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V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Jennyc I may not be on target at all but a few words of advice.... in dealing with a person you can't reason with or find compromise is a quote from Einstein... The definition of crazy is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results. I am not saying you or your Mom is crazy but, I get the feeling that a padded room might feel like a vacation to you at this point. I know your trying to solve problems and that's a good thing, you care, nothing wrong with caring not at all. You need to try to separate things like a file of issues, there's a crisis list, a what's important right now! pile, can I do it today? pile , Is this really important today? pile, etc. Mentally try not stressing about stuff you can't control. Oh and simplify your daily goals. Be proud of each day you can go to bed saying.... well... I'm alive.... Mom's alive... I made it today!!!! Praise yourself for accomplishing the day of caring and just making it until tomorrow when you wake up so you get to see the next drama adventure that awaits you. What I mean is that's the reason good people are here on this site we use or experiences to make someone else life a bit easier. I'm am glad you mentioned Lyme. I am not glad your Mom contracted this in any way. What I mean by glad is that I am a sufferer of Lyme and most people do not really, truly understand the damage it does. I really don't think scientists or Dr's really know exactly what extent of damage it can cause. I am mentioning this to you and all the people here because.... it is a cause of many illnesses or triggers them due to the immune system being compromised....many muscle, joint, arthritic pain, severe headaches, bells palsy, crippling, etc. etc. etc. it also can break a barrier that only one other disease can and that is syphilis other diseases cannot do this and has effects on the brain and brain functions. The spirochetes that are active with lyme infection are tricky. In my experience I have personally felt the existence in my body as The spirochetes "hang out" (in my words) behind the eyes and knee joints. I have read articles about this all as well. I would like to add to this. In most cases of tick bites you do not know you were bitten. This is because the ticks have a natural anesthesia so you feel nothing. It is also important to see a Dr. within 24 hours of a tick bite, they carry many infectious diseases, some fatal. I contracted lyme disease from a deer tick bite I suffered from flu symptoms for 2 weeks then saw a bulls-eye rash around the bite... woke one day stiff as a board, I could not move. I went to Dr. after taking many advil just to be able to walk. I saw a Dr. she was very concerned about the length of time after bite. She urged immediate treatment and called the pharmacy and told me to take it immediately. The longer Lyme goes untreated the more damage it causes and symptoms can be debilitating. So please check your self after being outdoors no matter where you are ticks are all over the place. They are in trees, leaves, all animals and birds in the wild and humans are all hosts of ticks, so they are not just traveling on Deer. I suffer every day ever since my bite, and I was properly treated basically early. Some people have symptoms and go without proper diagnosis or don't realize how serious this is and go untreated. I am sharing this information for awareness purposes. I don't want others to suffer. Believe me... ""Only two weeks"" of not knowing I was bitten and going untreated during that two weeks.... Lyme disease has caused me to live a life in discomfort and daily pain. Now I can only get treatment for the symptoms, but this will never reverse the damage and yet it still progressively gets worse. These are my own words....and you could say.... "my facts of my life with Lyme"
Thank you and I agree. Yes I am worried too that she IS telling the truth but a couple years ago when she first moved in to stop letting her beloved cats sleep on her bed especailly in Spring and Summer. She did not. locks them in her room at night so "something doesn't get them at night" and she ends up with Lyme disease. Didn't phase her a bit. Kept the cats in her room. There are 4 teens in this house that come and go, let the cats in and out as they sit at the door waiting and run out as you walk in and BTW they are outside country cats and old survivors. So one thing I offered her the other day was to have her apartment exterminated. She says well what difference will that make if I let the cats in.....I said well you can't let them in then if you think they are the carriers--well that was the end of that. I tried to explain that if a room in the house is infested it would not be long until the entire house is and she is right on the first floor with the main house. I am going to have them spray anyway to see if that eases her angst. The eye thing I am aware of. I worked side by side with an Ophthalmologist for 6 years. Vitreous floaters are common but scary for people the first time it happens. They break off and float across your field of vision. I am certain this is not it. This is a "I feel it" thing not I see it. Todays is another day. Another day of breathing in fumes of rubbing alcohol as my office is right next to her in-law! Ahhhhh. Dr did not call yesterday. Hopefully today or by end of day will just schedule apt but really wanted to give her a heads up out of ear shot of my mother.
