Mom is now drinking on average 6 Boost drinks a day instead of eating food. Need suggestions and advice.
Late last year, I told my Mom’s (82) Doctor that she still isn’t eating enough and losing more weight. She doesn’t do much but sit in her chair all day and watch TV and sleep. He suggested that she drinks Boost drinks. Much to my relief, she loves Boost and I was excited to find cases of 24 bottles at Sam’s club for $20 (sale price), but they’re back up to $25. I thought this was a great idea to supplement breakfast and lunch, but she’s going through a case in 4 days. Initially, a case would last a little over a week. As of today, a case of 24 only lasts 4 days, which means she drinks on average 6 bottles a day. While I’m excited this is working for her, she still isn’t gaining weight, but she doesn’t seem as weak or frail. The bigger issue for me is that this is an expensive solution and she is not eating prepared meals, except for when I bring them. She eats very little and leaves the leftovers to go to waste. She is essentially on a liquid diet. I have no idea how to get her to eat more food. I tried to cut back on the frequency of the Boost cases, but she’s going through them even faster now. Need suggestions as to how to figure out the best and most economic solution. Because of my persistence, she is now offering money. I told her I can’t afford to buy $25 cases every 4 days and don’t think she should spend money drinking that much Boost. Need suggestions and advice. Thank you!
60 Answers
Popular Questions
Related Questions
- Any ideas on soft foods for elderly mom to eat besides the usual mashed potatoes, applesauce, ice cream?
- Mom wants me to eat the same thing she wants. If I say no, she throws a tantrum. Can you relate?
- My mother is in hospice care at home. Dad can not cook and they are mostly living on fast food. Any suggestions for meal delivery?
- Any ideas what to do when LO demands you prepare a 5 star breakfast every morning?
If she is getting less frail and week I would be encouraging her to have 7 or 8 a day.
Sooo frustrating! The reason she lives this way as she lacks the cognition, attention & concentration to plan or cook proper meals.
Firstly, who buys the Boost? How often are you visiting? Could you deliver 7 for the week? Or of you live together, keep only 7 available (the rest hid).
Secondly, why are you paying? Doesn't your Mother pay for her own groceries?
Thirdly, she may have lost her hunger due to always being full (of Boost). Similar to how toddlers who fill up on milk don't eat enough solids.
Lastly, you can change what's in YOUR control: limit her access to more than 1 per day, arrange meals on wheels or other meal service a few times a week instead.
If she can phone order & pay & arrange delivery herself (like my sister) then you don't have much control except advising her & also her Doctor.
One last thing, does she KNOW she is having 6 a day? Is there short term memory problems at all?
You might want to check that out, and see if she can get the Boosts that way, and w/o meals if she doesn't want them.
Then we discovered his blood sugar went way up. My husband is very good about gettng blood tests every month. Mainly because of Multiple Myoloma predisposition. But . .we both decided along with his GP . .to cut down on the sugars.
Now . . I'm into cooking . . fresh food dishes. For his health and I can work on my culinary skills!
Ensure . .Boost . . it's a good temporary patch if needed at certain times. But certainly not for long term food/nutrition consumption. All I'm saying is . .while she loves drinking the stuff . .her blood sugar is probably going through the roof. Not good.
Thats my take.
Protein powders with fresh fruit, in a blender may be cheaper. One powder I found and Sprouts.. called Bio-Chem protein powder. I think that was the name. Anyway, High protein powder you can throw fruit, milk or soymilk, ice, blend it. Save it for the whole day.
Instant Pot, buy chicken boneless skinless, add a couple bouillon cubes for salt and flavor. That lasts almost a week, with 3 pets, and me. Feeds all of us. Cheaper than catfood. Although your mom is not a cat, just saying, she can sip on the broth for a dinner, or lunch. I usually grab a cup microwave it for breakfast while getting ready for work. Then she can make chicken salad sandwich with the meat.. It's easy.. Although, I forgot to put back in frig this morning.. So I had to go buy another package of chicken. I think I will try a different protein. I am getting tired of chicken..
https://www.agingcare.com/articles/pro-tips-sneaking-calories-nutrients-into-a-seniors-diet-208396.htm
I went to the Dollare General and found a big container of chocolate protein mix. She drinks this very well with milk. Much cheaper. It is 11 dollars here and the protein content is 53 grams. So at breakfat mom will eat orwo cookies and a mixed drink and at night I will give her a big glass if her intake has been minimal for the day. I try not to give her one in the afternoon because someone nailed it when they said she won't eat if she gets full from drinking. So I have learned:
Mom loves cottage cheese with peaches or pears in thick syrup. I do not care about the sugar content only because when mom was able to care for herself she said, "At this age I will eat whatever the hell I want...". I passed this on to her doctor and there is no problem, especially since she lost all of her weight.
