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By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
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III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
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V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
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My mom is refusing to allow us to assist her and thinks her doctor is "crazy". What should we do? She is starting to cash in her retirement accounts on her own because she says she has no money.
The steps Mum had to take were: Get the POA sprung, the lawyer wrote up a new document that Mum took to all the various places that needed a copy. She has a bit of push back at one place, they said they wanted step dad to sign their form, which he could not do, due to being incompetent. A threat to have the lawyer deal with them, got them to change their tune.
Then you take the POA to the investment firms and very clearly state that your mother is no longer capable of making and changes to her accounts and if they take instruction from her they will be out of order and liable for the consequences. The consequences include any taxes owing due to early withdrawal from the accounts.
Once you have cut off Mum from the accounts, then you have to make sure she has pocket money and enough for her weekly expenses.
How much money are you giving Mum to spend? When Mum was POA over Eleanor, she made sure she had an allowance each week. Mum took her shopping and paid for the shopping with Eleanor's cheques (back when cheques were a thing) now she would use the debit card.
What Tothill said, including the allowance. Having taken control of the other accounts, some set up a separate account and put a little in it monthly and give their parent the card for that. Any explanation that you think will work will do. It gives them a sense of independence.
You have to take your POA document, the doctor's letter about your mum's incompetence and go to all her banks and investment companies and make it clear to them that she cannot continue to handle her money as she is incompetent and is wasting it. Perhaps a letter from the lawyer who drew up the POA would be advisable too. In my case, mother's lawyer supported me in taking over finances
I am sorry she is being so resistant. This is one of the hardest phases for care-giving as you take over the parent role, essentially, and she is not ready to give up her independence.
Your mum will not be happy that her life is changing like this, but your responsibility is what is best for her, not necessarily what she wants.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
Then you take the POA to the investment firms and very clearly state that your mother is no longer capable of making and changes to her accounts and if they take instruction from her they will be out of order and liable for the consequences. The consequences include any taxes owing due to early withdrawal from the accounts.
Once you have cut off Mum from the accounts, then you have to make sure she has pocket money and enough for her weekly expenses.
How much money are you giving Mum to spend? When Mum was POA over Eleanor, she made sure she had an allowance each week. Mum took her shopping and paid for the shopping with Eleanor's cheques (back when cheques were a thing) now she would use the debit card.
You have to take your POA document, the doctor's letter about your mum's incompetence and go to all her banks and investment companies and make it clear to them that she cannot continue to handle her money as she is incompetent and is wasting it. Perhaps a letter from the lawyer who drew up the POA would be advisable too. In my case, mother's lawyer supported me in taking over finances
I am sorry she is being so resistant. This is one of the hardest phases for care-giving as you take over the parent role, essentially, and she is not ready to give up her independence.
Your mum will not be happy that her life is changing like this, but your responsibility is what is best for her, not necessarily what she wants.
Goods luck. It is difficult but doable.