My 94 year old mother in law has been diagnosed with moderate dementia/Alzheimer's disease. She lives in a lovely assisted living apartment and has been there for 2 months. We have recently seen a geriatric neurologist and she is on an anti-depressant (has been for 6 weeks). However, her cognitive abilities are rapidly declining and all she does is cry. She calls the family constantly and thinks she's been abandoned and everyone hates her. Nothing we say reassures her or makes her feel better. She just can't stop crying. I think she needs to be on an anti-anxiety med. Any input or feedback is appreciated.
However. It may be - just *may* - that your MIL's current mental suffering proves intractable, for example if it is the result of a localised brain tissue problem and it is impossible to correct it or compensate for it with medication. Should that be the case, and I hope it won't, try to be comforted. With some things, all you can do is bear with the person and absorb some of her fear. This too will pass.
It could be something as simple as a filler reaction that is making your mother-in-law feel like crying.... that happened to me when I tried a certain over-the-counter antihistamine, and my doctor told me to stay away from that *family* of medicines.
Thus, see if you can get that anti-depressant from a different manufacturer to see if there is a difference.... if that doesn't help, then maybe MIL needs to try a different anti-depressant. Let her doctor know what is happening.
However, you did the right thing by helping her move into assisted living. Once someone gets past a certain point in their dementia they are very, very difficult to care for at home.
I'm assuming that your family visits and brings her little gifts.
Give her some more time to get used to the facility. I know in different areas of the country people call "nursing homes" by different names. Here in MO an "assisted living facility" is an apartment in which the person is pretty independent but there is staff on the premises but the person doesn't get specialized services from any kind of support staff.
If this is the kind of place she's in you might want to try an anti-anxiety med. I'm all for anti-anxiety meds in people with dementia. But with no one there to monitor her you don't want her too dopey so that she can't get around. If you can figure out how to have her monitored after being administered an anti-anxiety medication I'd do that.
When someone has dementia it's not like their brain shuts down and that's that. There's still understanding (to a point), there are still neurons firing, still synapses making connections. And from my years of experience in healthcare it's my opinion that people with dementia know on some level and only up to a point that there's something wrong. We just don't know what point that is because by the time they reach it they're unable to communicate their feelings and experiences. I liken it to a nightmare you can't wake up from. It must be very uncomfortable for people with dementia. And when people with dementia obsess over things, I think that's anxiety. And if someone with a terminal and horrible illness like dementia is anxious they should be given anti-anxiety medication.
*climbing down off of soapbox*
Definitely try an anti-anxiety med.