Peanutbutter and jelly sandwiches are appealing to mom at times. If I can get a half of sandwich in her then I look at this as a success. I cut the sandwich into quarters which makes it easier to handle.
One other thing I learned through research is that sometimes individuals who are elderly will refuse to eat if eating is cumbersome. They don't want to cut meat, juggle a spoonful of soup or chase peas around a plate. I have placed soup in a cup and at times mom has enjoyed this. As a rule, mom does not eat meat now. I discovered, by chance, that she will eat it at times. We were out for a ride and I bought her a hamburger from McDonald's or Burger King lol and she ate fries too. She will eat these things at home too but that adds up quickly financially wise.
I hope this helps. One thing I have learned from others is that whatever you can get in them helps. Liquid diets and not eating causes liquid bowel and so I make sure mom gets something in her, even if it is cookies and icecream along with the protein drinks.
Trouble chewing and/or swallowing could account for her preference for Boost, might she be having difficulty eating regular foods? Here are a couple of AgingCare articles about this:
https://www.agingcare.com/articles/reasons-why-your-aging-parent-may-not-be-eating-properly-and-what-you-can-do-about-it-133239.htm
https://www.agingcare.com/articles/dysphagia-how-to-help-a-loved-one-eat-and-drink-safely-187010.htm
If she has a source of income and you are really concerned about how much she’s costing you, go ahead and charge her.
If your concern is her blood sugar, have her blood levels tested.
If she “leaves leftovers” she doesn’t want to finish them and doesn’t care whether she’s wasting food or not.
Food preferences are very individual specific. What one person considers expensive and unwholesome may be nourishing and reasonably priced for its relative benefit.
The ultimate decision might best be made by her doctor’s input.
If DOCTOR is happy and EATER is happy, is there really any justification for objecting?
My mother periodically suffered from both severe agoraphobia and severe anorexia. In your situation I’d be happy to honor her choices.
up what we brought her. If I made grilled cheese while there, she would eat it but she would not think to microwave food we had labeled. Then she started nuking leftover coffee until it exploded all over the place. She refused to move, said she was not interested but thought it was fine to have my sister come twice a day to make her food, do her laundry and clean her house (my sister lived closer, but is single mom, 3 kids with full time job. We told her that is not going to happen and you have to move. Doctor said you cannot live along. She did move. So hopefully you can stop placating your mother, find a place she can afford and move her.
ONe of my caretakers for my LO's say, when they get older, and are slowing down, their bodies don't need the food. They don't want to eat anymore. he said, look at your pets, when they are ready, they will stop eating.. "That is nature." So, on that note, get the swallow test done if you can. And perhaps, she just wants protein shakes. So... LET THEM EAT CAKE.. WHATEVER THEY WANT.. Carnation is not so advertised as much, but sure they are just as good as the other protein drinks,... That's what they started out in our generation... Carnation..! Compare the protein and vitamins with boost, ensure, and other mixes out there. Is there that much of a difference in quality of product? then price, etc...taste. texture. contents... I kinda think not much difference. so try something else and see what happens. Or, mix it up .
My inlaws were not health experts or anything like that. He had an issue, and I got them the bio-chem protein.. It helped him. My MIL was mad at me. She had to make that for him everyday :) They both liked it. with added fruit etc... So, experiment and try different mixes, shakes, powders, blended peanut butter n jelly parfaits. You will find something that you both like. Make it fun.
From my view, I see a loving daughter trying to keep her Mum happy, healthy & keep Mum's independance too but doing more & more. Hinting at getting more care/changing things but not wanting to upset.
I have been caught in this quicksand & suppose I had to, to learn the way out. What helped me was good old fashioned plain talking.
Some hard questions coming...
Is Boost the problem or just the tip of an iceberg?
If you zoomed out, way back - what's the whole iceberg (situation) look like? An elderly lady, living alone, not able to shop for herself, eat or drink properly, manage bills(?) or socialise.
If you broke your leg, could Mum look after herself? Could she arrange deliveries, collect medications, use taxis, get to appointments?
Is she really 'independant'?
