My mom needed 24/7 care after surgery.the asked me to live with them permanently and my sister spent 9 weeks helping too! My brother, who lives around the corner from my parents demanded we text him daily and would not help us with anything. He would drop by occasionally as he always did but that was the extent of his involvement.he told me that I had ulterior motives.. that I wanted their house! He said I made demands for money on my dad.in another “Conversation” in front of my sister he said I should never take money from them because he knows they helped me with my houseTHEN at the hospital he took my dad in the hallway and warned him about me— I came into the hall and my brother said I had already taken the “first step” in scamming them by “pushing family members out” he warned my dad to “watch his bank account “ because I will access it and take his money. My brother said he wants a legal document that states I can never access any of their money! My parents told me if he continues on with this he is cut out of everything.i told my parents I will be civil with him when it comes to their health care ( doctors appointments etc) But I will not spend time with him- so when he does drop in I make myself scarce he now comes into my parents house unannounced and startles us! It’s like he’s spying! After my sister’s 9 week stay she sent an email saying he is wrong about me and how difficult it really is to be a full time caregiver.I want to enjoy this time with my parents.i am scared that if something happens to them ( like a fall) he will file a lawsuit against me. How can I get peace with this situation?
my brother is the executor
You should be paid legally and that means a contract. Otherwise, if they ever require medicaid the 5 year lookback will look as though they are gifting you and they will not qualify for care.
You do not share the details of a POA. You are NOT free to discuss their finances with brother or anyone else.
Do understand, if they ever need governmental assistance there will be clawback reimbursement to Medicaid after their deaths on that home.
You could actually end up homeless and without a good job history unless you get and KEEP a job working from home.
If brother wishes to he may apply to be their guardianship, but since you are living with them and caring for them and if you get a POA from your parents, he likely would not win a guardianship fight in court.
Siblings fighting over parents while they bodies are still warm is one of my pet peeves. It is very hard on parents.
I wish you the best.
I was blessed with a full time job after months of searching and was able to move.
Siblings get wicked when they get greedy for money. It's jealousy especially when they think another sibling is getting a bigger slice of the pie. So, please watch your back and continue to work if you haven't quit your job. You may want to start looking for a job if you are not currently working. You are going to need your quarters to qualify for Medicare once you hit sixty-five.
You do not mention who is POA.
If your parents are cognizant then the Executer can be changed if they so wish.
If you are not POA and your brother is this could get messy and if that is the case walk away. Let him handle this.
And if you do that I would think you will get nothing as far as an inheritance.
You should also be getting paid for your "caregiving services" and "room and board" is NOT compensation for caregiving.