My mom has Alzheimer's and I have POA. I have been managing her money fine. She has credit card, debit card and can make withdrawals at bank, which hasn't been a problem.
Until now.
My brother, sensing mom's rapidly increasing loss in judgment has been coming around getting money from her.
She has been scared of him in the past, he is a felon, and she wrote him out of her will.
I am thinking of just closing the account and opening a new one, in mom's name, at a different bank. She lacks the ability to sleuth out the new bank at this point, and frankly my brother never had that ability.
Anyone see a problem? Of course I'll make sure she still had cash as needed.
Help!
Very good attorney
Very good therapist
Guardianship
Restraining Order
P.S. mothers money pays for attorney instead of brothers extortion
My mom is actually very angry with me because she's in total denial about her condition and i dared to say she was unable to manage her funds.
She will be furious if I move money. Today she asked me to not help her manage her affairs any more.
Apparently she and my brother have been trying to get her will changed this week as well.
My mom has always been emotionally abusive.
Today I feel like just letting go. why should I put up with all this abuse and she's making managing her affairs so difficult.
Feeling defeated.
Or just take Mom's credit card and debit card. Make up a "theraputic fib" as to why you are taking the cards. Such as everything is now with an Accountant and he/she mentioned there was a serious issue with the credit/debit card. Thus, if your brother believes Mom if she tells him an Accountant has everything, he might feel his personal ATM [Mom] is closed for good.
Since you are Mom's Power of Attorney, you can have Mom's checking/savings account re-named to say "Mom's name OR POW's name.... yes, the "or" is part of the account name. That way all bills can be sent to your address and you can sign the checks for Mom, or if Mom wants to sign a check she can.
My elderly Dad was happy with just $25 in his wallet. Dad did have a credit card which had a very low low limit.
Thank goodness your Mom lives at Assisted Living, per your profile. That way if your brother raises his voice to Mom, an Aide could hear it, take action and/or call security.
IF you can, keep her on a very small "cash only" basis for small expenditures.
My brother robbed my parents blind. After he took all the equity out of their home, mother went to "cash only" and he'd take whatever of that she'd give him.
Luckily for us, mother never learned how to use a debit card. She writes a few checks a month. She has a little cash.
Sadly, in our case, brother just basically stole our parents' peace of mind, and they had to sell the house, couldn't afford the payments on the new mortgage.
Be prepared for a huge backlash from bully brother. They never change.
You may want to start research on the whatevers on guardianship for your state, so your not quite as flummoxed later on.
Will there be any repercussions from your brother's no longer being able to bully/swindle your mother into giving him cash? Once you've done the paperwork it might (you know best) be a good idea to tell him your mother no longer has access to the account so that he doesn't continue to pester her, or God forbid worse. If she is really frightened of him, and especially if she has good reason to be, perhaps you ought to take advice from the police or a lawyer on how to control his access to her.