My sister had a visit from Dept of Health. She told them "I live alone independantly".
After assessing her situation, the Rep said "You live alone *dependantly*. You are very dependant on your family. You cannot look after yourself. You need to move into supported accomodation". Not gentle or tactful - just plain talking.
Like a giagantic bandaid was just ripped off & we saw the wound for what is was.
I don't wish to cause you upset - but just some encouragement to get a real look at the bigger picture. (Like a diagnosis of the situation).
One thing to consider about the Boost and similar drinks is that most brands contain a huge amount of sugar (sometimes one has as much as 30% of a day's supply). If diabetes is a factor, be on the lookout for this. Ensure has one kind that contains a muscle-building protein, and it contains even more protein than their "high-protein" variety. Consider making your own smoothies from fruits and sneak in some vegetables and protein powder when you do it.
You are just ONE person after all & more of the village approach is becoming needed now. So enlist those Aging Health groups. Mum may be upset but you are inviting help from others because you CARE.
Take a look on the forum for articles on Anagnosia:
https://www.agingcare.com/search?term=Anagnosia
Not only with dementia, many others have it too (eg common with many mental illnesses). This *lack of insight* into needing help.
My sister has it (confirmed by Doctor) - her brain does not recognise her deficits. She cannot tell the difference between her *wants* and actual *needs*. Once I learnt this, I understood why she was so resistant & lost my guilt at upsetting her.
My dad was losing weight (especially around his shoulders) & I had to do something. Most of my dad's nutrition comes from shakes now. He will eat some oatmeal or fruit in the morning, but he gets 64 oz of liquid salad a day. He has no necessary meds(sleep aid, if needed) with excellent vitals.
That would help resolve the cost issue AND THEN you can blend up some yummy smoothies made with fresh ingredients you buy with some of the savings?
My mom gulps 2 Starbucks coffee drinks as soon as she wakes up and gulps then down all day long. Starbucks Frappuccino are not even food. I have to buy 12 cases of 4 per month. Not cheap and not as healthy as Boost.
Get her dr to prescribe them since she WILL drink them and the dr seems to be fine about the liquid diet your mom has chosen.
You might try the dome or placing food in clear containers so your mother can see it. When short term memory goes, people resort to using eyesight to compensate so if it cannot be seen, it no longer exists.
Just drinking Boost or Ensure alone can actually cause diarrhea.
Also, it can end up making your mom not be able to swallow anything but liquid.
Maybe she just doesn't like fixing her meals.
If she doesn't have someone to cook for her, Try buying Lean Cuisine or Healthy Request frozen dinners to microwave.
As a person ages, they start losing their smell and taste, along with their eyesight.
They need their food spice up a bit.
That's why they seem to gravitate towards sweets.
i found when he drank Boost that he is too full for anything else so I just give it to him in evening.
I don’t ask if he wants to eat, I have a small amount (I even cut up meat to make eating easier but I don’t have to). He was born in depression and hates to waste.
I now sit right beside him and distract him while he is eating. He is now deaf so I keep writing things down. After a few minutes most of food is gone.
Granted this is time consuming on my part and he is still very skeleton like but it kind of works for me. At 95 I think not all food has to be healthy either so lunch yesterday was ice cream and cookies😁
Good luck! It is tough!
To truly steer her back toward solids, take baby steps, literally. Think of the things that babies like: Applesauce, puréed foods, soft and bland, easy to digest. Mild. White rice, bananas. Soft white bread. Cool yogurts. Cut the crusts off. Bake her chicken that is unseasoned, bring in more flavors gradually. Make sure the foods are delicious and fresh. She is probably bothered by subtle taste differences that you cannot even detect. Have lots of choices available. If she doesn’t show interest, take them out of her sight so she doesn’t become overwhelmed and reject food more. Make meals social. Invite her friends or family. Depression could also trigger a loss of interest in food. Watch cooking shows (get her involved with cooking) - this also works with kids.
My mom stopped eating solids twice in her life, first when she had colon cancer. Her doctor had said she didn’t need screening- after all, it had been less than 10 years.... She appreciated his care, but he should not have overlooked her multiple symptoms.
Mom survived the cancer but then many years later, as she was having different health problems, she literally lost the taste for food (and even refused boost). We worked with her very closely, using the methods and psychology above, and she slowly returned first to Boost, then to eating just a little more, later to her normal interest and hunger. I used to take videos of her eating and talking about how good everything tasted on my phone because I was so happy and recognized we had come so far.