My sister’s POA problem. My Sisters’ deceased life partner’s son is her “POA” & 2 years ago he “dropped her off” on my doorstep & announced “He’s DONE!” Now he refuses contact with her or my husband & I. We’ve been trying for the last 2 years to get her Medicaid coverage to cover her Nursing Home bills which are in excess of $130,000 currently! DHS Has repeatedly tried to get copies of her Bank statements from him to no avail & now the NH is threatening to kick her out in 30 days for non-payment! I used to help her pay her bills but gave her back her bank card & “gave up” because she got the card # & had been charging crap right & left as she’s a “Spend Aholic!”
I’m not in the shape to take her back to our home & my husband has previously threatened to divorce me if she moves back (or If I become her POA/Guardian)!
I’m at a loss as to what to do!
You must make it clear that you are not able to care for her. That if you even tried, your marriage would be over and your husband comes first.
If you run into problems with the SW and the system, get a lawyer. If you can't afford that try legal aid or abandon your sister. Make it hard for the NH and authorities to contact u. And if they find you, repeat you cannot care for her.
The NH will in all likelihood try to shame you into picking her up. Give the the POA's contact information and tell them you are not responsible for this mess.
The NH will probably ask the State to take guardianship which is probably the best outcome.
Get in touch with Adult Protective Services and report the situation.
I would also contact the local police and report that the POA has ascended. They might not be able to do anything, but filing a police report shows that you've tried to find him.
Being POA means that you have to keep meticulous records of every cent in and every cent out and it sounds to me that this may have NEVER been done.
You may want to consider APS.
You are not POA. Yet you have taken this woman into your home for two years. Start with an attorney and find out your options.
I am sorry. What a mess you are in. This man should have been removed as POA the day he dumped your Sister.