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My husband is 80 , he has Sundowners Dementia , this past February he had a Stroke which added to some confusion for him.


He has a Pacemaker / Defib and a Mechanical Aorta Valve of which he takes Coumadin to prevent clots in his Valve.


He was in a Rehab after the Stroke for his legs to improve in strength and to walk again. He wasn't improving so we got released , we went home and he is now in a Hospital Bed. Hospice is now his help. Since his Primary Doctor is no longer taking care of him, Hospice has their own Doctors and therefore no one is doing Protime checks to know how thick or thin his blood is, I have continued to give him the same exact meds he has taken for years.


Yesterday his Hospice Nurse said the Doctor said to stop his Coumadin because if he fell he could possibly bleed out. He is bedfast and doesn't get up so the chance of him falling is highly unlikely.


I have read where if Coumadin is stopped that is possible with the blood thickening a clot could pass and he could have another stroke that would cause alot of suffering as his life is wasting away.


I'm torn to keep giving his Coumadin or not along with his other meds.


It almost feels like the Doctor wants to try and hasten his death.


We've been married 38 years and I'm having a hard time accepting how I'm going to have to let go .


Have anyone of you ever went through making this decision and your thoughts Please


Thank Y'all So Much

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I am so sorry to hear of all you are going through but you certainly sound like the image of Florence Nightingale.

My husband was on Coumadin for many years. He was recently changed to Xrelata. I think it is spelled that way but it sounds like that. One advantage is not having to be tested at a lab frequently. I believe it is s newer drug in the same category as Coumadin. I think you should ask the doctor about possibly making the switch
I can only hope you have some less stressful days ahead
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HOSPICE....
Question: for you and your husband to answer... These are hard... I am sorry for what you both are going through.. It's not fun.. Been there.. :(

Does your husband understand what is going on?
Strokes are not good. And he has been through more than you know and I know.
I have relatives who have gone through strokes, pacemaker (christmas present), seizures, esophgeal cancer, liver cancer, prostate cancer, cervical cancer, breast cancer, ALZ, early onset ALZ.... and dementia. and lung cancer.... list goes on the older I get.... life.....



When my mom past, one of our good friends said to me: Mom was tired, she didn't want to do this anymore. My FIL said the same thing to my MIL.. He will miss her, but his body isn't the same. He said our bodies are not meant to keep going on... Our spirit is... It was so hard... Everyone of these people I know, I loved dearly... and it doesn't ever get easier...

Gather your loved ones, and your husband, and have a quiet moment, talk with your pastor, or whomever, get the answers YOU & hubby need. Know you two love eachother, and you will be there for eachother. And if you want to keep him on blood thinners and keep him a few more days or years, then, do it. I don't know if hospice will help you, but tell Dr. Hospice that you are not ready to give up. Tell Dr. Hospice that you and hubby want to keep going...

When FIL had pacemaker, after a few years, the battery was dying.. literally... He told us the medical industry didn't want to pay for another pacemaker and the industry was ready to let him die... Well, they waited until the last minute, then got him in to change out the battery (pacemaker) ... WOW.... It was touch n go for a bit. That thing helped pump the blood etc... When the battery runs low... It gets kinda scary..... Never thought of it till that happened....He past away from cancer nothing to do with the pacemaker.... Who knows... It's just hard to see someone you love... go away....
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With one of my dear relatives... i had to make the decisions..It was not fun.. My hsopice team was off the weekend I needed them THE MOST. ALL OF THEM WERE OFF DUTY.....

The on-duty gal told and showed me how to crush morphine pills and paste them in the mouth.... Do this every hour....When I call the 800 number (my angel-yes, he helped me later that night early morning) he told me he would come by around 7 am... I was basically by myself...

If yo find yourself in this situation: HOSPICE SHOULD HAVE GIVEN YOU A CARE PACKET THAT SITS INSIDE YOUR REFRIGERATOR.... MORPHINE AND ATIVAN high dosage pills.... mine did, but forget to relay that to me.. Then I find out later that some hospices have IV drips.... so this may not pertain to you.
GET YOUR FACTS... FIND OUT IF YOU HAVE A CARE PACKET INSIDE YOUR REFRIGERATOR....

TAPE THESE COPIES ON THE WALL ABOVE PATIENT !!!!

Get all the numbers of HOSPICE, AND TAPE THEM ON THE WALL ...

POLST ORDER: If you HAVE ONE TAPE IT ON THE WALL.

DNR; TAPE IT ON THE WALL.
CONTACT NUMBERS: FRIENDS, FAMILY. DOCTORS, ANYONE YOU NEED TO TALK TO: TAPE IT ON THE WALL... MAKE IT CLEAR SO NOBODY HAS TO GO THROUGH FILES TO FIND IT.... TAPE COPIES ON THE WALL.... !!

IF YOU THINK PATIENT HAS AN ISSUE WITH IT... ASK THEM.. PUT A FRAME ON IT, BUT MAKE IT CLEAR.... TAPE IT ON WALL!!!!

Sorry, my end of life ordeal with my loved one was not peaceful, fun, it never really is... unless they go in your sleep.
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