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Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
Share a few details and we will match you to trusted home care in your area:
How far does your brother live from your sister? Is it close enough that she can bring your mom over and tell him that Mom will be staying with him for several days so that he can provide the care that he thinks is so easy?
Can you be more specific about how he is making things difficult for any change?
When you say "signing power" are you saying he is joint on her account? Or he is her PoA?
If your brother doesn't agree to make it financially possible to transition your Mom to a facility when you and your sister are burnt out, then you two need to step completely away and tell your brother he is now in charge of all her care. This will feel very difficult to do, but this is the leverage you have. Tell him if he doesn't start operating in her own best interests you will report her to APS.
Or, would he be more amenable to hiring in-home aids for her? Nonetheless, he'd have to make it possible to pay for them.
Can you elaborate more with the things he is making difficult? Does he aide in the hands on care of your mother? Is he just ignoring your sister's difficulty in caring for her? If so, drop your mother off for a visit for a couple of weeks. Bet that will change his tune dramatically.
Sometimes taking a more direct approach such as this will facilitate your mother going a professional care setting. But sadly siblings do not always have the same views when it comes to caring and end of life directives for their parents.
Is your mother mentally capable to change signing power? Can your mother consult with an eldercare attorney to change any directives?
Sorry you and family have conflicting views on the stage of care your mother is needing. It really isn't fair to her or the main care giver.
Who is POA here? If sister and brother disagree as to whether hands on caregiving should continue, the BROTHER does the caring. Ask him when he would like Mom to arrive. It's that simple.
And if sister has no POA here and is doing the caregiving that is and was very poor decision making. She should inform brother now of what shared living costs and caregiving payment she expects to continue this care, and give him resignation of care letter when he refuses. To be honest, if this caregiving sister cannot speak to the "in charge brother" then she should enlist and attorney to do so FOR HER.
Then sister walks away from caring for mom. She can go to Court and tell the Judge that the POA for Finance is hindering her ability to safely care for mom. You tell the Judge that it is no longer safe for her to care for her at home. If there are the funds for caregivers tell the Judge that the alternative would be 24/7 caregivers to help care for mom. There is no way a Judge would jeopardize the safety of a dependent.
If brother is not actually POA for finances (legally) then sister can find some reason to have mom transported to the hospital. (possible UTI, dehydration, anxiety) and at that point she tells the staff that she can no longer safely care for mom and that "her brother George" is the responsible party.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
When you say "signing power" are you saying he is joint on her account? Or he is her PoA?
If your brother doesn't agree to make it financially possible to transition your Mom to a facility when you and your sister are burnt out, then you two need to step completely away and tell your brother he is now in charge of all her care. This will feel very difficult to do, but this is the leverage you have. Tell him if he doesn't start operating in her own best interests you will report her to APS.
Or, would he be more amenable to hiring in-home aids for her? Nonetheless, he'd have to make it possible to pay for them.
Sometimes taking a more direct approach such as this will facilitate your mother going a professional care setting. But sadly siblings do not always have the same views when it comes to caring and end of life directives for their parents.
Is your mother mentally capable to change signing power? Can your mother consult with an eldercare attorney to change any directives?
Sorry you and family have conflicting views on the stage of care your mother is needing. It really isn't fair to her or the main care giver.
And if sister has no POA here and is doing the caregiving that is and was very poor decision making. She should inform brother now of what shared living costs and caregiving payment she expects to continue this care, and give him resignation of care letter when he refuses. To be honest, if this caregiving sister cannot speak to the "in charge brother" then she should enlist and attorney to do so FOR HER.
She can go to Court and tell the Judge that the POA for Finance is hindering her ability to safely care for mom.
You tell the Judge that it is no longer safe for her to care for her at home. If there are the funds for caregivers tell the Judge that the alternative would be 24/7 caregivers to help care for mom.
There is no way a Judge would jeopardize the safety of a dependent.
If brother is not actually POA for finances (legally) then sister can find some reason to have mom transported to the hospital. (possible UTI, dehydration, anxiety) and at that point she tells the staff that she can no longer safely care for mom and that "her brother George" is the responsible party.
If he's not willing to have her moved into care, then he has to take her.