Are you sure you want to exit? Your progress will be lost.
Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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I acknowledge and authorize
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I consent to the collection of my consumer health data.*
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I consent to the sharing of my consumer health data with qualified home care agencies.*
*If I am consenting on behalf of someone else, I have the proper authorization to do so. By clicking Get My Results, you agree to our Privacy Policy. You also consent to receive calls and texts, which may be autodialed, from us and our customer communities. Your consent is not a condition to using our service. Please visit our Terms of Use. for information about our privacy practices.
Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
Share a few details and we will match you to trusted home care in your area:
“why does it seem she likes drama, trouble, or getting people mad at each other?”
i know someone exactly like that.
why are they like this?
they want you to be in a constant state of stress.
—— be careful. reduce contact. live a full life.
hire caregivers?
negativity will destroy you:
totally unnecessarily exhausted/unhappy.
i say unnecessarily, because there are many elderly people who intentionally and consciously do this (in particular against their female family relative who is caring/helping them).
You and your kids moved in with her? Think about what a huge adjustment that is for her. What sort of care does she need? To back to your life. This sort of arrangement is very hard on your kids.
You are 50, your husband is living there too? Mom is kid 70's maybe? Did she ask you and family to move in with her? Whose crazy idea was this?
Your profile says you're 50, so how old is your mom? Is this behavior a "normal" part of her personality before? If not, it could be the beginnings of cognitive decline. I would strongly recommend rethinking living with her. The longer you stay there, the more you are "stuck" in that situation financially and otherwise.
If you moved in to provide assistance to her, did she assign you as her durable PoA? If not and she won't do this, it is yet another reason to find an alternative living and care situation. This is a deal-breaker IMO. If you think there's drama now, just wait until she worsens and you have no legal power to get her the care she needs but will likely refuse. And you being in her house really adds to the legal complexity since you won't be able to remove her from her own home into a care facility (if it comes to that in the future). If she were in your home, it'd be different and somewhat "easier".
If you have a spouse and kids, they are your first priority and shouldn't be subjected to this daily stress. You meant well but have come upon a hard realization, like so many others on this forum. Please read some of their posts and reconsider this arrangement.
I am so sorry you are dealing with this. I know how hard this decision was on you and your family. Luckily I have had a HUGE support system outside of my blood family that have talked me down from the decision you made. At first it sounds like the perfect right thing to do. My dad isn't in decline because of a condition out of his control, but due to alcohol. He has wet brain which is alcohol induced dementia. One of the most manipulative people you would ever meet. Never used to be that way. We were able to get court ordered temporary guardianship. It has been an emotional rollercoaster over the last 4 years. We were finally able to get him into an assisted living facility and as hard as that is on my dad, it is for his own safety and health. It hurts being 1300 miles away from him and we would love to have him closer to us, but we have been down that road once and it was a LIVING HELL.
I pray you find peace and guidance in the decisions to come. It may sound cold hearted but if we don't take care of ourselves, how can we take care of others? God speed.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
i know someone exactly like that.
why are they like this?
they want you to be in a constant state of stress.
——
be careful.
reduce contact.
live a full life.
hire caregivers?
negativity will destroy you:
totally unnecessarily exhausted/unhappy.
i say unnecessarily, because there are many elderly people who intentionally and consciously do this (in particular against their female family relative who is caring/helping them).
soon-new-year hug!!! :)
You are 50, your husband is living there too? Mom is kid 70's maybe?
Did she ask you and family to move in with her? Whose crazy idea was this?
If you moved in to provide assistance to her, did she assign you as her durable PoA? If not and she won't do this, it is yet another reason to find an alternative living and care situation. This is a deal-breaker IMO. If you think there's drama now, just wait until she worsens and you have no legal power to get her the care she needs but will likely refuse. And you being in her house really adds to the legal complexity since you won't be able to remove her from her own home into a care facility (if it comes to that in the future). If she were in your home, it'd be different and somewhat "easier".
If you have a spouse and kids, they are your first priority and shouldn't be subjected to this daily stress. You meant well but have come upon a hard realization, like so many others on this forum. Please read some of their posts and reconsider this arrangement.
I pray you find peace and guidance in the decisions to come. It may sound cold hearted but if we don't take care of ourselves, how can we take care of others?
God speed.