My 84-year-old mom fell and broke her pelvic bone and she’s in a rehab place. My dad passed away unexpectedly six months ago and she was living alone as her dementia was not so bad. Since she’s been in rehab she has not eaten anything , she doesn’t feel good she’s constantly nauseous , her INR‘s were up to seven when they’re supposed to be 2 to 3, yesterday her blood pressure went from 97 to 147, and she’s sounding more and more lethargic. I only know what my mom tells me because of Covid and I can occasionally talk to the nurses but they only know what they’ve done it’s very frustrating and I feel like she’s not gonna recover because she doesn’t have any strength . I don’t think she has any will. I don’t get a lot of communication from them at all they only have consultations with the social worker and the nutritionist once a week and my first one will be on Christmas Eve and she will have been there two weeks by then. She is scheduled to go to an assisted living facility when she meets her goals for that but I feel like she’s fading away and I don’t know what to do and I feel like they're not really addressing her health issues she also has congestive heart failure and a fib I’m afraid she’s just gonna die in there and I don’t know what to do. I’m going to be speaking with the nurse manager today but this place I feel doesn’t communicate very well and I’m not sure if they’re medically aware of what’s going on with her and the doctor only sees the patients two times a week I don’t even know if she’s ever seen the doctor. I have talked to a couple of the nurses and made them very aware of everything, some of them are nice but I don’t feel like they're watching how horribly she’s going downhill because I know her better than they do but how can a person go for nine days without eating and then just think that’s OK? I don’t think they do feeding tubes but I’m gonna ask them today. I don’t know if I should just have her go back to the hospital or not. I talk to her on the phone and she’s able to talk and stuff but she is getting more lethargic and is not making much sense and she has dementia which seems to be getting worse as the days go on, I assume it’s because she’s just laying in a bed doing nothing and not eating.
My father did the hospital followed by rehab routine a number of times. It was very hard on him, especially as his congestive heart failure progressed. He would eat little and sleep more. He became less and less able to participate in therapy and getting back to normal meant a new normal of less ability than before. This is hard to accept, our family struggled with it, but came to understand over time that it’s the natural course of aging and progression of losing mobility. It’s heartbreaking to watch. I’m glad you’re advocating for your mom, I did the same so many times. Persist in getting your questions answered, but also know there are times where there aren’t any good answers for our parents
If your mother isnt progressing in rehab, she will be released as Medicare won't pay. If she's really laying in bed all day, that's not something Medicare will continue to pay for....they require PT and OT updates from the facility constantly!
Dementia tends to worsen in hospital and rehab because they're out of their normal environment.
Speak to her doctor immediately for an update. Ask him to check these details she's telling you and to confirm them to be truth or not. Does he feel like she's giving up and ready to die??
You can demand her release from this rehab or that she be transferred to another one, which I've done for my mother.
It's a terrible time for such rehab stays when you can't visit. Ask about a window visit. If she's on the first floor, show up at her window and knock on it! I would.
Kick up a fuss and demand some answers from her doctor!
Good luck!