Jennyc These are great posts by from experienced people who honestly know better about this subject than most Dr's. do about this sort of stuff, unless they have lived it themselves. You should be writing this stuff down. After a while believe me it's hard to recall some things yourself because it almost becomes normal to you. Or shall I say your skin gets tougher. You may not notice changes that are slight but relevant to medication, treatment, etc I would like to add, my boss a healthy mid 60's man, eats well, exercises regularly and has no memory issues at all... opened up to a coworker about seeing things like fly's, she caught him swatting at nothing one day. So Eyesight was his issue. I am not saying this is your Mom's entire problem but it just may be a part of it. I knew my Mom had Dementia and she kept telling me she heard knocking at the door every morning for a week. I assumed it was audio psychosis, hearing things because of dementia, or from medication. I didn't hear it... then one day,,, I heard it she didn't... LOL it was a woodpecker. Mom said I told you I wasn't crazy. I never called her crazy but she was right she wasn't. That's when I realized I needed to listen to complaints and try to understand why she was reacting to things and assess the cause. Settings, time of day, after meals, before meals, sugar levels, blood pressure, sleeping enough not sleeping enough, stress, etc. all are factors in behaviors in all of us. It sounds like your Mom needs to be under very close watch for sure though. Hope you accomplished some answers at the Dr today.
Thank you all. To daizy yes she moves around fine. daily activities are helping fold laundry, watering plants, feeding cat and dog, yesterday went out for a walk around the yard, reads a lot, puts around her inlaw but latley spraying rubbing alcohol everywhere including on herself!. Noticed today my plant she has been nurturing daily no water for days, its the little things like that I am noticing too. Called doc today and left msg concerning bugs-aksed for call back. Told mom we will go see her to see about "rash" that really is not there any more than dry skin she has had for years. Hoping doc will talk to her about her fears etc. Thank you so much. I like these forums for the REAL sense of peoples feedback. Know you are going to get a few strange ones but for the most part all very helpful.
Yes Jennyc....that's when things started with my mom. She would claim there were ants all over her dining room table or climbing on the walls....I would have her evaluated by her doctor. They can slow things down with medications. If she is young and still able to move around on her own. Keeping her busy will help. Don't argue with her....just changed the subject or distract her. Because arguing with someone that has dementia is more frustrating. In her mind that's how things look...and trying to convince her otherwise will only escalate things. I lost my sweet mom this last January...she was 91 and had a progressive dementia. The journey was horrible and went downward fast. I hope you learn as much as possible about the disease and find ways to deal with it. Good Luck and God bless.
Thank you. Yes that is the other thing I have noticed lately that she has an issue with something, I address it, she agrees then the next day decides she disagrees. The new thing is we have been thru life line, life alert and its all unsubstanciated objections. The other day she went out to cross the street to get the mail which I have asked her to not do in general but she did not have her lifeline on--I was driving up the street and saw her--she is wobbly with a cane. Her reasoning? I just don't like it. UGHHHHHH. I know many have it a lot worse. Thank you for the input Nancy. Setting up Dr appt today.
Hi, My mother suffers from delusional parisitosis, and picks herself raw. It is a sign of dementia and I have her in assisted living finally,where she is being given medication.They do believe this is real and have the itching crawling sensation. Very sad and destuctive. My advice get her on meds, wish I had not waited but she did refuse. Zyprexa to help her leave it alone.
Oops I hit report the post by mistake--sorry! If it comes up I will be sure to say my error. Thank you so much for your answer. The more I think of it the more I think she has some anxiety. Although we have a house full of teens here she seems to be isolating herself more. I asked her it she would like to go out tomorrow and she said the drive to the store too long (about 25 min) which surprised me. I am going to make her a Dr appt and speak to the Dr prior about the situation.
So many doctors will gloss this over, but it is something to look at. People who feel like bugs are crawling on them will often damage their own skin, scratching and picking. If your mother has some marks on her, a good dermatologist can frequently tell if the cause is anxiety, obsession, or attention-seeking behavior. (Sometimes the person may not be aware it is attention seeking.) Doctors can check for UTIs, liver function, and do a skin scrape if needed. It doesn't sound like your mother is psychotic, so it may be something that can be handled simply.
Could there be some dementia? Maybe. I am beginning to believe that dementia is very common in people over 80, but many are still able to function fairly well. I guess what we can hope for older people is that their minds last as long as their bodies do.
Thank you. This is sudden This is an 85 year old woman who did her own income taxes a month ago but about 2 years ago had a similar obessession with bed bugs. NO she has NOT seen any bugs--both times. And with the bed bugs scare we had exterminators come in 3 X, threw out mattress which was brand new, etc. I am trying to figure out is this the beginning of some dementia or is it just her own personal phobia. Nothing else has changed much in her personality.
Is she seeing bugs? If it is a sudden thing, you may want to have her doctor check for a urinary tract infection. If she is feeling them, it could be many things. My mother thought her room had cracks in the floor that were letting bugs in. She could feel them. It may have had to do with a bladder infection that was developing with her. It didn't last too long. Let her doctor know about the bugs and he can check into the possibilities.
If your mom has dementia, this is very common. Between giving her some meds to combat this, I suggest you tell her that you have it under control and the problem is taken care of. Sometimes this works unless her delusion causes her problems such as anxiety then you may need to add some medication.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
The definition of crazy is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results. I am not saying you or your Mom is crazy but, I get the feeling that a padded room might feel like a vacation to you at this point.
