to the different facility.
Most people with ALZ do that all day, its no fault of the facility. I have seen people with ALZ in nursing home, when the aide would try to move them around, they would not move and when they tried to move them, the position they sit in are hard to move them out of it..so why force something that cant be done..The facility just try to make them as comfortable as they possibility can...Also you might want to do a drop by, dont always go to the facility the same time, pick different time to drop by, this way you will see what type of treatment you parent is getting...I had one to treat my mom bad ONEEE time, when I got finished with the DIRECTOR i had no more problems.
But really facility change really make a differences, if she has ALZ... most time again, our parent dont know or remember whats going on...:)
Moved my mother to another facility and I am very pleased with how she is doing. She is now involved with daily activities and seems to be enjoying them. I feel it is very important for Alz patience to not just sit and stare at surroundings. Also the new facility is spotless clean compared to the one she was in. Thank you all for your feedback.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
Just curious, do you visit Mom at the same time with each visit? You might want to visit at a different time. I remember one writer here on the forums had visited her Mom at a different time and found her Mom enjoying the activities and laughing with a group of other residents. Prior to that, her Mom would grumble how she hated the place, etc.
Inadequate care can be hard on a person with dementia.
What kind of facility it is? How long has she been there.
No care center can force people to participate in activities. The important question in judging a facility is do they encourage participation? Do they invite and remind and suggest? My mother was wheelchair bound in a NH. A couple times a day a staff person would poke their head in Mom's room, or locate her in a community room and remind her it was time for the accordion show, or the jewelry making activity or the gardening hour, etc. To our amazement she almost always let them wheel her to the location! Her roommate, on the other hand, got the same reminder service but she almost never participated in anything. If your mother is saying "no" to leaving her room where she is, how can you be sure she will say "yes" in a new place?
Are there other ways in which you feel the care isn't proper?
But really facility change really make a differences, if she has ALZ... most time again, our parent dont know or remember whats going on...:)