Follow
Share
This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.
Find Care & Housing
I think your profile says it all. You're angry & burned out from living with your mother 24/7. Why not get her back into Assisted Living and take your life back?? I could never, ever, under any circumstances care for my 93 y/o mother in my home. Just the mobility issues alone, never mind the dementia, would have me on anti-depressants BIG time!!

Best of luck!
Helpful Answer (3)
Report
NeedHelpWithMom Mar 2020
You’re too wise to allow yourself to be placed in that situation. Keep telling your story. Many can learn from your experiences.
(1)
Report
Karla
Find mom a friend. If she has funds maybe a student designer would love to visit and shop for her.
Your mom is confined and her surroundings are important to her. 11 months is a long time to have a guest. What were her plans for the future? What are yours?
You sound stuck. You need time to get your life back on track.
It’s time for more than a fresh design for mom. Do level with the brothers that it’s not working for you. They probably already know that and are waiting on you to take action.
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

I totally agree with lealonnie. You have reached your limit and approaching the burn out stage. This is not a criticism from me. I have been there. I cared for my mom for 15 years in my home. Trust me, I felt everything that you are feeling. I did burn out.

My brothers who did nothing but criticize me and never helped drove me crazy! I became terribly resentful.

Wouldn’t you know, mom favored my brothers! I gave up and told mom if they felt that I did such a lousy job (doctors complemented me on my caregiving!) then they could take over and I told mom to go live with my brother and sister in law.

Please take your life back. Why did you remove her from assisted living? This is more than you can handle. Please don’t feel guilty. Tell her it is no longer working out and look into placement for her.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report
KarlaDay Mar 2020
I know her room is very important to her and she’s always loved to decorate. It’s something we both have in common. But she changes things every 2-3 days because it’s all she’s got. She’s not able to do anything else. And she forgets. She puts things away and then changes stuff and then can’t find anything.
The funny thing about the room, she’s not in there unless she’s changing the decorating. She doesn’t like to be in there because she’s by herself.
My mom broke her left femur and she can’t live by herself. I didn’t want her in a nursing home. After a year, already, I’m so mentally frazzled. She’s always got a great attitude and she tells me thank you all the time. But, since we even moved into a 55+ she’s more isolated. She’s had a stroke years ago, the old hip fracture that causes enough pain for her that she can’t sit up too long. Going to church or anywhere takes its toll on both of us.
Her dementia is getting really bad, she’s becoming more and more incontinent because she can’t make it to the bathroom.
I love my mom. Boy, I hate how I feel on the inside. It’s awful.
(2)
Report
See 1 more reply
This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.
Ask a Question
Subscribe to
Our Newsletter