I know your trying to solve problems and that's a good thing, you care, nothing wrong with caring not at all. You need to try to separate things like a file of issues, there's a crisis list, a what's important right now! pile, can I do it today? pile , Is this really important today? pile, etc. Mentally try not stressing about stuff you can't control. Oh and simplify your daily goals. Be proud of each day you can go to bed saying.... well... I'm alive.... Mom's alive... I made it today!!!! Praise yourself for accomplishing the day of caring and just making it until tomorrow when you wake up so you get to see the next drama adventure that awaits you. What I mean is that's the reason good people are here on this site we use or experiences to make someone else life a bit easier.
I'm am glad you mentioned Lyme. I am not glad your Mom contracted this in any way. What I mean by glad is that I am a sufferer of Lyme and most people do not really, truly understand the damage it does. I really don't think scientists or Dr's really know exactly what extent of damage it can cause. I am mentioning this to you and all the people here because.... it is a cause of many illnesses or triggers them due to the immune system being compromised....many muscle, joint, arthritic pain, severe headaches, bells palsy, crippling, etc. etc. etc. it also can break a barrier that only one other disease can and that is syphilis other diseases cannot do this and has effects on the brain and brain functions. The spirochetes that are active with lyme infection are tricky. In my experience I have personally felt the existence in my body as The spirochetes "hang out" (in my words) behind the eyes and knee joints. I have read articles about this all as well.
I would like to add to this. In most cases of tick bites you do not know you were bitten. This is because the ticks have a natural anesthesia so you feel nothing. It is also important to see a Dr. within 24 hours of a tick bite, they carry many infectious diseases, some fatal. I contracted lyme disease from a deer tick bite I suffered from flu symptoms for 2 weeks then saw a bulls-eye rash around the bite... woke one day stiff as a board, I could not move. I went to Dr. after taking many advil just to be able to walk. I saw a Dr. she was very concerned about the length of time after bite. She urged immediate treatment and called the pharmacy and told me to take it immediately. The longer Lyme goes untreated the more damage it causes and symptoms can be debilitating. So please check your self after being outdoors no matter where you are ticks are all over the place. They are in trees, leaves, all animals and birds in the wild and humans are all hosts of ticks, so they are not just traveling on Deer. I suffer every day ever since my bite, and I was properly treated basically early. Some people have symptoms and go without proper diagnosis or don't realize how serious this is and go untreated. I am sharing this information for awareness purposes. I don't want others to suffer. Believe me... ""Only two weeks"" of not knowing I was bitten and going untreated during that two weeks.... Lyme disease has caused me to live a life in discomfort and daily pain. Now I can only get treatment for the symptoms, but this will never reverse the damage and yet it still progressively gets worse.
These are my own words....and you could say.... "my facts of my life with Lyme"
The eye thing I am aware of. I worked side by side with an Ophthalmologist for 6 years. Vitreous floaters are common but scary for people the first time it happens. They break off and float across your field of vision. I am certain this is not it. This is a "I feel it" thing not I see it. Todays is another day. Another day of breathing in fumes of rubbing alcohol as my office is right next to her in-law! Ahhhhh. Dr did not call yesterday. Hopefully today or by end of day will just schedule apt but really wanted to give her a heads up out of ear shot of my mother.
I would like to add, my boss a healthy mid 60's man, eats well, exercises regularly and has no memory issues at all... opened up to a coworker about seeing things like fly's, she caught him swatting at nothing one day. So Eyesight was his issue. I am not saying this is your Mom's entire problem but it just may be a part of it.
I knew my Mom had Dementia and she kept telling me she heard knocking at the door every morning for a week. I assumed it was audio psychosis, hearing things because of dementia, or from medication. I didn't hear it... then one day,,, I heard it she didn't... LOL it was a woodpecker. Mom said I told you I wasn't crazy. I never called her crazy but she was right she wasn't. That's when I realized I needed to listen to complaints and try to understand why she was reacting to things and assess the cause. Settings, time of day, after meals, before meals, sugar levels, blood pressure, sleeping enough not sleeping enough, stress, etc. all are factors in behaviors in all of us. It sounds like your Mom needs to be under very close watch for sure though. Hope you accomplished some answers at the Dr today.
My mother suffers from delusional parisitosis, and picks herself raw. It is a sign
of dementia and I have her in assisted living finally,where she is being given medication.They do believe this is real and have the itching crawling sensation. Very sad and destuctive. My advice get her on meds, wish I had not waited but she did refuse.
Zyprexa to help her leave it alone.
Could there be some dementia? Maybe. I am beginning to believe that dementia is very common in people over 80, but many are still able to function fairly well. I guess what we can hope for older people is that their minds last as long as their bodies do.