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All day long she will have crying jags, moan, repeat herself, sleep, be pathetic, doesn't remember. When my sister drops by she is alert and lucid. What gives?

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It's called show-timing, and it's why they can fool doctors, friends and family who aren't with them for extended periods of time into believing they are just fine and caregivers like you are exaggerating!
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My mother does that when my brothers come. She doesn't see them often, so they're new and shiny to her. She sees me every day, so I'm old hat. No need for showtiming when I'm around.
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I find it so frustrating. I retired from my job to take care of her. I go crazy all day long with her and she is so different when my sister comes by or my brother phones her. She makes me look like I'm exaggerating all the time. It's like when my kids were little they would be so good at their friends house and be wild at home.
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