She cannot live alone or bathe or cook any longer, and she is happy in her new home. But I don’t want to hurt her by not moving her out or by not taking her out daily as she seems to expect when covid restrictions are over. I’m a little fearful of too much fall-hazard activity. She wants to go shopping.
Bear in mind some days she’s much more lucid than others, but advice is needed on how to explain she’s not really capable of what she dreams of.
What I'll bet is really going on is that she's bored. She's looking for something different to do, because like the rest of us, she's been locked down for a year. Everyone is stir-crazy.
Once she's able to be taken out (if she's able to do even that), a drive and a fast-food run may well be enough. Just you being able to come visit her in her place may be enough. Bring her a piece of pie, or in my mom's case, I would bring her a chile relleno and we'd eat Mexican food together out in the courtyard at her place. (Nursing homes don't serve Mexican food -- who knew? :-) )
Just try to find a way to mix things up for her to make some days a little different than the others. If she isn't physically able to "go shopping," find other things in her scope of ability that can be done.
Just put limits on the outings such as only to a park, a walk, a Sonic for ice cream or to have her hair done. Wear 2 face masks and gloves. Use hand sanitizer upon entry and existing any stores. Really, it's gonna be okay honey. Have a wonderful time with your mother while you can. I would give anything in this world for just one more minute with my mother! 🙄
They are taken to a drive through for a lunch treat or a frosty or some kind.
You say she is looking forward to restrictions being over so that she can go out, go shopping, see people and all that amazing crazy stuff that we all of us remember so fondly. But although you've both been vaccinated, she's not complaining about still staying safe yet, is she? - so wait until she asks particular questions, and then give her truthful answers.
And perhaps one truth is that this is less to do with Covid and more to do with your fear of her falling? Get some training! And a lightweight, folding wheelchair that you can keep in your car.
Just keep kicking it down the road.
See All Answers