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My mom had surgery and suffered a stroke, I know there are benefits for surviving spouse of someone who was in active duty of the military. Please help

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There is an Aid and Attendence that can be applied for. For a Vet spouse the maxium is about 1200 towards their care, It can help with homecare or towards private pay in an AL. If on Medicaid for ur care, you can't receive it. To receive it the spouse has to have been in the service during wartime. Call your local VA office and talk to the person there about filing.
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Sorry your question fell down the rabbit hole - I know nothing about veteran's benefits but it seems to me you need to contact the VA to get the ball rolling, AgingCare has numerous posts and articles that may be useful:
https://www.agingcare.com/topics/193/veterans-pension
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They don't pay for VA spouses, and only pay at nursing homes for disabled veterans...My dad wasn't disabled and we paid $10,000 a month at the VA nursing home. No home care... we checked it all out.
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JoAnn29 Oct 2018
My mom was offered to apply for a place at a VA home as the spouse of a Vet who served during wartime. This was done by the VA rep who handled her A&A application so he was aware she had no money. I declined because the home was 45 min away and Mom was in an AL just up the road at the time.
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