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Last week my husband heard me making a Doctors appointment for him for next week. Ever since then he asks me numerous times a day every day since “when do we need to leave again”. Then last night, all night long he would wake up and ask me the same question. Twice he turned on the bedroom light (1:00 am and 2:30 am) to begin changing his clothes to get ready as he beloved we needed to leave soon. My sweetheart is unable to sequence dressing himself at this point. Each time I simple told him that his appointment wasn’t until Tuesday and this is Sunday or that he doesn’t have an appointment for today. Should I not tell him of upcoming appointments until the day of? I have wanted to keep him informed and part of the process but it’s apparent that it’s very stressful for him. Thank you for your thoughts.

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Many caregivers go into the process believing that since we always shared experiences with our LO, we should continue to do so. After all, we’ve always been a team, right?

With dementia, they are no long able to be a member of the team. So no, don’t tell him what he no longer can grasp. You’re the whole team now.

So sorry.
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He's lost his sense of time, so no, don't tell him that information anymore.

Sadly, I found the best way to deal with my mom and her dementia was to handle her as I would have handled a toddler. I wouldn't tell my kids days in advance that we were going to the doctor, so I wouldn't tell her either until the day of the appointment.
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I wouldn't tell him anything ahead of time. When I take my step-mother to the doctor, I call her in the morning and tell her I will be there in an hour, well, sometimes she even forgets that, and I find her in the dining room.

His mind no longer assimilates or retains information, the days of sharing are over.

So sorry about this but it is reality that must be accepted.
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He's lost his sense of time, so no, don't tell him that information anymore.

Sadly, I found the best way to deal with my mom and her dementia was to handle her as I would have handled a toddler. I wouldn't tell my kids days in advance that we were going to the doctor, so I wouldn't tell her either until the day of the appointment.
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Just go on as the day is going and as you are leaving for appointment or visiting then you tell him when you arrive. Once they get a thought in their head they will not let go.
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Yes you should only tell him the day of any of his appointments and by all means don't make any further appointments where he is in ear shot.
This will make life better for you both.
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