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Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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I acknowledge and authorize
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I consent to the collection of my consumer health data.*
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I consent to the sharing of my consumer health data with qualified home care agencies.*
*If I am consenting on behalf of someone else, I have the proper authorization to do so. By clicking Get My Results, you agree to our Privacy Policy. You also consent to receive calls and texts, which may be autodialed, from us and our customer communities. Your consent is not a condition to using our service. Please visit our Terms of Use. for information about our privacy practices.
Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
Share a few details and we will match you to trusted home care in your area:
Welcome, Juliet. I just wanted to respond quickly so you know there are people listening. Would you like to say more about what your situation is, and what's made you reach out today?
Maybe its time for a Nursing Home. You can apply for Medicaid if she has no money. It does become where we just can't do it anymore. I did not bring my Mom into my home thinking it would be forever. I was hoping her house would sell quickly and I could place her in a nice AL. After a year the house did not sell. So, I tried Daycare which helped.(they bathed her for me) But Mom continued to decline each month and with the decline more problems. We planned to go to nieces wedding 8 hours away. I went to the local AL about respite for Mom. Found they were having a 1/2 price sale on rooms so went ahead and placed her having enough of her money for a year. That first night was the first night I was able to sleep all night. No worries about her coming up the steps. Her not having to spend most of her time in her bedroom/sitting room watching TV. Me not feeling guilty about it. She now had an AL that was one story so she could walk the halls always coming back to the common area. She had people to talk to, entertainment and activities. After her money ran out, I placed her in a NH with Medicaid paying. By that time she had declined a lot and was in her last stage if Dementia.
This is the cruel logic of serious illness and exactly how it plays out. You have illustrated the stages of care precisely and more people should be aware of this. In general, our homes, our lives, our expertise is not in professional, medical, caregiving. Yet, we think we should be able to "do it all". By what metric does that make sense or truely succeed in the real world of caregiving? Sure, in the begining, it may not be "that bad", but....as too many here know.....reality hits and decisions are made. That's ok, life happens and we're here to vent about it. Sharing the load helps lighten the trail we're on.
Juliet1061 If you feel this way you must get some help for your sake as well as your mothers. Each county in the US has a area agency on aging. Do a search for area agency on aging, your county, your state. Contact them for any assistance in your area for services available to you or mom. Ask for an assessment. Ask for respite. contact her insurance to see if home health is available. Make a call or follow leads daily to find resources. After six years I know it is hard to change course but you must. Many caregivers pass before their patients. What will happen to her if you become incapacitated or worse? Please don’t neglect yourself. Let us know how you are doing. We care.
Is there anyone else that can care for mom? Are you legally responsible for her care? Are you POA? or her Guardian? Can mom afford Memory Care? If so begin the process of finding a place for her. Would mom qualify for any services? Contact your local Agency on Aging and they can help determine if she does qualify for services that could range from some caregiver services on a limited basis or more hours. They would also have a Social Worker that might be able to point you in the direction of more services. Is mom a Veteran? if so the VA might be of help. If dad was a Veteran and is still alive she may qualify because of his service. Does mom have any other health concerns? She may qualify for Hospice and if so you would have a Nurse that would come see her 1 time a week, a CNA that would come several times a week. You would also have the services of a Social Worker as well as being able to request a Volunteer that could come and spend time with mom while you get out, or a volunteer could come and help with light housework. If at anytime she has to be brought to the hospital talk to a Social Worker there. Tell them that you can no longer care for her and she can not be discharged to you as it is not a safe discharge. You may have to relinquish control and she would be made a Ward of the State. This would involve a court process and a Court appointed Guardian would then manage her care.
It would help us to have some more information about what is going on. Why are you depressed? Why can you not stand your Mother? Solely taking care of her for six years is very hard. End of your rope means what to you? Assisted living, memory care for your Mother? Walking away? It is ok to add the details of your discontent. It helps us to reach out and find a commonality to help others here, this is what this site is for, please explain more about your situation. Caregiving is incredibly hard, and most of us here know that.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
In general, our homes, our lives, our expertise is not in professional, medical, caregiving. Yet, we think we should be able to "do it all". By what metric does that make sense or truely succeed in the real world of caregiving? Sure, in the begining, it may not be "that bad", but....as too many here know.....reality hits and decisions are made. That's ok, life happens and we're here to vent about it. Sharing the load helps lighten the trail we're on.
If you feel this way you must get some help for your sake as well as your mothers.
Each county in the US has a area agency on aging.
Do a search for area agency on aging, your county, your state. Contact them for any assistance in your area for services available to you or mom. Ask for an assessment. Ask for respite. contact her insurance to see if home health is available. Make a call or follow leads daily to find resources.
After six years I know it is hard to change course but you must. Many caregivers pass before their patients. What will happen to her if you become incapacitated or worse?
Please don’t neglect yourself.
Let us know how you are doing. We care.
Are you legally responsible for her care? Are you POA? or her Guardian?
Can mom afford Memory Care? If so begin the process of finding a place for her.
Would mom qualify for any services?
Contact your local Agency on Aging and they can help determine if she does qualify for services that could range from some caregiver services on a limited basis or more hours. They would also have a Social Worker that might be able to point you in the direction of more services.
Is mom a Veteran? if so the VA might be of help. If dad was a Veteran and is still alive she may qualify because of his service.
Does mom have any other health concerns? She may qualify for Hospice and if so you would have a Nurse that would come see her 1 time a week, a CNA that would come several times a week. You would also have the services of a Social Worker as well as being able to request a Volunteer that could come and spend time with mom while you get out, or a volunteer could come and help with light housework.
If at anytime she has to be brought to the hospital talk to a Social Worker there. Tell them that you can no longer care for her and she can not be discharged to you as it is not a safe discharge.
You may have to relinquish control and she would be made a Ward of the State.
This would involve a court process and a Court appointed Guardian would then manage her care.