She's 95 with Dementia. A-type personality, bi-polar most of her life and controlling. Because she didn't bother to get a will or have any beneficiaries in place after my dad passed, her social worker suggested calling the free services of Elder Law, which we did, and they drew up all the paperwork for POA and Ladybird Deed. My mom voluntarily signed everything. After a few weeks, her behavior got worse so I called the Dementia hotline and they told me to get her to the doctor to check for a UTI which she did have and was treated for it, but then she stopped taking the antibiotics midstream so I don't think they worked. Now she's claiming we conspired and will try to kill her now that she's so-called gave her home away. Everyday she keeps saying she will die today, spewing venom and fantasies that I turned everyone against her. I'm not sleeping worrying she might walk out of the house because she's not sleeping either. It's so hard to hear how much she hates me. I'm falling into a depression.
Apparently an attorney did.
If your Mom is then competent, she is competent to change her POA and to file charges.
So I guess we will await seeing how competent she is.
For me you have taken on POA over someone you cannot control.
How will that work for you?
I can't imagine.
You have made yourself legally responsible for some totally out of control. Moreover there is both dementia and mental illness here. If she is incompetent due to dementia, then your POA holds; if she is incompetent due to mental illness, no court will take her rights from her, so she cannot even get placement.
I never would have done what you did. Neither the deed nor the POA.
So honestly, I cannot advise you. Given the advice you have already received to do as you have done I worry for you.
I can't imagine this going well and I hope you will get good advice and support.
I hope you'll update us and I hope others here may have more useful advice than my own.
If you have not yet red Liz Scheier's wonderful memoir Never Simple, about her own mentally ill mother and her attempts to help her, please do.
It surely is a problem with Chronic UTIs, but Mom has been diagnosed as bipolar and does have some dementia. Take away a clean urine specimen, I suspect you are still left with a whole RAFT of problems.
It will be difficult ALWAYS with her mom to differentiate just what is the problem with her and what to do about it. In fact impossible.
While she may have chronic and ongoing urinary tract infections. I think it unlikely they are the cause of the problems, and no matter what the dipstick shows problems could be ongoing and she's as unlikely to take her medications for infection as she is her medication for bipolar.
We can only guess at the CAUSE and a court will throw their hands up in despair.
The OUTCOME remains the same.
This woman is unlikely to be in control in future, and she is unlikely to be cooperative with anyone, and my advice to the OP is to get out of dodge.
I don't know if YOU, Bounce have read Never Simple, the book I recommended to our OP? It is aptly titled.
With mental illness, no matter what ELSE is going, it is Never Simple.
on another post regarding sleep, the elder was put on Seroquel and Ativan. Talk to her doctor.
ifcthese things to change her mood, then you may ask doctors whst the the step should be