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I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
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VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
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1) during the rages does he get violent at all? Is he apt to harm himself, you or anyone else? If the answer to this is yes you need to talk to his doctor and explain the situation and say that you are not safe or he is not safe. 2) And has he actually been diagnosed with Alzheimer's or was this the diagnosis because the did no further testing? 3) Talk to your pharmacist and ask if this could possibly be a side effect of any medication he is taking. Let then know all prescribed, OTC, Herbal, supplements that your husband is taking. 4) Is there anything in particular that brings on the rages or is it just out of the blue? Is it the way he argues if you disagree? Is it a way he reacts if he does not want to discuss something?
The advice right now is when he begins one of these rages is just say "I can not watch this" and get up and leave the room. Do not engage in any more conversation as he will not hear anything you say. Do not yell, do not react other than to say you can not watch this and leave. Maybe like a child with a temper tantrum if he does not have an audience the rage may shorten in duration. Also the advice is..if you are not safe you need to call 911 and tell the dispatcher that you feel you are not safe or if you think he is going to harm himself you tell them that.
I second a contact to his doctor first, followed by a potential consult with a behavioral psychiatrist, who may recommend counseling WITH medication.
While you are in process with this PLEASE MAKE TIME to pull together a list of some small “treats” that will soothe your soul as demands on you increase.
I had my coffee with the moon yesterday, in my silent living room. A few minutes of wonderful. I deserved it. You do too.
You sure do have your hands full! What do you do when he is having these rages? Do you engage? I would leave the property! Regardless of the reason for it, you do not need to witness his outbursts. Yikes.
You definitely need some medical help in this department. This is not normal nor tolerable behavior. Does he have early onset dementia? I know it happens (FIL was diagnosed around 60) but a bit unusual. Could it be something else?
Does your mom need care too? Is sister helping? Hopefully you gals are a team that can work together and get things done.
Yet, there is a lot for 2 people caring for 2 people to do so you might want to bring in some outside help. Like a cleaning lady to start with, for instance. And someone to stay at the house so you and your sister can both get out every now and then.
You don't say whether you've discussed this behavior with his doctor, so that would be my first suggestion. My mom suffered a drastic decline recently that included some loud, argumentative and what I'd call tantrum like behavior and her doctor put her on new medication and that has helped a lot.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
If the answer to this is yes you need to talk to his doctor and explain the situation and say that you are not safe or he is not safe.
2) And has he actually been diagnosed with Alzheimer's or was this the diagnosis because the did no further testing?
3) Talk to your pharmacist and ask if this could possibly be a side effect of any medication he is taking. Let then know all prescribed, OTC, Herbal, supplements that your husband is taking.
4) Is there anything in particular that brings on the rages or is it just out of the blue? Is it the way he argues if you disagree? Is it a way he reacts if he does not want to discuss something?
The advice right now is when he begins one of these rages is just say "I can not watch this" and get up and leave the room. Do not engage in any more conversation as he will not hear anything you say. Do not yell, do not react other than to say you can not watch this and leave. Maybe like a child with a temper tantrum if he does not have an audience the rage may shorten in duration.
Also the advice is..if you are not safe you need to call 911 and tell the dispatcher that you feel you are not safe or if you think he is going to harm himself you tell them that.
While you are in process with this PLEASE MAKE TIME to pull together a list of some small “treats” that will soothe your soul as demands on you increase.
I had my coffee with the moon yesterday, in my silent living room. A few minutes of wonderful. I deserved it. You do too.
You definitely need some medical help in this department. This is not normal nor tolerable behavior. Does he have early onset dementia? I know it happens (FIL was diagnosed around 60) but a bit unusual. Could it be something else?
Does your mom need care too? Is sister helping? Hopefully you gals are a team that can work together and get things done.
Yet, there is a lot for 2 people caring for 2 people to do so you might want to bring in some outside help. Like a cleaning lady to start with, for instance. And someone to stay at the house so you and your sister can both get out every now and then.
Take care of yourselves too!
And violence is common with some types of dementia.
It sounds like your husband may have some frustration and anxiety. I would call his doctor. There maybe a med he can be given for this.